Chapter 51: Look at me

Noah’s POV

"Noah, it’s me..."

The familiar smell of clean musk and cedar surrounds me as Roman, the boy I grew up loving, hugs me.

"Hey, it’s okay, I won’t let him hurt you" Roman says in that voice of his. He sounds soft, warm and homey, but I’m craning my neck for Elias.

He’s comforting me, but I’m looking for the man who thrust me in this state.

Did I miss Roman? Yes.

Do I want my husband? Also, yes.

Something is wrong with me, and whatever is wrong with me is eating up my common sense and my soul like a disease.

"It’s okay, I’ve got you. Where did he hurt you?" Roman asks and I don’t have an answer.

I just stare at his face with my mouth open and my eyes wet.

My nose has forgotten how to breathe, and it has passed on the ability to my mouth.

Needing Elias after the gruesome one-sided conversation we just had should be the last thing on my mind, but the more Roman tries to calm me with his scent, the more I can only think of Elias and his colder scent.

"Roman...he’s going to kill you" I manage to say and Roman laughs softly as he wipes a stray tear off my cheek.

I used to lean into the touch of his thumb, but now I just want him to let me go. My omega is quietly rejecting the alpha we used to like.

"I didn’t train with the army for nothing, did I? Come on, look at me, what did he do to you?" he asks and tears blur my vision.

"Let’s just go in" I choke out and he scans my face.

"Is it because he has your city’s people as hostage?" the golden-haired man asks and I’m too ashamed to say my answer.

My answer is no.

And the answer is; no, it’s because I just need to be near Elias. I’m like a rock that would start to grow moss faster without a human presence.

Cold realization washes over me as I accept my reality, I need to be near Elias.

"Please" I whisper and Roman holds me by my elbow, releasing his scent some more for me.

"I’ll save you, okay? I’ll be there for you, I promise" he matches my whisper as he helps me into the building.

He takes me in and holds me even when talking to Elias and his brothers.

Someone is already dead. No, it’s two people. Two men are bleeding out on the floor, and no one is batting an eyelid, not even Roman’s mom.

The desire to throw up returns, but I don’t move.

Roman’s family and my husband’s family exchange words that fly over my head.

I refuse to pay attention to a conversation that has to do with human lives.

My eyes are glued to Elias Deus and he’s doing everything but looking at me.

Roman rubs his hand up and down my back, and when I come to the present, I see Elias walking out without calling for me.

Why is he giving me a cold shoulder after dumping the horrid reality of the world on me?

"Tomorrow Stiles" Damien gives a mocking salute, and without being told what to do, I step out of Roman’s arms.

He lets go and allows me to follow them without saying anything.

Lucas walks behind me, Damien is in front of me, and I can’t see the man who brought me here.

The walk back to the car we came in feels longer than it should, and when we get to the waiting car, Lucas takes the wheel.

"So?" Damien asks, folding his arms to address his middle brother.

"Does little gold get to sit in my lap since you’re fucking sulking"

"I don’t sulk" Elias says and Damien tilts his head to the side.

The bigger alpha raises a brow, and even though he’s not addressing me, I feel intimidated.

"Never repeat the move you pulled in there" he moves close to his younger brother, and Elias doesn’t physically budge, but I feel it.

The older Deus is speaking.

"Never repeat that again. He’s your omega, he wears your fucking ring and I don’t care what is going through your head, but you don’t leave your omega with people like that" Damien growls and Elias blanky stares at him.

The two alphas keep staring at each other in an icy cold clash until Kai coughs.

"Do I need to call our mom?" the youngest Deus asks and Elias opens the door.

The alpha doesn’t speak to me, but he gestures for me to get in.

Kai gets in on the other side, and I’m sandwiched between the brothers.

"Now that I’ve had my taste of my daily murder, can we fucking get breakfast?" Damien says in his happy-go-lucky tone.

"Starving for waffles" Lucas agrees.

"Burgers for breakfast" Kai murmurs in support.

"Noah? Hungry for anything that’s more filling than cold metal?" Damien asks and I look at Elias who’s by my side.

He’s still not looking at me and it’s starting to hurt my chest.

I want to understand him, I want to understand his family, and now he’s looking away from me.

Damien chose to take matters into his hands.

The man drags us to a cozy café for breakfast and made us hang around the city throughout the day.

The extroverted part of me enjoyed the sightseeing.

There were so many people, and most of them didn’t know who we were, so it felt freeing to just walk around and kick stones like kids with Lucas.

And while my extroverted side was having a good day, the married part of me kept sneaking glances at Elias.

He calls me a statue when he’s actually worse.

"Okay, fun time’s over. It’s my cumming time" Damien announces as soon the sun goes down over the city.

"For fuck sake" Kai and Lucas groan at the same time.

"Where are we sleeping tonight?" Kai asks.

How is it possible that we’ve been wandering aimlessly and there are no arrangements for where we’ll sleep?

"The hotel is booked. A room for everyone" Elias responds flatly and everyone but me breathe a sigh of relief.

"Thank fuck, I’m never sleeping in a car trunk again in my life" someone says, but I don’t pay attention to who it is.

Like I’ve done all day, I keep trying to get Elias to look at me.

Elias is very possessive; he can’t possibly have a separate room for me. He likes to watch me, he can’t possibly keep me away from himself, right?

Wrong.

His brothers and Lucas make their way to their rooms, and I stand in the hotel hallway like a lost child.

He heads for a door to open the room and I follow him; I only stop when he unlocks the door.

"Yes?" he asks, looking at me with no expression on his face.

"I’m going to bed"

"Your room" he points to a room two rooms away from his.

I should be happy, I should be freaking happy that I would be sleeping alone, but I’m not.

"No...but..." I start to stutter as Elias comes close to me.

The look on his face is intense, and I gulp as I look at him. I’m waiting and begging for him to do something...to touch me, grab me, or...just anything.

He closes the distance between us and takes a breath of my scent without touching the tip of his nose to my neck.

"Fuck" he swears before he moves away from me.

"Elias?"

"You smell like him" he snarls, turns around, and goes into the room.

I startle as he slams the door in my face. I lift my arm to my nose and blanch as I realize...I really smell like Roman.