Imperfect Desires

A triangle of orange light was advancing from the porch into the sitting room, over the edge of the large, silvery grey, silky carpet. The walls were hung with a fine grey canvas and the furniture was laid out perfectly accentuating the beauty of the modern interior of the sitting room.

A man was sitting on the accent chair with his one leg crossed over the other. His left elbow was placed on the armrest and supported his face while his right hand had a book. His grey eyes were engrossed, absorbed, almost in a trance. He seemed like he was transported to another reality.

Lavender curtains framed the windows from the north but were drawn from the west. The last orange rays of the sun peaked through the glass windows and fell on the back of his head, giving him an ethereal halo of his own. Behind the glass of the windows lied a beautiful yard blooming with delicate pansies, prim and proper tulips, exuberant daffodils and clusters of red roses. 

But the man inside the room found the book in his hand more beautiful than the world outside the windows. For him, the book opened as beautifully as the blooming flowers outside the window. Upon the leaves of this book was written something from the soul. 

"I saw a catastrophe in her and I knew it was meant to destroy something beautiful. I tried hard not to look. I did try. But... I still saw the beauty of her that was dazzling like the sun; even without looking at all. Her every breath brought peace to my tempestuous heart, and yet the comical laugh on her beautiful face brought another wave of madness to my heart. Possibly, that's why I almost forgot... Every dazzling sun fades in the twilight. She did too. The girl who shined brighter than the sun in my life was lost in the twilight of death..."

They say a writer's magic wand is his words and true enough, Darren was now caught in this wave of the magical world that was inscribed on the golden pages of the book. Those words had a vice-like grip on his mind, it's twisted reality was challenging his sanity. And Darren felt like losing this battle. He wished he could just skim read the book but... Why did he have to live through each page with breathless rapture?

The worst part of this world of imagination was the fact that it seemed to be taunting the voidness in his life, in his heart, and in his soul. After a brief pause, he continued to read further...

"She did destroy something beautiful. It was a pity that something beautiful was she 'herself'. And that way the hurricane that led me to my world actually lost herself to this world. The enchantress who bewitched me with her moon-struck smile and took my sanity with the way her eyes kissed my soul was led to her end all alone."

Darren's fingers curled into his palm instinctively. He closed the book, not being able to read any further. His eyes fell on the coffee cup lying on the chairside table beside him and he felt dazed. The coffee had gone cold now. There were no wisps of steam and Darren's mind recalled a haunting scene as he whispered, "She must have felt cold that night... Under the rain. She must have been so alone as well. I wish I could have been the umbrella you needed. But it's just a wish. One that can never be fulfilled."

His chest felt constricted and he to bit the inside of his cheek to keep his emotions under control. It was not an easy task. One would say it'd get easier after five years but only he knew, with each passing second, everything was getting difficult. More than it ever was. He closed his eyes shut as he placed the book in his hand at the side table.

"Daz!"

Darren felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Dylan looking at him with a worried look. But seeing the look in his eyes, Dylan was stumped for words. He knew in his heart that he had to avoid hurting Darren at any cost. 

So, he changed his original question which was, "Are you okay?" to the new question which turned out to be, "What are you doing here?"

The worried look in Dylan's eyes brought Darren back to reality. He was reminded once again that his sadness wasn't his alone. With him, all those who loved him were also being hurt. And he couldn't do that to them. This pain, regret, resentment and whatever else was there, all was his and his alone. Just like the love he had for her.

Therefore, Darren changed his expression and replied, "Your mother invited me for dinner."

"Oh..." Dylan nodded languidly before freezing as if lightning had struck him. He looked at Darren with wide eyes and the latter also looked back but with a look of sedateness.

"You're certainly in trouble, Didi," he said in an amusing manner and continued, "Now the real question is..." he looked at Dylan's pale face and went on, "What did you really do, Young Master Hedi?"

Dylan had a horrified look as he held Darren's arm as if he was his last hope and said, "Daz, my best friend. My brother from another mother. Be the sun in my dark sky, please!" Darren was not very convinced with this pleading. Of course, Dylan didn't have Xiu's cutesy charms to go along with his acting otherwise, he might have really had a chance here. But was Dylan Qiu going to give up so easily? Certainly not!

"Please, help me this time! Save me from my mother. I should have known that she was up to something when she called me. But I just couldn't read between the lines. She must be furious by now." 

"What exactly did you do this time?" Darren repeated his question with urgency in his voice.

"Well..." Dylan sheepishly backed away and said, "My blind date rejected me."

"Oh?" Darren feigned surprise and asked, "Why am I having difficulty in believing that you had nothing to do with her rejection?"

"Because I really did something," Dylan jutted in innocently smiling at him. When Darren gestured for him to continue, Dylan narrated the whole story of his blind date. From A to Z, well excluding the name of the girl he used. Dylan knew that Darren was impressed with his E.A's talents and if he had mentioned her name, he was sure that Darren would not help him at all. So, he intentionally chose to skip the name part.

"Will you help me now?" Dylan blinked his eyes at Darren expectantly.

 Right at this moment, a booming voice entered his ears making his whole body tremble. 

"Qui Hedi! You're so dead this time!" 

The voice belonged to his mother dearest and seeing how she had used his Chinese name to call him, he was certainly doomed this time.