Ch. 334 - Don't Argue, You All Suck Equally

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The crowd below all turned to look at him.

Seeing Chen Shu so emotionally fired up, they couldn't help thinking: Could we have actually misjudged him?

Chen Shu sighed and spoke:

"As a student representative of the new era, I have always conducted myself with openness and integrity. I have never feared anyone's scrutiny!"

"You can go ask around Nanjiang City — who doesn't know of Chen Shu's character?"

"And today, I've actually been accused of cheating! I find this somewhat hard to accept!"

He lifted his head and sighed, his eyes full of grief and helplessness, as if indicting the injustice of the world.

"I feel like he might be telling the truth."

"Maybe we really did misjudge him. Besides, what kind of cheating method could affect our contract spirits like that?"

"Looking at him... he doesn't seem like a bad person."

The crowd below buzzed with discussion. Some even showed traces of self-reproach in their eyes.

Had they actually wronged a model student?

BUUUURP!

Right at that moment, the Slime down below wobbled — and let out a loud burp.

A medicine bottle shot straight out of its mouth, landing perfectly right in front of Chen Shu.

"Uh... this..."

In that instant, the atmosphere across No. 1 Drill Ground froze solid.

The freshmen who'd just been feeling guilty all froze up. This... this didn't seem right...

Chen Shu's own eyes went wide. His grief-stricken expression instantly solidified on his face.

"Why does that medicine bottle look so familiar..."

He swallowed hard, his gaze locked dead on the Slime below.

Why now?! Why did it have to burp at the most critical moment?!

The Slime's eyes remained adorably vacant, its expression the picture of pure innocence.

"Hmm?"

Qin Tian picked up the medicine bottle directly. His gaze turned to Chen Shu, wanting an explanation.

"Chen Shu, fellow student — what's the situation here?"

Qin Tian's mouth twitched. How the hell did you manage to act that convincingly?

Just a moment ago, even he had believed Chen Shu had been wrongfully accused.

"So he really was cheating!"

"We demand severe punishment! Huaxia Academy upholds fairness!"

The crowd below instantly erupted. Even passing upperclassmen turned their heads to look, wondering what kind of extraordinary figure could unite the masses in condemnation.

"This kid... did he actually cheat?"

Liu Feng stroked his chin and muttered.

Chen Shu's eyes darted. He swallowed and spoke:

"Cheating? What cheating?"

He cleared his throat and explained: "The Slime is just overweight. It drank a little diet potion. Is there a problem?"

"A contract spirit drinking diet potion?!"

Qin Tian turned to stare at him. Could you possibly make up anything more ridiculous?!

"The beast doctor said obesity can lead to high blood pressure. Of course I have to look after my contract spirit's health!"

"If none of you believe me, you're welcome to take Little Yellow for a urine test any time."

Chen Shu, utterly unflustered, continued:

"I can guarantee — there isn't a single drop of urine in those stimulants... uh... I mean, there aren't any stimulants in that urine!"

Qin Tian rubbed his temples. For the moment, he found it hard to make a ruling.

Based on what he could see, Chen Shu probably had cheated.

But he'd never heard of any miracle drug that could affect other contract spirits' obedience levels.

And affecting such a wide range — several hundred of them at once.

If a miracle drug like that existed, it would undoubtedly be so precious that even he would hesitate to use it casually.

And yet Chen Shu had used it up — just for a freshman exam?

Wasn't that just completely insane?

He couldn't definitively confirm Chen Shu had cheated, but he also needed to appease the other students. The situation was tricky.

After a long pause, Qin Tian spoke:

"Chen Shu's subsequent performance will be temporarily voided! Only the combat prior to that point will be counted!"

At this, the crowd's anger finally subsided somewhat.

Chen Shu raised no objections either. He'd already eliminated two SS-rank contract spirits right from the start.

With that kind of stellar performance, first place was definitely locked in.

[Reward received: Explosion Potion ×3, Death Potion ×2, Invisibility Potion ×1]

The system had already delivered the potion care package — clearly, it considered him the winner.

"Principal, then what about our rankings?"

Just then, someone spoke up.

Chen Shu's later performance didn't count — but they'd all been eliminated, having failed to demonstrate their abilities at all. Ranking them would be tricky.

"Yeah! I feel like I could've made top ten!"

"I was definitely going to be second!"

The crowd below had actually started arguing among themselves. The top hundred all got rewards — naturally, people were going to fight over it.

"Everyone, don't argue!"

Chen Shu waved his hands, offering consolation: "You all suck equally[1] — there's nothing to argue about!"

"..."

The crowd below instantly fell silent, shooting him death glares.

This guy was an absolute master at drawing aggro!

"Enough!"

Qin Tian snatched the microphone away and spoke:

"The robots overhead will grade intelligently. Everyone had combat performance at the start."

Before the Poop Monster had flipped the table on the group fight, the freshmen had already been battling.

Now they were simply deleting the melee portion from the record. It could still maintain relative fairness.

As for Yu Yi and Fang Qingchen... they were in a rougher spot. Their "combat" before that had consisted entirely of getting beat up. Not a single standout moment to show for it.

Qin Tian spoke again:

"Today's opening ceremony is now concluded. This afternoon, everyone will assemble at the No. 1 Student Auditorium, where you will select your respective mentors!"

The freshmen on the drill ground began dispersing.

Thus ended the most absurd opening ceremony in the academy's history.

Chen Shu remained completely unfazed. He hopped down from the dais, recalling his two contract spirits as he went.

Wang Jue's eyes were full of admiration. "Bandit Bro — cheating on an exam? That's ballsy!"

Chen Shu shrugged. It was called using hacks, thank you very much. Totally different thing!

"Seriously though, cheating is still not good."

A'Liang sidled over and spoke with earnest gravity: "I think we need to be a bit more honest. There's too much deception in this world!"

"If everyone goes around deceiving each other, what becomes of the warmth between people?!"

Chen Shu raised an eyebrow and spoke calmly: "I'll give you a bottle of potion later."

A'Liang's expression flickered. He immediately shifted gears with perfect composure:

"I think sometimes a little deception is necessary. A white lie — completely reasonable!"

"Oh, by the way — when can I get that potion?"

"..."

Chen Shu and Wang Jue both shot him looks of utter contempt. If you wanted the potion, just say so — why put on that whole act?!

Liu Feng suddenly walked over and said, with a meaningful hint: "Chen Shu, this afternoon you'll be choosing your mentor!"

Chen Shu furrowed his brow, a troubled look in his eyes.

"Teacher, as you know, my performance in the entrance exam was outstanding. Both [Gigantification] and [Clone] — two divine skills — were exposed. Plus my Black Iron rank strength... basically every mentor wants me."

"I genuinely can't make a decision!"

Liu Feng's expression remained perfectly calm. He went straight for Chen Shu's weak spot. "One hundred academic credits."

Both A'Liang and Wang Jue had looks of pure envy in their eyes.

Goddammit — you pledge to a professor as your mentor, and you actually get paid for it? What kind of world was this?!

"Didn't we originally agree on one billion..."

Chen Shu, however, was unsatisfied. He muttered under his breath.

A'Liang and Wang Jue both jolted. How the hell were you still not satisfied?!

One hundred academic credits was worth ten million in Huaxia currency — but in reality, no one would be stupid enough to convert them into cash.

"One billion?! You really think I'm some kind of sucker?!"

Liu Feng's mouth twitched. He was a Gold-rank professor — not only immensely powerful, but with rich teaching experience to boot.

And now he was having to pay out of pocket — and the other party still wasn't choosing him?

Chen Shu waved his hand dismissively and said:

"We'll see this afternoon. I'm planning to hold an auction — and sell myself off..."

[1] 大家一样烂 (dàjiā yīyàng làn): Chinese internet gaming slang meaning "everyone's equally terrible." Originated from League of Legends/Honor of Kings communities where arguing teammates would be shut down with "stop arguing, you're all equally bad." Equivalent to the "they're the same picture" meme energy. Chen Shu's deadpan delivery makes it a perfect aggravating punchline.