I Don't Want To Be Loved

Chapter 90: I’m Sorry, Rihannan

Rihannan was left unaware of the events that occurred over the last six years while she lived in Chrichton. All she knew was Igor’s deep-seated hostility against his own mother was much greater than the past.

“Didn’t you already take me down and take everything? My power, my people, my limbs, all of it. Why are you so wary of an incompetent old woman who can do nothing? Igor, I’ve done so many things for you…”

“Don’t you dare say that it’s for me,” Igor’s voice rose, his teeth grinding against one another. “You say it’s for the kingdom, that it’s for me, but in truth, it’s all done to satisfy your vain greediness. Don’t force your views on others under that dirty hypocrisy of yours!”

“Igor!”

Igor’s mind was full of cynical thoughts.

“You knew that I’d eventually come here should my wife decide to visit you, but it makes no difference. Our relationship will remain as is. But it’s good that we’re here. Don’t call for Rihannan again without my permission. You should do well to remember this advice, mother.”

He shut his lips and said no more and walked out with Rihannan by his side.

The queen, stunned and dispirited, stood in place for a long while.

‘…Igor, what did I ever do to you…?’ she thought solemnly.

Meanwhile, Rihannan and Igor reached the royal carriage. The servants opened the carriage door. Rihannan entered first, followed by Igor. He sat opposite of her.

While the carriage left, Igor maintained a look of anger and she did not know how to speak to him.

‘I wonder what I should do.’

Rihannan bit her lips and closed her eyes.

Things were growing worse and she was afraid when his anger would spill over onto her. This life would be the same as her last, she thought. She expected Igor to find fault in her for wanting to see the queen.

“I’m sorry. For dragging you out like that… I’m sorry. It was very unbecoming of me.”

She was taken aback. Words she never thought she’d hear flowed out of his mouth. She opened her shut eyes and looked at Igor. His gaze was soft, almost dolent.

“I’m sorry… if I scared you. For what you had to hear, I’m sorry. I planned to bring you out quietly, but we ran into my mother…”

Relief washed over her. It seemed like he had no intention of blaming her.

This was good…

This was progress…

“I visited the Queen because she sent her lady-in-waiting and it made it impossible to refuse–”

“I know. The duchess explained everything.”

Rihannan was confused.

“The duchess?”

“She came to see me personally and recounted the whole event.”

“I see.”

“Um… did my mother say anything to you?”

“…Nothing special.”

But he was dissatisfied with her answer. He stared at her and she felt the silent pressure.

Rihannan sighed lightly. “…Just a few words of lamenting and the story of His Majesty’s childhood.”

“Igor.”

“Yes?”

“Call me Igor… like we last agreed.”

Rihannan hurriedly fixed her words. “Yes. The Queen wanted to fix the relationship between the two of you. But she wasn’t forcing me. We just talked. That’s all.”

He was silent and did not reply.

Rihannan chose to break that silence.

“Igor, what happened?” she asked after much thought.

Anger was attached to both sides and she could not see why Igor held onto that anger even after his mother had long lost everything in her grasp.

“…What happened over the years? I don’t remember it being like this,” she said.

He remained tight-lipped and she thought she’d not get an answer out of him.

“Because I’m afraid of being with my mother,” he said not long after.