Chapter 462: Help Me Take A Bath

Every head snapped toward the small centaur.

Mavis, who had been trying to make herself as small as possible, froze like a deer caught in torchlight.

"While everyone has some degree of stench." Luca continued hesitantly. "I don’t want to say this, but...you probably have it the most. After all, you work in a workshop with a furnace running every single day. You sweat the most. And while working with you..."

He grimaced.

"I could definitely smell your stench."

"ENOUGH!" Mavis’s voice cracked like a whip. "Enough! You don’t need to say another word!"

She pointed at him with a trembling finger.

"I swear on every ancestor I have, if you say ONE MORE WORD about my stench, I will chase you around this village with my hammer until one of us drops dead!"

Luca wisely fell silent and the crowd, for its part, did not laugh. Even Riley, who lived to tease Mavis kept her mouth firmly shut.

This was not the time for jokes. This was a sensitive issue, and everyone knew it.

Which somehow made it worse for Mavis. The pitying silence. The averted eyes. The way nobody would even look at her, as if acknowledging her presence might somehow make the smell worse.

She was the smallest centaur in the village. And apparently, she was also the stinkiest.

Fantastic!

Luca, seeing the look on Mavis’s face, decided it was time for a strategic retreat.

"Alright!" He announced, clapping his hands. "That’s enough excitement for one night! Everyone go home and get some sleep. I’ll start working on the project first thing tomorrow morning. But for now—sleep. Rest. And try not to think about...you know...the smell thing."

The crowd reluctantly began to disperse. The mothers gathered up their daughters—though not without some resistance.

"Come here, sweetie." One of the mothers said, reaching for her little filly. "Let Mama hold you."

"Why?" The filly asked suspiciously.

"No reason! Just...maternal affection!"

"You’re trying to rub my smell onto you, aren’t you?"

"What? No! That’s ridiculous!"

"You ARE! You want my bakery smell to cover up your stinky smell!"

Similar scenes were playing out across the clearing. Nella was actively fleeing from Claudia, her tiny hooves kicking up dust.

"No, Mama! Stay back! You’re too stinky!"

"Nella! I am your MOTHER!"

"A stinky mother! I want to stay with the nice-smell group!"

"You’re breaking my heart, Nella!"

"Your heart smells too!"

Meanwhile, Thea had a different approach.

"My lady." She said to Poppy, who was still perched on her back. "Would you mind holding onto me a little tighter?"

Poppy blinked. "Why? Are you cold, Thea?"

"Yes. Very cold. Freezing, in fact. Please hug me as tightly as possible."

"Of course!" Poppy wrapped her arms around Thea’s neck and squeezed with all her might. "I’ll keep you warm, Thea! That’s what queens do!"

Thea closed her eyes, soaking in Poppy’s honey-and-wildflower scent.

"Thank you, my lady. You’re too kind."

"I know! I’m the kindest queen in the whole continent!"

—

Soon, the training ground was empty and Luca walked toward Sigrid, ready to climb onto her back as usual—

But she backed away.

"...Sigrid?"

She wouldn’t meet his eyes.

"Tonight...you should go home by yourself."

"What?" Luca was baffled. "Why?"

She fiddled with her fingers, her voice barely a whisper.

"I don’t want you to smell my stink. Not tonight. Not after what you said."

"Sigrid, I’ve been sitting on your back for days. I’m used to your smell. I actually like—"

"GOODNIGHT, SIR LUCA!"

And she was gone. Galloping into the darkness like the hounds of hell were at her heels.

Luca stood alone in the empty training ground, the bonfire dying at his back, the stars wheeling overhead.

He had been abandoned. Rejected. Left to walk home by himself like some sort of commoner.

He let out a long sigh. "Fine. I guess I’ll just go back to the elf village. At least my wives appreciate me."

He opened a portal, stepped through—

—and was immediately greeted by a scream.

"AAAAAAHHHHH!"

Luca jumped back, his heart hammering. "What?! What is it?!"

"THE CLOWN!" Lulu shrieked, pointing at the massive screen that had been set up in the village square. "THE CLOWN IS IN THE SEWER AND HE’S GOING TO—" She buried her face in her hands. "I CAN’T WATCH!"

All around the square, dozens of elves were huddled together on cushioned seats, clutching popcorn and candy with tight grips.

A projector, one of Luca’s gifts from his world was throwing a horror movie onto the screen.

"RUN." Shrieked the entire village at once. "RUN, HE’S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!"

"Why are they splitting up?" Lulu demanded, both hands on her belly. "Why do always split up? Every single time, the humans split up!"

"Because they’re stupid." Said Nyx, shoveling popcorn into her mouth with real venom. "They’re genetically stupid. All of them. I hope my child doesn’t inherit that stupidity."

Luca spotted Leona in the front row, her pregnant belly resting comfortably in her lap.

"Leona, my darling!" He slid into the seat beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I’ve returned. Did you miss me—"

"Shh!" Leona hissed, not taking her eyes off the screen. "The seer is about to find the clown’s lair!"

"Wha—But I’m your husband. I’ve been gone all day. Don’t you want to—"

"Luca, I love you, but if you don’t be quiet right now, I will divorce you."

Luca stared at her in horror. "You’ll...divorce me?"

But Leona just ignored him and gasped at the screen,

"The clown is RIGHT THERE, Luca! LOOK AT THE CLOWN!"

On screen, the clown was doing something unspeakable with a balloon animal.

"Fine." Luca muttered, slumping in his seat. "I’ll just sit here. Quietly. By myself."

"Good." Leona said, already reabsorbed in the movie.

Luna, seated on his other side, patted his knee absently.

"We still love you, Luca. But...we just love the clown more right now."

"More than me?!"

"Shhh! The clown is monologuing!"

Luca sat in silence for approximately thirty seconds before letting out another long, mournful sigh.

"Nobody appreciates me." He muttered. "I’m the Hero of the Demi-Human Continent. I saved all of you from extinction. I and you’re choosing a fictional clown over me."

"Luca." Leona said, not looking at him. "I love you more than life itself, but if you don’t stop talking, I’m going to throw this popcorn at your head."

"Fine. I know when I’m not wanted."

He stood up, opened another portal, and stepped back into the cold, dark, centaur-less night.

"I’ll just go to bed."

He announced to no one in particular, trudging toward the small house the centaurs had set aside for him.

"Sleep it off. Wake up tomorrow and build a bathhouse. Because apparently that’s my life now. Building bathhouses for horse women who won’t even let me ride them anymore."

He was still muttering to himself—something about how he was "taken for granted" and "nobody understands the burdens of a harem protagonist"—when he heard it.

Hoofbeats.

Fast ones. Coming straight toward him.

Luca turned just in time to see a small, silver-haired figure emerge from the darkness at full gallop. She skidded to a halt in front of him, kicking up a cloud of dust, her chest heaving, her face set with a kind of desperate determination.

"Mavis?"

"Get on." She said urgently.

"...What?"

"I said GET ON, Dummy Hero!" She stamped her hoof. "On my back! Now!"

Luca stared at her. Then at her back—the small, pony-sized back that was maybe half the width of Sigrid’s. Then back at her face, which was rapidly turning the color of a ripe tomato.

"Mavis." He said slowly. "You told me, in no uncertain terms, that you would never let me ride you. You said—"

"I KNOW WHAT I SAID! Just—" She gritted her teeth. "Just get on, okay? Please? I’m already humiliated enough as it is. Don’t make me beg."

"But why? What happened? Is something wrong?"

"Nothing’s wrong! Nothing except the fact that I’m the STINKIEST CENTAUR IN THE VILLAGE and I can’t sleep knowing I smell like a forge fire and three days of sweat!"

She was practically vibrating with frustration.

"I need your help, dummy hero. And I need it now. So please, for the love of all the ancestors, just GET ON MY BACK."

Luca looked at her back. It was significantly smaller than Sigrid’s, more like a pony than a warhorse.

"Can you even carry me?" He asked gently.

Mavis’s eyes flashed. "I may be small, but I’m still a centaur! I have more than enough strength to carry one annoying human! Now stop asking questions and—"

"Alright, alright." Luca raised his hands in surrender. "I’m getting on."

He approached her slowly, mindful of how tense her body was. When he placed his hands on her back, she flinched, just enough that he could feel it.

He realised in that moment this was new for her. She had never let anyone ride her before. Never.

But she didn’t pull away. She didn’t tell him to stop.

Luca swung himself onto her back as gently as he could. The moment he settled, he felt the difference immediately.

Sigrid was a war machine—solid, powerful, built for charging into battle without hesitation.

Mavis was something else entirely. Smaller. Softer. Her body was rounder, less hardened by combat, and the fur beneath him was impossibly silky.

She felt less like a tank and more like a classic car that you wanted to handle with care.

Meanwhile, Mavis was burning.

Her face was so red she was glad he couldn’t see it. Because something in a centaur’s tradition ran very deep, and she had just done the thing that meant something.

’I’ve let him mount me. I’ve let a man mount me. Whatever happens from here, the covenant is formed, and I did it on purpose, and I didn’t even hesitate.’

"Hold on tight." She managed through gritted teeth.

Luca’s arms wrapped around her. And somehow, in the process, one of his hands ended up resting directly on her chest.

Mavis’s eye twitched. "What the hell do you think you’re doing, Dummy Hero?!"

"Holding on tight." Luca said innocently. "You told me to."

"I didn’t mean—you know exactly what you’re—"

"You’re the one who told me to get on. I’m just following orders."

Mavis swore under her breath, but she didn’t have the energy to fight him. Not tonight. So she just started running.

And running with Luca on her back was...different.

Every stride sent a ripple of sensation through her body. She could feel him shifting with her movements, his weight adjusting instinctively.

She could feel his thighs gripping her sides.

Most importantly, she could feel something else pressing against her lower back, something that was definitely not a dagger.

"Nope." She muttered to herself. "Not thinking about it. Absolutely not."

"You say something?" Luca asked.

"NOTHING! I SAID NOTHING!"

She ran faster.

They left the village behind, climbing into the highlands. The terrain grew wilder, the hills steeper, the night darker. Mavis navigated by memory and moonlight, weaving between rock formations and under natural arches, until finally she slowed.

They had arrived at a small, hidden spring.

It was nestled between three hills, invisible from any angle except directly above. The water was so clear that Luca could see the pebbles at the bottom, even in the moonlight.

Steam rose gently from the surface—not a hot spring, but warm enough to be comfortable. Wildflowers ringed the banks, their fragrance sweet on the cool night air.

Luca slid off Mavis’s back and took in the scene.

"This is...beautiful. I had no idea this was here."

"It’s my spot." Mavis said quietly. "Nobody else knows about it. I found it years ago, when I was looking for ore deposits."

She didn’t look at him. "I come here when I need to think. Or when I need to be alone."

Luca turned to her. "And you brought me here because...?"

Mavis didn’t answer with words. Instead, she reached into the satchel she’d been carrying and began to throw stuff at his feet one by one.

A long-handled brush, a smaller brush, a scrubbing stone, several cakes of what looked like crude soap.

The soaps were primitive compared to what existed in Luca’s world, made from some kind of fragrant wax mixed with crushed herbs, but they smelled pleasant enough.

Luca stared at the pile at his feet. Then at Mavis.

"What’s all this for?"

Mavis’s face was now roughly the color of a sunset. "It’s...it’s for..."

"Yes?"

"For a bath." She whispered.

"You want me to take a bath!?" Luca’s eyebrows shot up in offense. "Mavis, just because I told you all that you stink doesn’t mean I stink. I bathe twice a day. I smell fantastic. Go ahead—smell me. I dare you!"

"Not you, Dummy!" She burst out. "I’m not talking about you!"

He lowered his arm.

"...Then who?"

She was silent for a moment.

Then she pointed at herself.

"Me."

"..."

"I-I want you to help me take a bath." Her voice was tiny and furious. "Right now."