Chapter 381: I Told You to Go Have Some Fun, Didn’t I? (11)

A Head Chef of the Rooster Forest Sword Sect protested.

“You could either reduce the number of dishes or cut down on the inspections. Can’t we at least do one of those? Honestly, what is all this?”

“Chef Kang, do you think I want to be doing this? Orders from above are orders. We’ve got no choice but to follow.”

At that, the assistant chefs—all hunched in a corner, peeling a mountain of onions—nodded in agreement.

Yeah. Orders are orders. No question.

In the sacred laws of the kitchen, only after a year of peeling onions and another year of garlic are you even allowed to touch a soup ladle.

Of course, that doesn’t mean you're freed from onions and garlic after two years. Those two remain eternal companions to all junior chefs.

As sticks were poked into every single lovingly made dish, Kang the chef’s eyes blazed with rage.

These are dishes I crafted like my own children—can’t they just eat and enjoy them instead of acting like they’re laced with poison?

The disciples of the Rooster Forest Sword Sect handling the poison checks weren’t thrilled either.

Since that anonymous tip, transferring dishes had become the duty of sect disciples—not mere servants.

All of this was because of a single mysterious letter that had arrived at the Rooster Forest Sword Sect:

“A cunning viper has slithered in, fangs bared. You must remain vigilant.”

Naturally, Sect Master Kang Suyang’s heart had dropped to his stomach when he read it.

We’re hosting such precious guests and I’ve been far too complacent!

Thus began the emergency protocol.

A full-scale poison alert and inspection campaign—indefinitely extended.

But it had already been ten days since the tip.

There hadn’t been a single suspicious person, let alone a viper.

After all, the remaining servants of the sect were the loyal ones—the kind who’d stayed even when rumors swirled that the Demonic Factions would invade and destroy the sect.

They weren’t just servants. They were family.

Kang Suyang thought to himself:

So when exactly is this “viper” supposed to show up? Does it even exist?

****

That viper was currently doing nothing but draining the sect’s food supply.

The kind of food parasite who racked up a food bill three times higher than normal—a King Gluttonous Leech.

Of course, Qing’s acquaintances might scoff at the “three times” bit, saying that was actually underestimating her.

But naturally, when the quantity consumed goes up, the price per serving drops.

At the moment, that King Leech was surrounded by a band of fervent devotees.

“Oh dear young lady! Has your noble spirit remained vigorous and boundless? We heard the news. If not for you, a terrible tragedy would’ve occurred. If His Highness had passed, this old dog would’ve gladly been buried alive beside him. You’re not only the Prince’s savior—you’ve saved me, an old man who owes you a life debt! Alas, this old body doesn’t have much time left, so this young girl here will repay my debt for me!”

“...Me?”

The woman from Changye gave a baffled look, now suddenly saddled with a spiritual mortgage.

“Hehe, do you remember me, my lady? I’m Changnan Kumho. I may be no more than a conman and scoundrel, but didn’t I receive a great grace from you? But alas, I must serve His Highness—so Changye here will be the one to repay my debt.”

“Why is it me again...?”

Next to her was a man lazing around with an infuriating smirk.

“Oh, that sounds good. Changye, repay my debt too while you’re at i—GAAH! That hurts! You crazy woman, what kind of brute strength is that for a chick!?”

“Quit messing around.”

“Ahem. Last night, I dreamt of a radiant red jade the size of a hug, glowing with a divine aura, which then transformed into a vermillion bird and flew away—”

“Do you only know the Vermillion Bird? And anyway, you didn’t even sleep last night, you were—”

“Ahem, I have a humble offering...”

A man with long hair hanging over his face quietly pulled out a belt with a dagger attached.

This was the type of gift Qing liked.

For reference, her top gift preference was: 1) food, 2) weapons.

“Oh, a dagger. Thank you. I’ll use it well.”

“I... just found it lying around, no need to thank me, noble savior...”

“What are you talking about? The blade doesn’t even have a scratch—it’s brand new. Where exactly do you find something like this lying around? I wanna know. I’ll go scav—huh? Déjà vu?”

“That stingy bastard’s bribing her again!”

“That dirty bastard—why’s he the only one who came prepared!? Must be walking around with bribes in his sleeves!”

“Ahem! I... didn’t have time to prepare a proper tribute, but if Your Ladyship enjoys paintings—”

“Hold up. Ladyship?”

With that, gasp—the whole group of royal guests from Prince Deokhyeon’s estate fell silent.

They all glared daggers at the man in scholar’s robes who had just misspoken.

“Th-the Yeon Pa greets Her Highness.”

Realizing the ship had sailed, the scholar dropped to his knees, forehead on the ground.

And the others followed like dominoes, bowing low.

“I’m not trying to be a princess, so just get up. And Yeon Pa, I didn’t think you’d be such a blabbermouth. I really didn’t.”

“Yeon Pa only says such things out of overwhelming devotion to His Highness. Please don’t be too angry.”

“It’s not that, really...”

These were the guests from Prince Deokhyeon’s estate who had arrived late at night on the nineteenth of the first month.

Still treating her like some heavenly dignitary, still loud as ever.

Last time there’d been maybe a dozen or so, but now they were down to eleven—a noticeable drop in number.

“What are you fools doing here with nothing better to do!? If your hands are idle, find something to work on! Why are you barging into a lady’s quarters at this hour acting like headless chickens! Out! All of you! Except you, Changye, you stay.”

Ack. All the guests flinched in unison.

Apparently, they really were scared of Yeon Pa.

They all bowed and scrambled out of the room like frightened children.

“...Did you really have to announce I don’t want to be a princess to everyone like that?”

“I only feared those lowborn fools might commit some grievous offense against Your Ladyship. Though crude and foolish on the outside, they understand better than most how dangerous words can be. Please do not worry yourself.”

“Hm.”

It wasn’t an excuse—it was sincere deference.

A kind of protective feeling toward her.

Qing relented almost immediately. She couldn’t help it. That kind of thing was her weakness.

“This wretched old one was worried that Your Ladyship had no servant girl to attend you. Changye here may not look like much of a woman, but she is a woman, technically. You may use her however you please, like a convenient beast of burden—be it horse or ox. She will serve with the loyalty of a dog.”

“...Are you talking about me?”

Changye flinched, looking absolutely wronged.

Qing shook her head.

“Nah, no need. I don’t need anyone attending me. I’d actually feel more uncomfortable if someone did. I’ll just accept the sentiment.”

Had members of the Divine Cult been around to hear that, they’d be frothing at the mouth—What the hell is she saying!?

After all, if there were rankings in “being served,” Qing would be near the top of the world.

But Qing said this with pride.

When it came to the Old Doctor or her sworn sister, Qing had allowed them to serve her.

They begged to serve her, clinging to her legs and pleading for the honor.

What choice did she have but to let them?

Obviously.

How could one human make another serve them?

Still...

She hadn’t seen her sworn sister in a while...

Said she was going into closed-door training, right?

I wonder if she’s reached a new realm by now.

The “Supreme Peak of Transcendence” was no easy feat.

If she were truly my sister, she’d probably have to train a thousand years just to make the grade.

Oh well.

Next time we meet, I’ll have to enlighten her with a good lesson or two.

****

Today’s agenda was: a hike up Cheongsu Mountain.

Yesterday, the hot springs had informed her that some important guests had booked the entire place.

Qing had been furious—how dare they monopolize a public (not really) hot spring!

But when she heard the “important guests” were none other than military lords—the sons of royal princes—what could she say?

Of course, mere lords were at least a full step and a half beneath her, a princess of the imperial blood.

The “half-step” was because even a prince’s eldest son couldn’t quite stand beside a trueborn princess of the royal household.

Still, she wasn’t about to go throwing a tantrum like, “Do you know who I am? I’m a princess of the empire!”

So instead, she decided to check out Cheongsu Mountain—the place Unaram had been singing about nonstop.

But once she actually climbed it... her reaction was lukewarm.

“...This is what you call a mountain?”

“I did tell you it’s not that tall! But isn’t it perfect for a light warm-up!?”

“They should take the ‘Mountain’ out of ‘Cheongsu Mountain.’”

This wasn’t a mountain—it was a downtown hill.

Even officially, it wasn’t classified as a mountain, but more like a high-elevation neighborhood within Namnyeong.

Still, the tallest peak did have some trees left, and when she reached the top, a surprisingly familiar sight greeted her.

The whole path was lined with hiking trails, roadside vendors, tea shops, noodle stands, snack stalls, craft stores, all packed side by side.

There were inns with giant signs for rice wine and tofu, and Qing asked with a hint of suspicion:

“Is there a temple or something up at the top?”

“There is indeed! Isn’t it only proper for a mountain to have a temple or a Taoist shrine at the summit? A temple at the top is the peak’s true purpose! Ooh! A deeply meaningful phrase, isn’t it!?”

“Yeah, I’ve seen enough. Let’s go back.”

A forest of wood-frame tea houses, soup shacks, liquor joints—topped off with a temple.

What is this? Did I somehow loop around and end up back in South Korea?

“You’re not going up!?”

“I can already picture it. Some overpriced incense tiles, shady trinkets, and half-assed tea. If I’m just gonna drink tea and eat anyway, why pay tourist trap prices?”

“That... is a fair point...”

Even though it was standard for mountain-top prices to be higher, this was just ridiculous.

The path was paved, the slope gentle, and the shops polished. There was no excuse.

“How about instead—you know any hidden gems? Like local spots only the real residents know about?”

“Hmm! If that’s what you want! Come to think of it, Big Sister, you’re not picky, right? Do you like eating raw?”

“I mean, yeah, but... the way you said that sounded really weird.”

“In that case! How about White Grub Worms! A delicacy of the Bug Tribe! Supposedly delicious!”

“White... grubs? As in, bugs?”

“Yes, they are bugs!”

Qing’s face instantly twisted into a scowl.

“Didn’t you just ask if I liked eating raw stuff?”

“I did! These larvae are this big! I heard they taste like buttery milk with a hint of apple!”

Unaram held up her index finger—not even her pinky.

“Unaram, do you eat those?”

“I can’t! They’re too gross! But if Big Sister is going to eat them—this Unaram will cheer you on! With all her courage!!”

So... in other words, she’s not eating them.

Normally, wouldn’t someone say “I’ll try it too”?

How badly must she hate them if cheering takes courage?

“Forget that. Let’s just go find a teahouse and eat snacks. Know any good places?”

“Apologies! I have no expertise in snacks! Searching for snacks sounds... too womanly, doesn’t it!?”

“...And what are you, Unaram?”

“I am a martial artist!!”

Qing tilted her head.

She keeps calling me Big Sister and pretending to respect me, but this is starting to feel off.

Still, Unaram was just being Unaram.

Meanwhile, wasn’t there another pathetic food parasite who did nothing all day but eat, drink, soak in hot springs, lie around, and repeat?

Honestly, Unaram—with her unwavering admiration—was the one who deserved to be admired.

And so, abandoning the “local delicacy” search, Qing redirected to snack hunting and wandered through the bustling downtown of Namnyeong in search of a good teahouse.

Then—CRASH, CRACK!

Something broke with a loud clatter, followed by a piercing scream and vicious shouting.

Hm?

That sound... something chaotic?

A bad guy, maybe?

Suddenly, food and tea lost all appeal.

What she craved now was the metallic tang of blood, the sizzling heat of violence, the slap and sting of hands-on combat.

Ahh. Come to think of it, I really have been holding back for a while now...

A pure, innocent smile bloomed behind her veil.