Imperfect Desires

Coming back from her reverie, Xiu sighed out heavily and turned her gaze back to the now very familiar gravestone.

Carina Novell...

The original Bai Xiu lived with her single mother, Carina Novell. Her mother was Italian while her father... She knew nothing about that man who never existed in her life. All she knew was that her mother left her own family in Italy to chase after her 'invisible' father.

It was the only thing similar between Bai Xiu and Chen Xiu; both never knew about the fatherly love. But Bai Xiu was still lucky to have a mother who actually loved her. Unlike Chen Xiu's who used her just to revive her own fallen fame.

In five years, she learned a lot of things about the original owner of this body. For instance, Bai Xiu had a very pitiful childhood growing up without the warmth of a father. But it became worse when her mother got into an accident and was in a coma for three years before losing her battle with life.

Bai Xiu was only 16 when she was left all alone in this world to fend for herself. It was the kindness of her best friend's parents that she had a roof above her head. But there were plenty of unanswered questions in Xiu's mind.

For instance, what was real Bai Xiu doing at the cemetery when she died?

Or how she died so suddenly?

These were only a couple of questions. There were a lot more mysteries surrounding Bai Xiu's life. And with no recollection of Bai Xiu's memories, Xiu felt like a fake in the real sense.

Both Carina Novell and Bai Xiu had no relation with Xiu but she couldn't help coming back here. For them. Whenever she felt lost or tired, she would find her way to the Small Hill Cemetry at the outskirts of the city.

To give peace to the soul of Bai Xiu, she had buried her old things right beside her mother's grave. Xiu felt like this was the place that pitiful girl wanted to be. She might not have a relation with Bai Xiu and her mother but Xiu felt like she owed both of them. One was the woman who gave birth to Bai Xiu and the other was Bai Xiu herself who gave her not just her body but also life.

Oddly, she had felt at ease when she buried Bai Xiu's things right beside her mother. It was a peaceful sensation that rose from within her heart and engulfed her whole body.

Today yet again, she pulled out a rose from her purse and laid it before the gravestone with a soft smile on her face.

"I've come to see you again..." Xiu's voice was heavy with emotions. She was staring into the distance with contracted pupils. Xiu had learned from Nora that Bai Xiu always wanted to be a stable white-collar worker. Live a peaceful and normal life. And that's exactly what Xiu was working for.

Soon, the raindrops fell down in a drizzle. She didn't move. She had made a stronger bond with rain over the years. After all, the rain was there to accompany her when she died. It was also there to watch her rise from the dead like a Pheonix. Therefore, as the droplets of rain touched her, she felt like heaven was caressing her gently. It was soothing. It eased up every little knot in her heart.

Xiu smiled and looked up at the sky. "You really have a way to cheer me up." She was laughing merrily as if a mother was coaxing her and she was the child who was placated easily with a single kiss.

"Thanks for the pep talk!" She shouted to the sky.

Turning around, she said goodbye and made her way down the small hill. After skipping her way down, she couldn't find a taxi for herself. While waiting by the roadside, she was humming a beautiful melody. Her blouse was slowly getting wetter. Yet she found the time to lift her hand to catch the droplets of rain while singing to the melody of rain.

♫♪I've been holding on too long

I've been holding on too long

But those promises of forever

were never meant to be strong♫♪

As the rain caught a tempo, so did her beautiful and graceful voice.

♫♪I saw a notion in his eyes

I wonder if he saw something

in the wake of my smile

I wrote a story of our love

I wonder if he heard the call

of my yearning heart♫♪

She raised her head again to let the raindrops mercilessly assault her face or perhaps, her senses.

♫♪Oh, look I'm dreaming again

With only my wishful thinking

Even when I know,

this is just another sad song♫♪

Her blouse was so wet at this point that it stuck to her skin like a second layer of skin making her figure more prominent under that thin fabric.

♫♪But I was holding onto it for too long

I wonder if he finally saw me falling apart

I wonder if he heard the melody of my heart

singing just another sad song♫♪

Her voice had turned so soft as if she was singing the last verse in a hushed whisper. A sudden gust of wind stroked her body making her shiver instinctively. She wrapped her arms around her body in a daze.

She was stuck in watching the raindrops with such intent that she didn't even realize that someone had been standing behind her all this while. She only realized it when a warm coat jacket was placed on her shoulder.

Xiu was startled for a second and in confusion looked at that brown-colored coat that laid on her dainty, round shoulders. It had a very comfortable and warm touch to it. But how did it get here?

When she lifted her eyelids, she only caught sight of a strong and firm back clad in a button-up shirt while he climbed in the back seat of a Rolls-Royce.

"Hey!" Xiu lifted her hand to shout at him but the car had already revved up to leave. She frowned while holding the coat to keep it from falling. "You could have offered me a lift if you really wanted to help." She mumbled to herself but shrugged her shoulders eventually.

She decided she should stay happy with what she has. At least, he shielded her from the wind. It was already a kind gesture.

Just then a taxi stopped right before her and she finally settled in, to shield her body from rain and cold. On her way back, she kept staring at the coat with interest as if it was the most enthralling thing in this dull world. Actually, for Xiu, it was not just enthralling. It was rather appalling as well.

Were there really people who thought of lending a helping hand to a stranger? she wondered in bewilderment. From the intricate design and expensive fabric, Xiu could tell that it belonged to some rich scion. She was pursing her lips in confusion and groaned in exasperation before deciding to not overthink about it.