Heart of Darkness

At first, Skender was frustrated that he had to have lunch with her and now he was frustrated that he had to wait for her. He was becoming irrational and it was a trait he recognized when a woman was involved. The way he had been irrational with Ramona and got his heart broken, he was again serving himself for pain and misery. 

He didn't have to see to know that she was now close by. The scent of fresh soap, salt, and ocean reached his nostrils. And then she appeared in front of him. Changed into new clothes, hair and lashes wet and a face bruised on one side. Her eyes were like the ocean themselves with strong waves that shook him and then drowned him. 

"Your Majesty," she bowed and her wet hair fell at the sides of her face. His heart fluttered like a little boy who saw a beauty for the first time. 

Oh, it smells lovely. I am hungry, she thought. 

Why could he not block her thoughts? She had to think so loud. 

"Please, come and sit." He told her and went to pull the chair out for her forgetting that she was a man and he was royalty. But who cared? He hated his royal title and to him, she was a woman. 

She looked at him surprised and sat down hesitantly. "Thank you, Your Majesty." She said not expecting such politeness from him. 

She forgot about the food for a moment and focused on him as he sat down. The servants stepped forward and began to remove the locks from the plates and serve them. 

Skender decided to relax and act as if he was seated with any other trainee. "You put up a good fight." He told her. 

A gentle smile lifted her lips. "Thank you, Your Majesty. I am glad you enjoyed it." 

Not entirely. Especially not now when he saw the bruises on her face and her cracked lip. It swelled up a little. With only a kiss, he could heal it. He could run his tongue along the seam of her lips and then flick it over the wound or he could take her lip into his mouth and suck gently. What kind of sound would she make? Would she like it? 

Roxana pulled her tongue out and flicked it over the wound, grimacing slightly. 

"Does it hurt?" He asked her. 

She looked up from the food on the plate, mesmerized by his eyes, just the way he was by hers. "Sir Fulker says a real man revels in pain." 

Sir Fulker needed some wine. 

"Do you agree?" 

I am no man, and if that was true then real men are stupid, she thought. 

"No." She said. "Only those who don't know real pain would speak of it so lightly." 

The way she said it tugged at his heart. She had been through a lot of pain and he didn't need to go through her mind to see it. It was evident in her eyes. 

Her gaze was drawn to her plate again. 

"Let's eat," Skender said. 

She picked up her knife and fork. "Thank you for this reward, Your Majesty." She smiled. 

She made a short prayer in her head before cutting a piece of meat and putting it in her mouth. She grimaced when the heat touched her wound. Forcing herself to swallow she put a hand over her mouth looking pained. 

"Are you alright?" 

She nodded. "Yes. It is delicious, Your Majesty." 

God. He hated it the most when she called him by his Royal title. Alexander, he wanted to correct her. Alexander! 

Be quiet. It was Skender and no need for the anger. 

He concentrated on his food but she kept bothering him since she was in pain and couldn't eat as usual. 

"Take small pieces and let it cool." He told her as if she were a child. She was certainly acting like one now and was she adorable and annoying. "No need to rush. You can sit here and eat until you are content." 

She looked at him with those dreamy eyes again. "Your Majesty;" She breathed. 

You are most generous, he said in his head before she said it and he smiled while forcing back a laughter. 

Roxana slowed down her way of eating and tried to enjoy it this time all while watching him whenever she could. Skender took notice of the scratches and bruises on her knuckles. With a kiss, he could heal those as well. 

When she finished her plate, he served her more meat and vegetables."Your Majesty. You shouldn't serve me." She said horrified. 

"It is my duty to serve you," he said emptily. 

She was confused for a brief moment before she understood his comment and smiled. "You are a good King, Your Majesty." 

"Barely." 

"I have been in many kingdoms and I like it here the most." She said with a sad smile. "People talk about the good changes you have made in the short time that you have been ruling. It is not easy to make a change and it takes a lot of time and effort. A lot of patience." 

At least she knew. His changes outraged the people of power and sometimes made things worse instead of better. Even with commoners, they needed time to adjust to the new changes, regardless of the type of change. Strange thing but resisting a change was in human nature. And demons too. 

"And Your Majesty," She leaned in with eyes lighting up. "I have a good intuition about people and it tells me that you are a good man."

 'You are a good man, Skender.' Ramona's words echoed in his mind. 

Good? He didn't want to be good anymore. He was tired of hearing it because often it meant that he was good, but not good enough. He was good but Ramona could easily move on. He was good but he was a sloth. A destroyer. He was good, but not a defender. 

He had to be a certain way. A certain someone. Someone he did not choose to be. He didn't choose to be born a defender nor did he choose to be cursed to become a destroyer. He did not choose to have his demon taken away. A part of him had always been missing and he hadn't even known about it. No wonder the destroyer came back. He did not care to be good anymore. No good had come of it. 

"You do not know me." He said. 

'I wish to know you.' It was a whisper in her mind but he heard it. 

"My apologies, Your Majesty. I did not mean to offend you." She said. 

They looked at each other in silence longer than they were supposed to and then he looked away. "You should eat." He said. 

It took him a while of more silence to realize that he was fighting the urge to talk to her again. Reading someone's mind was often a mess and it took away from knowing what someone chose to say which was more important to him. He wanted to know the way she spoke. What she would choose to tell him. 

"Do you live alone with your sister?" He asked. 

God. He was weaker than he thought. Already giving in. He was a pushover. Giving away himself so easily. 

"With my sister and…brother. Fanny." She said. 

She lived with a man? Who wasn't her brother? He was so close to listening to her thoughts on purpose again before he stopped himself. If he didn't just hear it, he would not dig into her mind. No! Especially this he didn't want to know. 

"What about your parents?" 

She shifted uncomfortably and forced a smile. "I don't know where my parents are. We were separated." 

He frowned. He already knew she wasn't from here so how was she separated from them? 

"I hope you find them." He said closing off the topic. 

"I hope so too." She said and looked back at her empty plate. 

Skender reached out to serve her some more but she held her hands up. "I am full, Your Majesty and I am not being polite. I never say no to food."

For some odd reason, he felt disappointed that their lunch had come to an end. He wanted more time with her. Needed more time with her but he also wanted her gone. 

Go!

Leave! He ordered himself but he just couldn't. 

"Do you want some tea?" 

For God's sake. This couldn't be him asking. 

"I would love to, Your Majesty." Her smile widened until she flinched in pain again. 

He turned to one of the servants and nodded for him to come. "Go to the physician and bring medicine for bruises." 

The servant bowed and left. 

"You really don't need to, Your Majesty." Roxana seemed touched. 

I am not doing it for you, he wanted to say. He was just bothered by it. But why?

"Let's have the tea in the park." He said standing up. 

She followed him in silence and they went to sit outside in the sun. Her hair was just like the sun, like the first rays of warm sunshine after a cold winter. Like… falling in love. 

Roxana leaned back and basked in the warmth. "Your Majesty. What is your favorite season of the year?" She asked him. 

Spring.

"Mine is spring." She smiled. "When the world starts to become green, and the flowers begin to bloom, and the birds start to sing and the sun begins to shine." 

His mother loved spring too, She said it was hope. A new beginning. 

Roxana watched the sky with dreamy eyes and then as if suddenly waking up from the dream her eyes widened. 

'Oh, Lord. You are a man. Stop talking like a woman.' she scolded herself and then looked at him. 'This man makes me forget that I am a man.'

And you never make me forget that I am a man, he replied in his head to her thoughts. 

They were served tea and she picked up her cup to stop herself from saying anything further. "This smells delicious," she said and took a sip, grimacing again. 

"Your Majesty, here is the medicine." The servant gave him a small box. 

Roxana put down her cup and looked between him and the box. But he only looked at her.. And then he rose from his seat with the box in his hand. What was he thinking of doing?