Chapter 157: Marriage 4

"Alright, answer now, Master Cain... cats or dogs?!"

Cain was completely fed up with this fool who had appeared out of nowhere and started spouting utter rubbish, deciding to give a brief answer to put an end to this farce:

"I like both."

Author-san stared at Cain after he delivered that response, a look of legendary revelation dawning across his face: "That means, Master Cain, that you adore balance... In other words, you love for your wife to wear... a bunny suit!"

Cain was struck speechless, the words freezing in his throat! What on earth did magical balance have to do with a bunny suit?! How had this lunatic drawn a connection between the two?! It made zero logical sense... and yet, completely unexpectedly, this bastard had hit the bullseye with absolute precision!

He had exposed one of his deepest, darkest secrets; after all... who wouldn’t want their wife to wear a bunny suit for them?!

Cain cleared his throat, attempting to regain his composure as he interjected quickly: "Alright, fine, that’s true... but that has nothing to do with you! Will you finish this nonsense right now?!"

Yet Author-san seemed dead set on wringing out the most eloquent literary phrasing in existence to satisfy them and guarantee his survival:

"Master Cain, are you implying that selecting the finest words to announce your marriage is nonsense?! This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment... a decisive instant separating an unforgettable memory from a mundane, vulgar event!"

Lucy sighed with annoyance, tilting her head: "I’m starting to get bored..."

A shiver of pure terror coursed through Author-san’s body; he had to wrap up this immortal literary address as fast as humanly possible! Time was not on his side, and he needed to switch to a direct approach immediately!

"Alright, alright! I’ll finish right now... but I must find the proper words first!"

Author-san closed his eyes once more, raising his head upward as though sinking deep into an ethereal meditation session:

"Alright, I have the right words... Congratulations! I pronounce you husband and wife! Isn’t that wonderful?!" Cain blurted out, desperate to bring the matter to a close.

Yet Author-san felt a prickle of regret; was he truly going to collapse like this before the plain, simple, conventional option?! Why couldn’t the declaration be just a bit more extravagant and radiant?!

Gathering the scattered remnants of his eloquence, he declared in a booming voice: "In this vast, glorious, and immortal universe... human souls are born bearing malice and evil, carrying desires for control, hatred, and spite... Yet at this very instant, pure love reveals itself to prove that the spirit of virtue still beats upon this earth!"

Author-san didn’t stop there, carrying on his narrative speech with immense passion while Cain glanced impatiently at his watch; a full half-minute had elapsed since this lunatic began, and he showed no signs of stopping anytime soon—and the fleeing staff could return at any second!

Suddenly... as Cain and Lucy sighed in misery, their eyes widened dramatically, the blood turning to ice in their veins!

A few steps behind Author-san’s back, a terrifying cosmic entity materialized out of thin air! It was an old man with a thick white beard covering his face, deep blue skin, an immense, towering stature, and a long face centered by a single eye that radiated a scorching, sovereign glare!

Cain and Lucy were utterly petrified; this entity was unleashing a crushing, destructive aura that he had concealed specifically from Author-san, whereas Cain and Lucy sensed it with absolute clarity... an aura that surpassed their cultivation realms by vast margins, capable of erasing them from existence in the blink of an eye if he so willed!

Author-san noticed the spellbound, shocked stares frozen on Cain and Lucy’s faces, believing in total ignorance that he had finally dazzled them with his mighty literary seas and legendary congratulations!

A wave of pride and self-worth surged through his body; these terrifying monsters who had wanted to eliminate him moments ago were now standing in awe of his eloquence! This was the true power of literature!

Swept up in his emotions, feeling as though he possessed the entire universe, Author-san closed his eyes once more and completed his poetic recitation:

"And when the sun shines upon you both, you shall remain together always in every new and coming day..."

Meanwhile, Cain and Lucy stood like statues, paralyzed by shock and dread, watching the horrifying aura dancing behind Author-san’s back as if it were on the verge of obliterating him, completely unbeknownst to this fool!

Author-san elaborated triumphantly: "Therefore... I officially... publicly... locally... internationally... and cosmically declare..."

Cain and Lucy wanted to scream at him to look behind him and put an end to this madness, but their tongues felt heavy under the sheer dimensional pressure!

"...that you are husband and wife!"

Author-san released their hands, bowing dramatically to the east and west, saluting an imaginary audience that existed solely inside his head!

Suddenly, a stern, heavy voice echoed, clapping slowly from behind him: "An exceptionally splendid performance..."

Morzoth stood behind him like an erupting volcanic mountain, boiling with rage!

Author-san smiled, saying with gratitude: "Thank you, sir, for your compliment... Wait, this voice..."

Author-san turned his face agonizingly slowly, completely unprepared for the sheer scale of the shock; when he rotated his head all the way back... he found Morzoth looming directly above his head!

He stammered in fatal horror: "I-I-I’m sorry..."

Author-san was on the verge of bursting into his customary fit of tears and begging, but he received a deafening slap that shook the entire premises! That slap sent his head flying with mythical force, blasting straight through the adjacent wall of the judge’s chamber, lodging his head deep inside the stone like a wooden stake!

Morzoth roared in immense anger that shook the structural walls of the building: "You useless fool! Are you idling around here and wasting time while the ’Grand Universes Tournament’ is right around the corner?! What a pathetic creature you are! Answer me just one question... is our universe’s team ready?!"

Wiggling his hand while stuck like a nail in the wall, Author-san raised a thumb, attempting to give a thumbs-up sign to signal that everything was fine and there was no cause for concern!

Morzoth growled: "Then where are they, hurry up?! There are only two days left until the tournament, and the candidates from other universes have already arrived at the venue!"

Author-san’s mind nearly burned out from terror; their universe’s team was not prepared in the slightest! He had no choice for survival other than reaching out his wedged hand and pointing urgently toward Cain and Lucy!

And when Morzoth turned his single-eyed head, glaring sharply toward Cain and Lucy, neither of them could even manage a shake of their head in denial under the weight of that crushing, absolute terror!