Chapter 297: What I Did

Kaden’s POV

​Logan took a slow breath. "Rebecca was accused of murdering Queen Helen."

​My entire body froze. Helen. Murder. Rebecca. Something suddenly flashed through my mind: blood—Helen lying in a pool of her own blood. My breath caught. What the fuck? I stumbled backward slightly. No. Helen died during childbirth. That was what I remembered. She had died giving birth to our child. So why the fuck had I just seen her lying in blood?

​The image disappeared before I could grab hold of it, leaving behind a sharp pain in my skull. I grabbed the edge of my desk. "What the fuck..."

​"Kaden?" Kane moved toward me.

​"Don’t touch me." He stopped immediately. I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment before looking at Logan again. "Keep talking."

​"Rebecca was found with Helen’s body. Everyone believed she killed her, including you."

​My jaw tightened as another flash struck me without warning. Ruby. No. Rebecca. She was on the ground while a crowd surrounded her. Something struck her body. Then another. People were throwing stones at her. Tears streamed down her face as she tried to protect herself. And then it was gone. I sucked in a breath and squeezed my eyes shut. What the fuck was happening to me?

​"She was Alpha Kelvin’s daughter," Logan continued. "At least, that was what we all believed. Instead of executing her immediately, you gave her another option."

​My stomach twisted. "What option?"

Logan hesitated, and something about that hesitation made dread crawl through me. "Tell me."

​"You made her your breeder."

​My eyes opened. "What?"

​"You wanted an heir."

​For several seconds, I couldn’t speak. Then I shook my head. "No."

​"Yes," Logan said.

​"No." I stepped away from the desk. "That’s bullshit."

​"Kaden..."

​"I said it’s fucking bullshit!" I snapped. "I would remember something like that."

​"That is exactly what we’re trying to tell you," Kane said. "You don’t remember because we took all of it from you."

​I stared at my brother before slowly turning back to Logan, my chest feeling tight. "What else?"

​Logan’s expression changed, and immediately I knew I wasn’t going to like whatever came next. "You put a suppression choker around Rebecca’s neck. It weakened her wolf and hid her scent. You kept her under your control because you believed she murdered Helen."

​My fingers tightened around the edge of my desk. "No."

​"You treated her badly, Kaden."

​"Stop."

​"You accused her. You humiliated her. You imprisoned her."

​"Stop."

​"You hurt her."

​"Logan, I said fucking stop!" My roar shook the room, and everyone fell silent.

​I couldn’t breathe properly. I turned away from them and dragged both hands through my hair. No. I couldn’t have done those things. Not to Ruby. Not to the woman whose smile could change my entire fucking mood. Not to the woman I couldn’t sleep properly without thinking about. Not to the woman I had held in my arms and promised to protect.

​I had put a choker around her neck? I had imprisoned her? Humiliated her? Hurt her? How? How the fuck could I have looked at that same face and hurt her?

​"No," I muttered again, but this time there was no anger in my voice—I was trying to convince myself. "I couldn’t have done that."

​Nobody answered. I slowly turned toward them. "Tell me I didn’t."

​Kane’s face tightened, and that was my answer.

​Something painful twisted inside my chest. Images were trying to form inside my head, but every time I reached for them, they disappeared. All I could see clearly was Ruby as I knew her now: the fear in her eyes whenever I got too close, the strange sadness when I touched her, the way she sometimes stared at me like she was remembering something painful, the questions about my memories, the way she had asked to hold Helen’s locket because she claimed it triggered flashes, her desperation to leave.

​Fuck. I hadn’t understood any of it.

​My stomach twisted violently as the truth began taking shape. She had been living under the same roof with the man who had imprisoned her. She had been looking into the face of the man who had hurt her while I smiled at her like we were meeting for the first time. I had touched her. Kissed her. Held her while she slept. Told her I loved her. And all along, she remembered everything I couldn’t.

​My throat tightened. "Why did she let me touch her?" The question came out before I could stop it. Neither Kane nor Logan answered immediately. I laughed under my breath, but there was nothing funny about it. "Fuck."

​I remembered kissing her in my private room—the desperation in the way she had kissed me back that last time. I had thought she was finally choosing me, but she had been planning to run.

​My eyes burned. "Why did she come back as Ruby?"

​Kane answered this time. "She didn’t exactly have a choice. After the memory spell, things became complicated. She had to hide who she really was from you. The choker helped hide her wolf, scent, and everything that could make you recognize her. Ruby was the identity she used so you wouldn’t know she was Rebecca."

​I dragged a hand down my face. "Fuck."

​My gaze moved toward the witch. The black pouch was still clutched in her hands, and suddenly I couldn’t stop staring at it. My memories existed. Everything I had forgotten about Rebecca was still somewhere: the truth about Helen, the truth about Rebecca, every moment between us, everything I had done to her. I should have wanted them immediately. Instead, for the first time since they walked into the room, I felt something that wasn’t rage: fear. Real fucking fear.

​What would I see if those memories came back? Would I see myself putting that choker around her neck? Would I remember her begging me to stop while I ignored her? Would I remember the hatred in my own voice? Would I see every single thing I had done to make the woman I now loved so fucking terrified of me?

​My stomach turned. I wasn’t afraid that the ritual would hurt. I was afraid Logan was telling the truth. I was afraid I would get those memories back and discover that the man Ruby had been running from deserved to be hated. For the first time, I understood why she had been so afraid of me remembering. Maybe she wasn’t afraid that I would hurt her again; maybe she was afraid of what I would become when I remembered what I had already done.

​My wolf whimpered inside me, and I closed my eyes.

​Did we really hurt her? He gave me nothing but pain in return.

​Fuck. My eyes opened again. I wanted to know. I didn’t want to know. Both feelings were tearing through me at the same time. But I couldn’t live with half a life. I couldn’t continue loving a woman while knowing there was an entire history between us locked away inside some fucking stone.

​"Where are my memories?" I finally asked.

​The witch’s eyes met mine. "We have them."

​My heart began racing. I walked toward her and stopped in front of her, my gaze dropping to the pouch. For a few seconds, I couldn’t say it. What if I remembered everything and couldn’t live with myself afterward? What if Ruby had every reason to hate me? What if there was nothing in those memories worth forgiving? My hands curled into fists. I was fucking terrified. But they were my memories. She was my past. And I needed the truth.

​"Give them back."

​The witch didn’t move.

​I lifted my eyes to hers. "Did you fucking hear me? Give me my memories back."

​"It isn’t that simple, Alpha King."

​"Make it simple."

​"The memories can be restored," she explained carefully. "But the magic cannot force them back into your mind. You have to willingly accept them—all of them. Once the process begins, you cannot choose which memories you want and which ones you don’t."

​The fear returned, but I forced myself to look at her. "I don’t give a fuck how bad they are," I said, although my voice wasn’t as steady as I wanted it to be. "They’re mine. Whatever I did, I need to know."

​"Kaden," Kane said behind me.

​I turned. There was something else on his face—something he hadn’t told me. My eyes narrowed. "What?"

​Kane didn’t answer. Then I remembered the one thing none of them had explained: the baby.

​My wolf stirred instantly. I looked between Kane and Logan. "And the baby?"

​Silence. That fucking silence again. My entire body tensed. "What about the baby?"

​Kane’s jaw tightened.

​I stepped toward him. "You’ve lied about everything else. So tell me the fucking truth about that too."

​Kane swallowed. "The baby isn’t mine."

​I stared at him. For a second, the words made no sense. "What?"

​"The baby Rebecca is carrying," Kane said. "It’s not mine. It never was."

​My wolf suddenly slammed against me so violently that I nearly lost my balance. Ours. I froze. The same word. The same fucking word my wolf had given me before when I felt the baby. Ours. My eyes slowly widened as all those moments came rushing back: the strange pull I had felt toward her stomach, the insane need to protect a child I believed belonged to my brother, the way my wolf had refused to accept that the baby wasn’t connected to me.

​I looked at Kane. "No..."

​Kane held my gaze.

​"The baby is yours, Kaden."