Chapter 282: Before It Was Too Late

Ivan stared at the parchment in his hands.

More than an hour had passed, but he had barely written anything.

The same few lines remained in front of him.

He had read them so many times that he no longer knew what they said.

His mind was somewhere else.

Irina’s words kept coming back to him.

He should let Lydia go.

He knew she was right.

Perhaps that was what Lydia needed.

She deserved a chance to be happy without him. She deserved a man who would not hurt her the way he had. Someone who could give her the peace and security he had failed to give her.

And now there was Damir.

Ivan lowered his eyes.

Damir had asked Lydia to marry him.

Perhaps that was the better choice for her.

He should let her go.

He had told himself that many times.

But every time he imagined Lydia with another man, something inside him twisted painfully.

He remembered the way she had looked at him the night before.

The way she had cried in his arms.

The way she had held onto him as though she was afraid he would disappear.

And then he remembered her words.

She had asked him to promise that he would never leave her again.

Ivan closed his eyes.

Maybe it was her plea that kept him from walking away.

Or perhaps it was simply his own selfish desire to keep her.

He wanted her.

He wanted his wife beside him.

He wanted to wake up beside her every morning and hold her at night.

But wanting her did not erase what he had done.

Ivan looked toward the window.

The sun was slowly disappearing from the sky.

The room became darker as the light faded.

He thought about telling Lydia the truth.

Perhaps if he explained everything, she would understand.

Perhaps she would finally know that leaving her had never been as simple as she believed.

Perhaps she would understand why he had made the decisions he made.

But another part of him was afraid.

What if the truth only hurt her more?

What if she hated him even more after hearing it?

Ivan leaned back in his chair.

Everything felt like too much.

He looked at the setting sun.

The sky was becoming darker, but the trouble in his heart was not.

He had no idea what he was supposed to do anymore.

---

Lydia paced around her room.

She had been doing it for several minutes.

She would walk toward the window, turn around, then walk back.

Her thoughts kept returning to her conversation with Irina.

Because I still love him.

She had finally admitted it.

There was no point hiding from the truth anymore.

She loved Ivan.

And she was carrying his child.

He had to know.

Tonight.

She could not keep putting it off.

No more waiting.

No more finding excuses.

Lydia stopped in the middle of the room and took a deep breath.

"I’ll tell him."

She nodded to herself.

"I’ll tell him tonight."

A knock came at the door.

Lydia turned.

"Come in."

Xena entered.

"Your Highness, dinner is ready."

Lydia barely heard her.

"Where is His Highness?"

Xena looked surprised by the question.

"I believe he is in his study."

"When did you last see him there?"

"About half an hour ago, I think."

Lydia immediately turned toward the door.

"Thank you."

She started walking.

Xena blinked.

"Your Highness, what about dinner?"

But Lydia was already leaving.

She didn’t hear her.

She moved quickly through the hallway.

Her heart was beating faster with every step.

Tonight.

She was going to tell him.

She didn’t know what would happen afterward.

She didn’t know if Ivan would be happy or angry.

She didn’t know if he would believe her.

But she couldn’t keep living with the fear.

She had to give him the chance to decide what he wanted.

---

Tatiana was barely holding herself together.

She paced around her room, her hands constantly moving toward her mouth.

She bit her nails again.

And again.

Until the skin around them became sore.

Yelena watched her with worry.

"My lady, please calm down."

Tatiana ignored her.

She continued walking.

"What if she tells him?"

Yelena stood quietly.

Tatiana stopped.

"What if she tells him before tonight?"

"My lady, you already have a plan."

"I know."

Tatiana looked at her hands.

They were trembling.

"I know."

Yelena stepped closer.

"You need to calm down."

Tatiana shook her head.

"I can’t."

She started pacing again.

"She cannot tell him."

Yelena tried to reassure her.

"Everything will be fine."

Tatiana suddenly turned toward her.

"How can you say that?"

Yelena fell silent.

Tatiana’s breathing was uneven.

"If Ivan finds out about the baby, everything changes."

She pressed her hands against her head.

"I can’t let that happen."

Yelena had nothing else to say.

Tatiana had never looked this frightened before.

---

Lydia reached Ivan’s study.

She stopped outside the door.

Her heart was pounding.

She took a breath and knocked.

Nothing.

She waited.

Then knocked again.

Still nothing.

Lydia frowned.

She placed her hand on the door and slowly opened it.

"Ivan?"

The study was empty.

She looked around.

The parchment was still on his desk, along with the other documents he had been working on.

But Ivan was nowhere to be seen.

Lydia’s heart sank.

Where was he?

She quickly turned around and headed toward his chambers.

Maybe he had gone there.

She walked quickly down the hallway.

Then she almost collided with someone.

"Your Highness."

Lydia looked up.

Boris stood in front of her.

"I was actually on my way to your chambers."

He smiled.

"I’m glad I found you."

Lydia barely responded.

Boris noticed immediately.

"Are you all right?"

She nodded.

"Yes."

But she was clearly distracted.

Boris looked at her carefully.

"Are you looking for His Highness?"

Lydia nodded again.

"I have something to tell him."

Boris’s expression softened.

"Then you came at the wrong time."

Lydia’s face changed.

"What do you mean?"

"His Highness left the palace not long ago."

Lydia stared at him.

"He left?"

Boris nodded.

"I don’t know where he went. He didn’t tell me."

Lydia’s heart sank.

"What happened?"

"He only said he needed some time to think."

Boris shrugged.

"You know how he is."

Lydia remained silent.

Boris noticed the worry growing on her face.

"Don’t worry."

He smiled.

"I’m sure he isn’t visiting some mistress."

Lydia looked at him.

Boris chuckled.

"That was a joke."

He raised his hands.

"He’s probably gone somewhere to deal with something important. I’m sure he’ll be back soon."

Lydia gave a small nod.

"Thank you."

Boris watched her.

She looked disappointed.

He had expected her to be relieved after learning that Ivan had simply left to think.

Instead, she looked worried.

Lydia turned toward the hallway.

She had wanted to tell him tonight.

She had finally found the courage to do it.

And now he was gone.

She placed a hand against her stomach.

She hoped he was all right.

That was all she could think about.

She did not care where he had gone.

She only wanted him to come back safely.

Lydia looked toward the windows at the end of the hallway.

The last light of the setting sun was disappearing.

"Ivan..."

Her voice was barely a whisper.

"Please come back soon."

She stood there for another moment before slowly turning away.

She still intended to tell him.

She just hoped she would get the chance.