Chapter 227: Making a Choice

Elara:

First, there was Reign Valemont. The very thought of him made my stomach twist in irritation.

I couldn’t deny that I was attracted to him. His touch that always made my skin tingle, his arrogance, his infuriating confidence, his teasing smile, and those ridiculously beautiful blue eyes had somehow managed to get under my skin. And then there was that kiss. No matter how much I hated admitting it, I still thought about it more often than I should.

I remembered how his lips had felt against mine, how easily I had forgotten to push him away, and how my own arms had wrapped around his neck instead. It was humiliating. But none of that changed the fact that Reign and I had no future together. Not with the plans he had in store for me, not with the way he kept pulling me into his games, and certainly not when I had no intention of becoming another piece on his political chessboard.

Whatever strange pull existed between us, whatever his brain might think, and however good a kisser he happened to be, I wasn’t going to let it decide my future. Reign was out. I had already kicked him out of the list, and I needed to keep him there.

Then there was Kairo Greymark. That one was even easier. Or at least, it should have been. Kairo and I had shared something far more intimate than a kiss, and for a while, I had genuinely believed there was something meaningful between us. But he had made his choice... or, at the very least, he had made it clear that he wasn’t willing to choose me.

Whatever secret he was hiding, whatever reason he had for pushing me away, I wasn’t going to spend my life waiting for him to decide whether I was worth the trouble. I had given him the opportunity to figure out what he wanted, and he had answered with silence and distance. I wasn’t going to chase him or keep a place open for him simply because my feelings hadn’t disappeared overnight. Kairo was out too.

Alaric Ravenshade was another matter. I couldn’t pretend I hadn’t noticed him, or that I didn’t feel attracted to him. There was something about that man that made him difficult to ignore, especially now that his behaviour toward me had changed so much from the beginning. But he had also been keeping his distance, and I wasn’t blind enough to mistake that distance for an invitation.

Whatever he felt - or didn’t feel - he certainly wasn’t making any effort to come closer. I wasn’t going to invent feelings on his behalf or convince myself that there was a possibility simply because I wanted there to be one. If Alaric had something to say, he could say it himself. Until then, I had no reason to keep considering him. As far as I was concerned, whatever attraction I felt toward him was mine to deal with, not something I needed to turn into a possibility.

That left two men.

Esme Ashbourne and Lorien Moonveil.

I slowly opened my eyes, looking at the man sitting beside me. Esme was still watching me, his expression patient and attentive. He hadn’t interrupted my silence or demanded to know what was going through my mind. He simply waited, giving me the same consideration he had shown me every time we were together.

My gaze lingered on his handsome face, taking in his long black hair, those beautiful green eyes, and the faint smile that appeared whenever he looked at me. He was everything I could reasonably want in a man. He made me feel comfortable, appreciated, and wanted without making me feel as though I owed him anything in return. He was someone I could imagine building something meaningful with, someone whose presence brought me peace rather than confusion.

And then there was Lorien.

My chest tightened at the thought of him. Unlike the others, Lorien had managed to make me question my own resolve even when I had convinced myself that I was done with him. He was the man I had tried hardest to move on from, yet somehow, he remained the one I kept returning to in my thoughts.

His confession in the archive room had only made things worse. He had told me he had chosen me, not the Crown, and that he had tried and failed to stop falling for me. Even now, I could remember the way he had looked at me when he said those words. Even after that, he had continued teasing me during our recent encounters, leaving me more aware of him than ever before.

I pressed my lips together. I couldn’t keep doing this. Perhaps if I finally made a choice, the confusion would begin to settle. Perhaps choosing one person would give me the clarity I needed to stop entertaining feelings for the others. It wasn’t a guarantee, and I knew that. Feelings didn’t disappear simply because I ordered them to. But I couldn’t remain stuck in this endless cycle of uncertainty, especially when someone as sincere as Esme was waiting for an answer.

I looked at him again. He had given me three weeks without pressure, three weeks of showing me what his affection looked like through small, consistent gestures. He deserved more than another vague promise to think about it. He deserved an honest answer, and I had finally made up my mind about what I wanted to do.

"Esme," I called softly.

"Yes?" he replied, his attention settling completely on me.

I swallowed, suddenly aware of how significant the next few words were going to be. Then, before my courage could abandon me, I looked directly into his eyes and said, "I’m ready to date you."

For a moment, Esme simply stared at me. His lips parted slightly, but no words came out, and the surprise in his green eyes was so unmistakable that I almost wondered whether he had heard me correctly.

Then, slowly, his expression changed. A beautiful smile spread across his face, brighter and more genuine than any I had seen from him before.

"Are you serious, Snowdrop?" he asked, his voice carrying a hint of disbelief.

I nodded, unable to stop the smile tugging at my own lips. "I’m serious."

A soft, breathless laugh escaped him as he lowered his head, briefly running a hand through his long black hair. The relief on his face was almost overwhelming. It was as though he had been holding his breath for three weeks and had finally been allowed to breathe again. "You have no idea how happy you have just made me," he murmured, looking up at me.

His hand cautiously found mine, his fingers intertwining with mine as though he still needed reassurance that this was real. I squeezed his hand, feeling an unexpected warmth bloom in my chest.

The nervousness that had been weighing on me moments ago began to fade, replaced by a happiness I hadn’t expected to feel so quickly. Perhaps I had been overthinking everything. Perhaps this was exactly where I needed to begin.

I was about to speak when Esme suddenly stood up and blurted out. "I’m coming. Wait for me."

"What?" I asked, too stunned to make sense.

He smiled just as the world around us began to dissolve. "I’m coming to be claimed by you in the real world."