Because I Cannot Hurt You

An Guoting stared at her. "Curse me? Tell me, Zongying. What have I done? From the beginning till the end, what is my mistake? I was helpless before you when you couldn't trust me and broke up with me. I was devastated. It was at that time I met my wife, who pulled me out of that despair. Yes, I married her. So?"

She stiffened.

"Don't I have the right to be happy? Did you expect that I would never move on? Why? I never thought that way for you. I never thought that you don't have the right to find another man."

Han Zongying gritted her teeth. "Hah! I could never find another man because I was still attached to you even though I hated you. Then why did you if you were so innocent and still loved me so much!?"

"Zongying…I think you are really misunderstanding something. A relationship is not all about love. You didn't trust me. A person can still live with someone even if he is not loved. But nobody can stay if he is not trusted. And certainly not with someone who is selfish like you."

"You…"

"Yes, Han Zongying. You have been nothing but selfish. I feel stupid now for falling for you. Every time... every single time, it was only about you. You didn't trust me. You broke up with me. Then years later, you say that I have no right to marry another woman. You…" he clenched his fists with tears in his eyes that shook her.

"You forced me that night, and I feel pathetic because I feel as if I have betrayed Yueqin. I just wanted a mother for Caihong. I had no intentions to have any relationship had I remarried. But you ruined everything…You never thought about me. It was only about you," his cheeks were wet. "I don't really care if you are making me take the blame for the night," he dryly chuckled, "I don't expect anything less from a selfish woman like you."

She froze.

"You just proved to me even more right what kind of a person you are by doing this, and the luckier I feel that we broke up. If I hadn't met Yueqin, I would have still been too blind to realize what kind of a person you are."

She blankly stared at him.

"I only came here because of Yueqin," he trembled. "If she is alive…"

He then paused and looked at her. "And you don't have to worry about me spilling the truth. Your father is standing on the verge of his death. I pity him. At this point when he is so fragile, he really doesn't need to listen to the ugly truth about his daughter. It would be like murdering Han Huizhong in cold blood."

Han Zongying was so enraged by An Guoting that she wanted to expose her pregnancy, but she couldn't. She wanted to see his face when he would know that she was carrying his child.

But Han Huizhong had strictly said that nobody would tell him about it. He didn't deserve to feel guilty or know about the child inside her.

"Tell me Zongying. You aren't lying about Yueqin, right?" An Guoting desperately asked. "You really saw her, right? Where did you see her? Where was she going?"

His questions only irritated her more. She only said that she saw her and nothing else. 

But it was enough for An Guoting. He thought he would be able to search for her even if he didn't have much information. Then he got a call from his house maid who said that Caihong was crying.

"Caihong is crying?" He anxiously said, "I will come back right now."

Han Zongying froze.

Caihong…

Then she thought about her child, and she felt disgusted.

Heh…Guoting wouldn't love my child, anyway right? Even if he knew, he would discard him just like discarded me.

Han Huizhong was enraged when he woke up to know that An Guoting was gone.

"Does he think that he can run away because I collapsed!? He is fucking wrong!"

"Dad please…" Han Zongying cried. "Please don't do anything...I beg you. I don't want justice. Swear on me that you won't do anything."

Han Tian exclaimed. "Are you crazy, Zongying?"

"I am not! Please listen to me! Just…" she felt dizzy and collapsed.

They got afraid of seeing her like that. So they decided not to do anything not to stress her out.

The next few days, they only focused on Han Huizhong and Han Zongying's health. However Han Huizhong didn't stay quiet. He crashed down An Corps's stocks like crazy and filled the media with news that defamed him. He wanted to expose him, but he also didn't want the world to know what had happened with his daughter. He didn't want anybody to label her as a pitiful rape victim.

It was a hard time for An Guoting too. He had to pull himself together or his company would have reached bankruptcy.

A month after this one-sided business war, Han Zongying announced one day.

"I don't want this child," she said in an expressionless tone.

Han Liqin was horrified. "Zongying, what are you saying? A-abort your child?"

"Yes."

"Zongying, your child is innocent. Whatever happened…"

"I don't care. I want to abort this child."

Little Zhiyuan, who Han Liqin was cradling in her arms, suddenly started to cry. "Waaaaaaaa…."

He flailed his little hands towards Han Zongying's belly as if wanting to protect her. "Baaaaaaa…" Big drops of tears fell from his eyes.

Han Liqin's eyes were filled with tears too. "See? Even Zhiyuan is telling you not to kill his sister."

She said nothing.

Han Huizhong grimly said, "You will not abort the child, Zongying. This is ridiculous. You shouldn't take revenge from an innocent life who doesn't even know anything. Kill An Guoting if you want. But you cannot kill your child."

Han Tian slowly nodded. "Please, Zongying. Take this thought out of your mind."

Han Zongying clenched her fist. 

Why…Why do I have to give birth to this child!? I don't want it....