Chapter 50: Bitter Memories

I stood before the Grand Duke... and intended to kneel before him in accordance with protocol, despite my lack of interest; this was also something I’d never done in my life, so I found it strange, but I didn’t want to make a bad impression on my first official assignment. To my surprise, however, the Grand Duke took hold of my shoulders and embraced me

I froze in my tracks, bewildered... and a little panicked.

What on earth is wrong with this man who’s suffering from a split personality?

"Stay safe,"

he said to me in a flat tone, then left me and stepped down from the podium, heading towards his entourage.

I don’t know why, but I hate this.

"I’ll do... father"

Let’s provoke him a little

And it seems I succeeded because he stopped in his tracks like a statue, even though he didn’t turn to look at me... Hmm, maybe I shouldn’t have done that

I know he won’t like hearing that word from me

Forget it

Whether he likes it or not, why should I care?

I ignored him and turned my back on him too...

Couldn’t this man simply have followed protocol? Why is he leaving me in such an awkward position on my very first mission? Doesn’t he know I’m as nervous as any rookie because of him? Because all my life he’s always stopped me from going to the battlefield

I looked at my soldiers, with their fearsome faces, staring at me as I stood alone on the podium

like an abandoned son. I’ve always been introverted since I was a child and have never before been involved in any of the affairs of state. So, despite all the lessons I’ve taken and all the training I’ve received, I didn’t know how to begin delivering a proper speech when I’d never done it before... . Well, let’s just improvise – it’s not as if it’s the end of the world

I put aside the embarrassment the Grand Duke had caused me and stood on the podium with my hands behind my back. When I really couldn’t think of anything to say, I remembered a sentence I’d read in a novel, so I recited it with a serious expression

"Think of yourselves however makes you feel comfortable, whether you believe yourselves to be mere puppets or victims, or knights of glory or heroes, or simply men protecting their homes and doing their duty... I really don’t care, and death doesn’t care, and history doesn’t care, because even if it remembers you, it will remember you as mere numbers, whether in disgrace or glory. So whether you like it or hate it, whether you achieve glory or are drowned in shame... I don’t care, and nobody cares. I have a mission to fulfil, and I shall fulfil it, and you shall do so with me, whether we all turn to mummified ice in a desolate land or return victorious."

All the knights and soldiers raised their weapons and shouted with one voice

"Order carried out!"

"Glory to the North!"

"Glory to Korvekar!"

Tsk... a bunch of masochists...

But it seems to have worked. Hmph, come and see, you fool Roman—what did he say to me last time? ’Read some useless rubbish.’ His head’s the useless one...

"Wow, I didn’t expect my little brother to be so good at pep talks,"

said the stupidRolan Sturan, riding towards me on his tamed monster horse, looking pleased with himself, with a beautiful black cat with long fur sitting on his shoulder, grooming its paws. He stopped right beneath the podium.

Is this the time for this, you fool? Did he have to interfere? Can’t he see we’re in the midst of a dramatic pre-battle scene? What is he doing here anyway!

"What are you doing here?" I asked him as I stepped down from the podium.

"I’ll be accompanying you."

"I heard you’d gone south?"

"Well, as you can see, I’m no ghost, nor am I in the south either. Unfortunately for both of us, we’re heading in roughly the same direction, so I’ll be accompanying you."

What an oddball!

Let’s just ignore him—it’s not as if he’s come to see me off.

I signalled to Vilen to bring me my horse. As he is merely an ordinary servant in the palace, the furthest he will accompany me is to the border, after which he will return. From that point onwards, my first escort, the knight Saveli, will take over as my personal servant, whilst my second escort, the knight Nikandr, will act as my guard

As for Nikandr, he is a Requiem knight and is, by custom and by right, the commander of my personal guard knight; whilst Saveli’s role—also a Requiem knight—is that of my escort, and his task is to stand around me like a statue and stick his nose into my private affairs, just as Vilen usually does.

Oh, as for the maids I mentioned earlier, they cannot be considered mere maids; rather, they originally belong to the logistics unit responsible for food preparation, nursing, cleaning and even organisation, and it is certainly part of their duties to ensure the army commander’s comfort as well, since most army commanders are nobles who are accustomed to having people serve them even unto death and whilst they sleep.

Let’s go...

To the sound of the trumpet, the gate opened and the procession began...

After leaving the castle gates and whilst passing through the capital city, Rolan suddenly slipped up beside me and took his place on my right with complete ease

?????

I looked at him, bewildered, but he ignored me completely as he asked me

"Will you be stopping at any of the forts or castles on the way to the Gorny Krai?"

"It’s none of your business."

He looked at me intently for a moment, but I just ignored him and walked past him. However, he caught up with me and asked, sounding a bit taken aback

"Hold on, are you angry?"

Well, this might sound crazy, but yes, I’m angry with him. Because of him, I feel terribly embarrassed. I’ve attacked this bastard twice, and I reckon he’s a ghost. I’m sure everyone working at the castle is laughing at me now and calling me mad.

"man, you’ve literally nearly killed me three times,"

He made false and baseless claims, but I kept ignoring him. He sighed, then changed his tactics, the bastard.

"Look, OK, I don’t know what your problem is, but don’t forget that you’re just the temporary commander of a special unit in the Northern Army, whilst I’m the Deputy Commander-in-Chief of the entire Korvekar Army, which means I’m your commander, brother."

I looked at him with contempt, and at his clothes; unlike me, who was dressed entirely in white, his outfit consisted of white armour with a red cloak – essentially signifying the Korvekar Joint Forces, who work to organise and coordinate the Northern and Western Armies

Although I wanted to defy him further, let’s not cause any more trouble; otherwise, he might use his authority to make things harder for me. Truly, noble families are wretched—can’t he just support me like any decent older brother would?

"The Grand Duke didn’t tell me to do that, so I wanted to lead the march to Černograd Fortress, between the capital province of Varyesk and the province of Gorny-Krai. From there, I’ll use the teleportation gate to reach the northern border directly, to Starigrad Fortress."

"That’s fine too... If you face any difficulties managing your soldiers, consult the Requiem Knights whom Father entrusted to you. As far as I know, there’s a female knight among them called Elena; she once served under my command and is good at organisation."

Thus our conversation ended, and an awkward silence fell. Although I felt the urge to get back into the carriage, I felt too embarrassed to do so.

Even I have enough common sense to realise that this is wrong and an unsatisfactory situation as the commander of these fearsome men behind me, some of whom are even travelling on foot...

But on the other hand, as an introvert who’s only ever ventured out into the outside world for fun, and who’s always been accompanied by people I know and who’ve worked directly under my command for years, let’s just say that my dread at the realisation that there were over a thousand men behind me staring at me made me feel like shit...

And why do I feel that the name of that female knight sounds like the name of the first person to die in any novel, just to illustrate how terrible the world is? Let’s keep our distance from her.

"How’s your training going?"

I snapped out of my reverie at Rolan’s question

"Fine."

"Have you done anything about your domain weapon?"

"Nope. That cheeky old bloke trained me just once, and I haven’t seen him since."

"..."

"..."

....

"...."

"..."

I turned to him in frustration, but found him busy with his cat...

If he had nothing to say, why bother me in the first place? Was he mocking me? Was he bullying me just because we were outside the house?...

Wait a minute, why doesn’t he seem in the mood to bully me? The last time I went to the Imperial Capital four years ago, this man abandoned me, leaving me lost in the streets of that terrifying city for three days because I didn’t know the way home, forcing me to sleep rough

It was so terrifying that I bought an inn just to find a place to sleep. and in the morning I had to face the terrifying guests. But luckily, the owner took charge and gave me what he called the manager’s room upstairs so I could rest and be free from the hassle. So I paid him two gold pieces for his services...

It really was terrifying and disgusting at the time. Imagine, the bed was barely big enough for me to sleep lying straight, and when I stretched out my arms, they hung over the sides! Even though I was literally just a twelve-year-old boy at the time...