Chapter 185: Crushed Hope

Elara:

I watched his expression carefully, savoring the moment his amusement disappeared. His gray eyes sharpened, and the hands resting against my back tightened almost imperceptibly. It was such a small reaction that anyone else might have missed it, but I felt it immediately. Apparently, the idea of his precious creation being destroyed was far more upsetting than he had expected.

"Burn it?" he repeated, the words coming out with a roughness that hadn’t been there a moment earlier. His hold tightened just enough to make me lift my chin in challenge. "You are actually planning to burn the dress?"

I raised an eyebrow, refusing to let him see how much his nearness was affecting me.

"What else did you think I was going to do with it? Frame it and hang it in my bedroom so I can admire the craftsmanship every morning?" I asked, my smile sharpening. "Although, I suppose I could use it as a very expensive cleaning cloth. I’m sure it would be excellent at wiping away the memory of certain people."

His jaw flexed, and for a moment I thought he might argue, demand that I return the gown, or remind me how much work had gone into creating it, or even how expensive it was.

I was prepared for all three possibilities. What I wasn’t prepared for was the way his expression changed, the teasing arrogance slipping away until something rawer and far more uncertain appeared beneath it.

His hands remained against my back, but the tension in his shoulders shifted, and when he spoke again, the words were so unexpected that I almost stumbled over my next step.

"Elara," he said quietly, looking directly into my eyes, "I’m sorry."

"What?"

The word escaped my mouth before I could stop it, barely audible beneath the music, and for one ridiculous second, I wondered whether the noise of the ballroom had somehow distorted what I had heard.

Kairo Greymark had just apologized to me. The same man who had watched me walk away from him with tears burning behind my eyes, who had kissed another woman in front of me, and who had stood beside her as though humiliating me had been nothing more than an amusing way to spend an afternoon. That Kairo was now holding me in the middle of a ballroom and apologizing.

Before I could gather my thoughts, I felt his fingers move lightly against my back, and a familiar ripple of magic swept over my skin. It was a privacy spell. I didn’t need to ask. I had practiced enough Illusion with him to recognize the subtle sensation of magic wrapping around us and muffling our conversation from the dozens of people surrounding us.

I said nothing about it, though. I simply kept my eyes fixed on his gray ones as we continued swaying to the music, waiting for him to explain why he had suddenly decided that an apology was necessary.

For perhaps the first time since I had known him, Kairo seemed to be struggling for words. His usual confidence had abandoned him, leaving him searching for a way to express whatever it was he wanted me to understand. The sight would have been amusing under different circumstances, but I was too stunned to appreciate it.

Finally, he drew a breath and looked directly into my eyes. "I’m sorry, Elara," he repeated, and my stupid heart betrayed me by giving a tiny, foolish leap. Then he added, "For what I did with Aria Cross."

Hope, that treacherous little thing, stirred before I could crush it.

"There’s nothing between us," he continued quickly. "There never was. That kiss was just a stunt I pulled on a whim, and I shouldn’t have done it." His fingers shifted against my back as though he were trying to reassure me through the very touch I had no business allowing. "I know how it looked, and I know I hurt you. But I need you to understand why I did it. After what happened between us that night, I didn’t want you to think it meant something permanent. I didn’t want you to expect more from me or for things to become complicated between us, and somehow, my stupid brain convinced me that kissing some random girl would put an end to all of it before it got out of hand." He swallowed, his expression tightening with what looked like genuine regret. "It was a terrible decision, and I’m sorry. I should never have used Aria like that, and I should never have-"

I stopped hearing him.

Not because his voice had faded, but because something inside me had gone painfully, terrifyingly quiet.

For a few seconds, I could only stare at him while his explanation rearranged every last piece of hope I had been foolish enough to preserve. He hadn’t kissed Aria because he wanted her. He hadn’t done it because he had found something in her that he had supposedly failed to find in me. He had done it because he wanted to make certain that I wouldn’t expect anything from him. Because the night we had shared, the night I had treasured despite my best efforts to pretend otherwise, had been something he wanted to erase before it became inconvenient. He had looked at the possibility of me wanting more and decided that humiliating me was easier than speaking to me honestly.

The tears arrived so quickly that I had to summon every ounce of control I possessed to keep them from spilling over. I would not cry in front of him. I would not give him the satisfaction of seeing exactly how thoroughly his explanation had destroyed what remained of my feelings. Whatever tenderness his apology had briefly awakened in me was dead now, buried beneath the cold, sharp understanding of what he had actually done.

"Let go," I whispered.

My voice was so quiet that anyone standing nearby would have mistaken it for a breath, but Kairo heard me. His words stopped, and his body went still as his gray eyes searched my face. Confusion flickered across his features, followed by something more concerned when he finally seemed to notice the change in me. Yet his hands remained against my back, and the continued closeness felt unbearable now.

"Elara, I-" he began, but I cut him off, lifting my chin until I was looking straight into his eyes.

"Let. Me. Go."

Each word came out colder than the last.

"You have about two seconds to release me before I slap you in the middle of this ballroom and create a scene that neither of us will ever forget."

His expression shifted into genuine astonishment, but instead of stepping away, he leaned closer, his voice turning urgent. "I don’t care if you slap me. I deserve it if that’s what you want to do, but you need to tell me what’s wrong. Princess, please-"

A smile curved my lips, but there was nothing remotely warm about it. "You might not care, Kairo, but I do. Unlike you, I’m not interested in turning my first public appearance as the Crown Princess into a spectacle for Starfall’s nobility."

His gaze flickered past my shoulder, and I knew the moment he noticed the curious glances beginning to drift in our direction. We had stopped swaying to the music, and in a ballroom full of people trained to notice every shift in a person’s expression, our sudden stillness was becoming difficult to disguise.

For once, Kairo seemed to understand that he wasn’t the only person whose wishes mattered. And his hands finally fell away from my back, releasing me.

* * *

Author’s Note:

If you guys plan to punch or slap Kairo, please throw in a few from my side too!!