Because I Cannot Hurt You

"Really such a long time!" Nana exclaimed.

Xiaosi said, "Indeed. Are you the same goody two shoes Nana I knew or did you toughen up a bit?"

She fumed and glared at him. "We are meeting after so long and this is how you talk to me? That goody two shoe is taunting!"

She put her hands on her waist indignantly.

Xiaosi smiled. "I see motherhood has changed you a lot. You never used to argue back in the time."

Caihong rapidly blinked her eyes and stared at Xiaosi, feeling a little stunned. He could actually talk so nicely to someone. Ever since the picnic, there were subtle changes to their relationship that were unknowingly taking root between them. Neither Caihong talked too hatefully to him nor Xiaosi spoke any more rudely. If they met, they would just act neutral.

But the genuine smile on his face right now made Caihong wonder when was the last time he smiled like that. Every time, he had a calculative and cunning smile plastered on his lips. It didn't allow anybody to peek into his thoughts and know his true intentions.

Nana said, "You are lucky to have Caihong as your wife. She is so pretty and kind. Do you have any children?"

He smiled. "A daughter. Chyou. She is six."

Nana beamed in happiness. "Ah, I would so like to meet her!"

"You can come to Zhu villa anytime. She will be happy to meet you too."

"Sure!"

Jinhai coldly said, "No need. Your daughter can come here anytime."

Xiaosi's mouth twitched. 

Only my daughter. So of course I am not invited.

Nana shot a glare at her husband. "Don't be so rude, Jinhai!"

He gritted his teeth. He didn't know how suddenly this man who knew Nana suddenly popped up out of nowhere.

There are just so many flies around her.

Jian sheepishly grinned. "Mom, is he perhaps your childhood lost love?"

Nian dramatically clutched his chest. "Ah, the wheel of fate is so cruel. Before love could bud between these two innocent children, time played its hand and snatched Mom away never to meet him again."

Jian wiped the non-existent tear in his corner of the eye. "Fate has led them to meet again so many years later but how? Aish! Both are married and have children of their own."

"Will the lost love rekindle?" Nian touched his chin.

"What will happen to their partners and children in this quest of love?"

"Will they reunite?"

"Or will fate drive them apart once again?"

"Stay tuned for the next episode only on the show Nana's tragic love!" The twins laughed loudly.

Everybody - "..."

Yunru raised his brow at Xiaosi's dumbfounded expression. His smile soon faded away as he thought of Shuang. He found it frustrating. Whenever he saw Xiaosi, he would always remember Shuang. He hated that feeling because it reminded him of Shuang's feelings for him.

Jinhai grabbed the twins by their collars and dangerously smiled. "I didn't know my sons were so talented in making TV shows. Come with me. I need to see that talent in more depth."

They gulped, seeing the alarming expression on his face.

We are in big trouble! Ugh. We shouldn't have made him jealous.

They looked at their savior. "Nuo~~ Save your brothers-"

But she was busy chatting with Siying and Xinyi. "Nuo fweind with Siying!"

Siying nodded. "Me too!"

"..."

Jinhai dragged them away upstairs while their painful cries resounded in the restaurant. 

Nana coughed and apologized. "That I am so sorry. The twins are sometimes…"

"Always stupid," Jun said in disdain. 

"Baaaaaaaaaa…" Jin chirped and laughed as if giving his agreement.

Nana said, "Since everybody is here, why don't you have dinner here? It will be fun."

Jun nodded. "I agree. I will get to spend more time with my mother-in-law."

Zhiyuan's gaze darkened. Xinyi only chuckled.

Let us just leave this place already!

Xinyi brightened. "Sure!"

"..."

The three families had a lovely sumptuous dinner after which the kids played some more with each other. Zhiyuan and Jinhai had left the group to keep an eye on Jun and Siying respectively much to the poor kids' dismissal. Xinyi sighed and had to go to Zhiyuan's side not to bully Jun anymore though it was him getting bullied by a child. Xiaosi and Yunru were outside.

So it was only Caihong and Nana now. 

Nana smiled. "So so! How did you meet Xiaosi? Xinyi said that you are all college friends."

Caihong said, "Yes. We were a big group in college. There are others too - Ah Cy and Liang. They are a couple and the same age as us. There is Shuang too. My sister. Same age as Xinyi and Yunru."

"Oh! So it's college love. So fascinating."

Caihong stiffened.

The past was different and too complicated. It wasn't like how Nana was imagining it to be at all. But of course, she didn't have to know that. She faintly smiled and left it at that.

"I am really happy for Xiaosi," a swirl of emotions shone in her heart as Nana said.

Caihong hesitated and thought for a few moments but then she couldn't resist asking. "How was Xiaosi as a child?"

Nana glanced at her.

"I mean I understand you lived in the orphanage for a short time…"

She smiled. "A very gentle and kind boy. He mocks me for being goody two shoes, but he was just like me in that aspect. He was a really good and dependable big brother. He liked taking care of the younger kids and we always felt safe with him. Everybody wanted Xiaosi's attention and to play with him," she chuckled. "They literally fought for Xiaosi's praise."

Caihong listened to her in a trance.

"Other than that, he really liked to keep things to himself a lot. That was really annoying," she pursed her lips, "he never shared his pain with anyone. He tends to hide things a lot."

She blinked her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"I remember when I went to visit the orphanage once, I met the caretaker at that time. I was fourteen. Xiaosi must be sixteen? He had already left the orphanage by then to live in the school dorms and even pay his own school fees by doing part-time jobs."

"Oh…But wait. Didn't he ever get adopted?"

Caihong felt a little embarrassing to ask this. In Nana's eyes, it would be looking too awkward that as Xiaosi's wife, she knew nothing about his past.

"It was his choice not to get adopted by any family. Many families offered to take him in, but he refused."

She was taken aback by this.

His choice?

She sighed. "The scars of his past were too hard to handle. That's what I came to know that day."

"What scars?" Her heart skipped a beat in nervous tension.

Nana said, "...He is a raped child."

Caihong froze. Her eyes widened in shock. "W-what!?"

She solemnly nodded. "His mother was assaulted by a drunkard one day and... that's how he was conceived."

Caihong felt as if she would collapse any moment. It was hard to believe and digest. Her mind spun thinking of so many things that she found it hard to hold her ground. Her mouth went dry.

"His mother couldn't afford the expenses of raising a child and grudgingly, she had to depend on him."

She was horrified. "What? So she lived with the man who raped her?"

"She had no choice. She had no parents and relatives to support her and not much is known about Xiaosi's mother. Uncle Sun said that the day she brought him to the orphanage, she broke down into tears and somehow told him what happened. That man didn't live up to his promise and soon began abusing her. Even Xiaosi wasn't spared. He beat both mother and son too badly. After four years, she couldn't bear it anymore and ran away with Xiaosi. But she had no money to take care of him, so she…"

Caihong was stunned the whole time she listened to her.

"That means Xiaosi was four at that time."

"Yes. She left him at the orphanage in front of him. She thought that Xiaosi was small so he wouldn't understand."

Nana sadly smiled. "But adults underestimate children too much. Children understand everything. Isn't that why Siying chose to run away, too, when he misunderstood that Xinyi was going to leave him at an orphanage?"

Caihong trembled and unknowingly, tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Uncle Sun had said that when his mother left him, Xiaosi said nothing. He didn't react. He didn't cry or cause any scene even though he knew that she wasn't going to ever return. Later, when Xiaosi grew more comfortable with Uncle, he admitted that he didn't cause a fuss because he understood his mother's predicament. She had suffered a lot in her own way. He saw it with his own eyes how they lived their lives. If letting him go made her life easier for her, he would gladly let her do it."