Chapter 10: What Did I Do Wrong?

Chapter 10: Chapter 10: What Did I Do Wrong?

I struggled desperately, crying for help, nearly consumed by despair.

"That’s enough!" Finally, Julian kicked Brian away.

I knew he hated anyone else touching his things.

He didn’t care about me, but he had touched me, so he naturally saw me as his possession.

I fell to the ground in a heap, curling into a ball and clutching my clothes tightly around me.

Julian seemed to lose interest.

He glared at me, his voice as cold as ice. "Get the fuck out, all of you!"

Brian Morgan and the others knew how to read the room. Seeing Julian’s anger, they scrambled to their feet and left.

Only the two of us remained in the room.

He got up and kicked me in disgust. "I heard you saw Frank Walsh today. Are you that cheap? Were you throwing yourself at him, begging him to sleep with you?"

Frank was a senior from my university. He had pursued me for years and was a genuinely good man.

The reason I went to see Frank that day was that he was about to go abroad to study.

He said he had helped me apply for a spot to study abroad and told me to think it over carefully. After I made up my mind, I was to give him an answer.

It didn’t matter if I didn’t like him; he said he admired my talent and would wait for me in the Republic of M.

Honestly, I was tempted.

Julian didn’t love me. I knew he would never marry me.

I said I would think it over carefully because, at the time, I was still clinging to the fantasy that my years of devotion might earn me a sliver of Julian’s affection.

But it was also that night that truly made me despair and solidify my decision to leave.

"Cecilia Caldwell, did he touch you?" That night, Julian was drunk, like a madman.

I wrapped my arms around myself and didn’t answer.

"I asked you a question!" He went ballistic, kicking the coffee table and glaring at me furiously.

Terrified, I shook my head, tears streaming down my face.

"I’m telling you, Cecilia Caldwell, you are forbidden to see him again! You hear me?" He yanked my hair, threatening that I was not to see any man other than him.

I nodded in fear, but he refused to let me go.

He stared at me with loathing, his eyes filled with disgust.

"Julian... I wasn’t the one who told your mother I... I wanted to marry you. It was her! She said we were engaged and asked me..." I began to grow afraid as I looked into his eyes.

I tried desperately to explain.

Because Brian Morgan had ripped my shirt buttons open, the ruined fabric slid down past my shoulders.

I was completely soaked, and in that moment, I must have looked utterly filthy and cheap.

He seemed to get angry again. He picked up a liquor bottle from the table and poured it over my head. "You’re so filthy. Go on, wash up."

I squeezed my eyes shut in fear, letting him humiliate me.

I kept telling myself over and over that I owed him.

’Tonight, the debt will be cleared.’

’Tomorrow, I’ll apply for that study abroad program.’

’I’m leaving.’

I thought he would let me go once he’d had his fill of humiliating me, but instead, as if possessed, he grabbed my chin and kissed me.

’I thought he’d find me filthy.’

Every time, he acted disgusted with me, yet he never passed up an opportunity to torment me.

He took me right there in the club’s private room... completely ignoring how I felt.

"Julian, I’m begging you, can we please just go home?"

I begged and pleaded, but it was no use.

When a waiter pushed the door open and walked in, I instinctively shrank into his arms, terrified beyond measure.

In that instant, I felt it too—that I was dirty, cheap, and despicable.

"Get out!" Julian roared furiously.

The terrified waiter quickly shut the door.

But I’ll never forget the look in that waiter’s eyes—as if he were looking at a cheap prostitute.

"Julian!" I screamed through my tears, slapping him across the face. "Why are you treating me like this! What on earth did I do wrong?"

"What did you do wrong? Erin is still lying in the hospital, and you ask what you did wrong? Why don’t you just die!" he demanded, seizing my jaw.