Chapter 489: Game Mechanics

The massive game of Blothopoly went on, grinding down the players in a marathon session of that lasted for days. Snacks and food were brought in, and hasty trips for relief from too many sweet, fizzy drinks could be taken, but the snails kept them on a tight schedule. Slowly, each player felt themselves becoming exhausted. The two dwarves felt it the least, their toughness and racial traits giving them an advantage. The snails didn't put out a lot of energy, but Milo saw that most of them were taking small naps, withdrawing into their shells, only to emerge quickly when the shouting started. Min, like the dwarves, was barely affect. Butch less so as well, his gnomish toughness helping a bit. But Belinda and everyone else was barely functioning as the next day wore on. The second time Gendifur arrived to take the girls off for nap time, the weary players and snail judges agreed that naps were good and regular breaks would be taken whenever the two little girls went off with their mama.

Milo had also been taking small naps, along with nibbles of cheese now and then. He wasn't in the game any longer, but he had a huge amount of work to do and wanted to observe every move and interaction. The pace of the game was changing as each phase brought something new. And now, the first thing that had to be resolved each turn were the roving packs of sentient gator people looking for their next meal. Nearly everyone suffered, either losing their businesses to rampaging gator hordes, or to the taxes they had to pay for to the merchant associations for protection. The players that thrived in this situation were Boom-Boom and Narwal. They lost people holding up their deal with Milo to defend the Ratkin tribes, but after that they were in huge demand by every player and NPC organization on the board. Charging triple their normal fees, they recovered nicely, trained new people, and had their reputation upgraded. Rosie and Buttercup were unharmed by the gators. The newly sentient creatures recognized them, and accepted cookies each day from the cookie shop, even defending it against starving hordes during the food riots that occurred regularly in the Slave Section.

Next, NPC factories began appearing in many places on the board. If a player owned the indicated land, they either took the offer, or had to take a draw from the "Minor Setbacks" deck each round. The three times this happened, the players took the generous offer. Only Boom-Boom refused to give up the dwarven brew house he opened in the Foreign Sector, declaring it to be a matter of pride. He endured ten rounds of "Bad Luck" which in some cases turned out to be not so bad. A tax penalty was annoying, but having a group of Bully Boys invade his bar was ruled to be entertainment as far as his customers were concerned. At the end of ten rounds, dice were rolled by the snails, and he was told by the judges that the offer was now tripled and included a new building for his tavern. The alternative was drawing each round from the "Someone Powerful Wants You Dead" deck. He took the offer and moved, but it was a near thing. Belinda did well buying up very cheap properties in parts of the city where she saw there was enough room for the large factories to be placed. Taking the initial offers each time, she bought more and more such properties and was building a large collection of real estate.

The remaining members of the alphabet, battered by the gator attacks, joined forces and concentrated on Zander's factory and his Ur-Khemyst connections. The large new factories needed vast quantities of basic chemicals. They worked to expand their operation and focus on those basic products, but funneled 50% of their profits into upgrading the research laboratory, hoping for a good pull from the 'Scientific Breakthrough' deck. Zander disappointed them, finding new recipes that while slightly profitable, weren't going gain their Ur-Khemyst the fame he needed to climb the ladder. Indestructible Chew Toys sold well, but made only a small profit. The next invention, a potion that cured Gout but gave the patient explosive flatulence was a failure until Algernon declared that they weren't going to mention the Gout cure, and declare that the potion was too offensive to be sold to anyone. The snails laughed at this, conferred, and declared that the rules for Annoying Enemies and Friends from Update 25 applied to the new product. The formula and all of their potions were purchased anonymously by a Noble house and their Ur-Khemyst climbed up the ladder by thirty-four positions. There after, the alphabet ignored the Profitable Inventions deck, and pulled from Dangerous and Experimental deck.

The game went on and on, with new things added each phase that made the game more and more difficult to stay ahead of. Any connections to Noble Houses and Ur-Khemyst societies became very important. Running profitable businesses less so, as it almost felt like they made you a target. But money was still needed, especially to spend as bribes. On the third day, the players were in full retreat and no longer attacking each other. No one had attained a high enough position to have enough influence in the right places. They now supported each other against the game, but still saw their resources dwindling under the staggering burdens of taxation and dealing with an increasingly powerful bureaucracy. At the end of Round 100, the snails erupted in laughter and cheering.

"Such a Game!"

"Magnificent!"

"A surprise strategy at the end, backs to the wall and holding off disaster."

"Set up the pieces, lets play again!!!"

"We declare the Cookie Conglomerate to be the winners, since they have managed to keep their business intact and slightly profitable."

Everyone looked at them in surprise, Butch was the first to say, "What do you mean it's over? And why all the cheering? None of us has much more than what we started with!"

Number One moved forward, with all the other snails forming up behind him. "You survived! That is the best you can hope for in Blothopoly, and to do it for the full 100 rounds is amazing. But there is no need to go further. You don't have the resources to survive the next things that will happen. I would begin each full round by pulling from the 'Major Shit is Happening' decks. Very fun events like Let's have a Surprise War!, Sanctions Against Gadobhra, or Let's Insult the Spider Clans. But you did very good for your first game. I declare a full rest period for all players while we set up the next game. Be warned! We won't be using beginner rules like we did for this game."

The players all stood and began to talk at once, but Belinda whistled loudly, something that surprised the snails, who hadn't known humans had a way to make a 'scream of outrage'. "Ok, look, no sense talking about things here. Time for real food, rest, and bath time. I'm sure our snail buddies need time to prepare the next game." As soon as they were two floors away and out of earshot she declared, "Food first, and let's put our heads together on this. I want to kick this games ass."

Milo had the room to himself, except for the snails slowly moving over the game board, resorting the piles of chits, and randomly placing the different starting buildings on the board for the next game. Milo's contribution to this was taking the three boxes of components for the 'easy to medium' rules and placing them where the snails could add them to the game. Other wooden boxes were stenciled with the words 'Sort of Hard', 'Hard and Nasty' and 'Hardcore Bloth'. He added those to his research into the game's mechanics, which he was suspecting of being a reflection of the city itself.

Beginning with Game Update #1, he began to read through all of the supplemental rules. Some addressed loopholes in the game, or ways to negotiate situations where the rules contradicted themselves. This wasn't uncommon, and it felt like each new update was tacked on without a comprehensive review of how it affected the prior changes. The use of words and writing style was also inconsistent, leading him to think different people were writing these updates. This was confirmed in Update #57 to 60, where the rules flip-flopped back and forth with notations like "Returning to the REAL rules, not the idiot interpretation." Update #61 had a compromise between the two variant rules, and also some new twists that could happen if anyone opened a pretzel factory.

The tower had been searched top to bottom, as had the refuse piles outside where shipments had been dumped when Number Thirteen quit responding to polite knocks on his door. There were also warnings with any update over #300 that his subscription would run out at #1000 and wouldn't it be a great time to renew. The other curious things that had been found were a series of four official looking scrolls in ornate tubes. The first asked for a formal meeting to discuss the harvesting of nearby resources and asking for permission to do business with the Myconian city. The next said the same, but was also a reminder that there was significant profits not being made, and potential customers being ignored. The third was an intent to do business and asked for a discussion of profit sharing.

The last was much longer, acknowledging the number of times Number Thirteen had yelled in the grand council meetings: "I've half a mind to leave for good, and ignore you idiots forever." Using that as a legal basis, a group of investors were agreeing with his desire to be left alone and would be taking over resources in the are of the Myconian city. He wasn't surprised that one of the resources was the Myconians themselves, as customers, a work force, and a source of material for alchemical manipulation and improvement. They acknowledged that Number Thirteen had once developed these markets, and that 20% of all profits would be invested for him in Blothmazdan, and he only had to return, prove who he was, file all appropriate paperwork, and meet other standard requirements to claim his funds. The list of standard requirements was seven pages long and referred to still more arcane procedures. Milo read through the language several times, letting it sink into his memory. He also made a mental reminder to check over some of his business contracts in the real world for parallel situations.

After reading through all of the game updates, supplemental material, and rules manuals, he took a short break from the game room, and retreated to the real world. Belinda was eating with Mama, Big Butch, and the smaller children. He was warmly greeted as he came in and food was put in front of him. He was so hungry that he finished the first plate not noticing what he had eaten and had to ask what it was.

Mama wasn't surprised at all, and simply refilled his plate. "This is called chicken fried steak with biscuits and gravy. Plus fresh carrots from the garden, but cooked with walnuts and raisins in a maple glaze."

Milo looked up from his second plateful. "It's good." Starting on his third plate, he was slowing down. Belinda took advantage of that to get his attention. "This isn't just an incredibly complex and hellish boardgame, is it?"

"Nope. I think it's a training manual."

"For who? Snails?"

He shook his head. "They were just the only people Number Thirteen had left to talk to. Imagine having to bioengineer creatures to have someone to play games with. I think that the game is used to train young nobles from the various houses on the way the city works. Everything that's in those rules and updates is something that's happened in the city. Might even be their laws. But certainly their way of doing business."

Her face went blank for a moment, then she scowled, "But that would mean the city is a shithole. Worse than that. That game is hellish and it felt like the rules were designed to grind down our will to play. And we were playing with the beginner rules set!"

He grinned at her. "And you still want to play."

"Damned right I do. I'll beat the damn game if I have to play for a year. If other people can beat it, so can I. Especially if we all work together."

Milo nodded, "And I think that many of the people that go Bloth think that too. It's a refuge for cutthroat's and outcasts from all over. They deal in slaves and misery, selling to all the evil places in the Deep Dark, and some on the surface like Fort Hopeless. I thought Shadowport was bad at first, but it's actually quite a fun place after you've been there a bit."

Belinda nodded, "If we ever get a break, we should go back there and start another gang war and take over. I haven't gotten to bop players on the head in too long."

Milo agreed, "It is fun...but it seems like whenever I get involved in something, things spin out of control."

"You're right. How about we cause trouble in Bloth then?"

Milo grinned evilly at her. "Don't mention it to the others, but that's exactly what I'm planning to do. But I need to do some scouting first, and get some contingency plans set up. I need to find someone in there and rescue them. After that...well, after that will depend on just what I find there. I need to know what we're dealing with. But you know the saying about poking the bear."

"When are you leaving then? And what do you need help with?"

"Well, first off, I need to type up a few hundred pages of reworked game mechanics and have Rusty look them over. I'd like to streamline all the optional rules and create a better Blothopoly. Think it would sell?"

She laughed, "Are you kidding? People pay a ton for games that offer that kind of challenge and punishment. Although....I'd market it as a corporate training tool first. Why sell a thousand dollar boardgame when you can sell "Training Retreats" for ten-thousand dollars a head for a three day training session? Once you have it set up, I'll send information to Technodyne, ACME, and Alchemarx and line up four people from each. I'll set up an area in Manpower for the game itself, and let Butch and Brad be the referees with Rusty handling all the rules for them behind the scenes.

Rusty chimed in from a speaker, alerted as soon as him name had been spoken. "I'm in! I don't know what I'm doing, but it sounds like fun!"

Milo stood up, "I'd best start typing up the revised edition then, for you two to go over. Then I'm off to go through every book and set of lab notes in that tower. If I'm going to Bloth, I want to be prepared."

She smiled at him, "Knowing the rules and mechanics of the game are half the battle. The other half is cheating and winning. Something your good at."