Chapter 364: Samael’s Dilemma!
Chapter 364: Samael’s Dilemma!
They made fun of me.
The ungrateful little punks I’d literally saved from certain death had the audacity to make fun of me.
Instead of chiseling statues to commemorate my bravery, composing songs in my honor, or making public proclamations of my valor… they made fun of me!
All I got was just snarky remarks about my ’dress’ and pitying looks because I was spooning a five-foot golden greatsword.
Ingrates, I tell you! Every last one of them!
I had performed the impossible, and this was the thanks I got? Ugh! I hated them all!
Anyway, after Ray was done recording my embarrassing moments for posterity and Michael stopped treating me like a high-needs toddler, we circled back to the matter at hand.
“So… what do we do?” Alexia had finally asked, and though her voice was calm, I could detect some sharpness in it. “Do we go after Jake? I don’t like the idea of a divine weapon in the hands of someone… someone unstable.”
I scowled, narrowing my eyes. “Wow. Okay. That really sounded like a jibe at me.”
“Well, if the shoe fits…”
“What?!”
“—I said the ship is what fits, everyone!” Alexia shouted in response, flailing a finger toward the general direction of the half-finished vessel on the shoreline. “The hull and the crab shells! They fit together perfectly! It’s a structural miracle! Just look at it — because I can’t — and tell me how beautiful it is!”
I scowled harder.
She was terrible at distracting. But, since I only had one arm to strangle her with, and that one arm was currently devoted to spooning my sword, I let her insolence slide.
Besides, I was thinking about her suggestion.
She had a point.
Should we go after Jake?
With Kang and Lily in our ranks, tracking him down wouldn’t be so difficult. But the real problem was what came next.
Jake had definitely reached B-rank.
On paper, we outnumbered him, sure.
But physically and mentally, none of us were in any condition to face a strong enemy right now.
Especially since there was still a hard journey ahead. We still had to sail across the Lake of Grief to reach my father’s Sanctuary.
Yes, the thought of letting that oversized pig slip away left a bitter taste in my mouth.
And I knew it was going to be a choice that would come back to bite me later, because Asmodeus had already warned me that he was going to make Jake the Tenth Demon Prince.
I thought back to everything I knew about the Queen of Black Rot. And to think there would exist something, or someone, even more powerful than her in the future…
A cold shiver ran up my spine.
It was a chilling thought.
“Tsk,” I clicked my tongue. But I had no choice. We couldn’t go after him now. We were exhausted, mentally and physically. If we engaged Jake right now, I had a sinking feeling that at least one of us would die.
Michael alone was formidable with just Xaldreth’s assistance. But Jake had an even higher-ranked Demon Prince aiding him.
He was definitely going to be a fatal challenge if we engaged him in our current state.
So, no. I decided against Alexia’s suggestion.
I couldn’t risk anyone dying. We had survived this far with a tonload of luck and a lot of strategy. I wasn’t about to make a wrong call and throw all that away to satisfy my ego.
“No,” I said firmly. “We won’t pursue Jake. We need to focus on getting out of here.”
No one argued.
•••
The mood around the camp had grown a bit dry.
I noticed that many of them were still uneasy around Michael, which made sense. He had tried to kill them all, after all. And Lily was still giving him a wide berth.
I felt bad.
So, I decided to gather everyone around.
Most of them were hesitant. We had taken a long break only a few hours ago, and there was still a lot of work to do.
But when I reminded them that the tranquility of mind was just as important as the rest of the body, they reluctantly agreed.
…Okay, maybe I threw a small tantrum to push the point. But it worked. They did agree in the end.
“Sam, there’s still a ton of work left, you know?” Vince whined. “We haven’t harvested enough shells for the hull. We also need to—”
“Oh, shut up, you virgin!” I cut him off.
“I’m not—”
“Let’s do something fun!” I interrupted again, grinning mischievously. He rolled his eyes, and so did the others.
“Like what?” Ray asked with a raised brow.
“Like,” I said conspiratorially, leaning forward, “distributing the loot!”
Silence.
Utter silence.
Michael blinked at me in that silence and tilted his head. “Uh… what loot?”
I looked back at him like he was stupid. “The fuck do you mean what loot? The artifacts we got from the God Who Eats Is. What else?”
Again, utter silence.
It was Alexia’s turn to regard me confusedly. “Uh… Sam? We thought you’d take all that loot. Since… well, you killed the creature alone. It was your effort.”
To be fair, it was more of a Deus ex machina moment than anything else — a situation where I got a perfectly timed, absurdly convenient temporary power-up that let me kill a fallen god when I needed it most.
Not exactly something I could reproduce at will, so calling it my effort felt like a stretch.
Still… I wasn’t complaining that it worked.
“Nonsense,” I said with a casual wave of my hand. “We’ll distribute the loot. I’m not being generous. There are reasons. One, a human can’t bind more than a certain number of soulbound relics to their soul at once. That number depends on their Soul Rank. For me, that’s two or three right now. I already have my baby Aurieth. That leaves room for only two more, and there are far too many artifacts to hoard. So, we share. And two… the journey isn’t over yet. The last stretch is going to be brutal. We need everything distributed properly to maintain power balance.”
After a few shared glances a bit more convincing, everyone nodded in agreement.
“Okay, so, if we’re sharing, I’ll take the disc—”
I grabbed Vince’s hand just as he stood, yanking him back down onto his spot. He looked at me with confusion.
“Not so fast, boy,” I said, my grin widening so much it was probably scary since everyone visibly shuddered.
“What… are you thinking?” Juliana dared to ask, recognizing the wicked glee in my eyes.
“Oh, I’m so glad you asked!” I smacked my thigh, overjoyed. “Because this is going to be fun!”
•••
Preparation took a little time — maybe half an hour, tops.
By the end, I had fashioned a pair of benches and a center table out of packed sand and dirt. And more importantly, I selected the Vajra to bind to myself.
The process was simple, if slightly dramatic.
I let it drink a bit of my Essence-infused blood, and soon enough, I could shoot lightning bolts from the metallic scepter at will.
It wasn’t as glorious as my darling Aurieth, nothing would ever be, but it was still a top-tier Divine Artifact.
Once I was satisfied, it was time to call the team.
Obviously, they all looked slightly apprehensive.
“Samael,” Michael said, his one good eye full of fatigue and dread, “whatever you’re planning, please remember we are currently stranded in a death forest and I am very, very tired.”
“Oh, hush!” I chirped, waving the metallic scepter in my hand, letting the azure jewels embedded in its spherical heads catch the diffused moonlight and gleam ominously. “This is for your own good! It’ll be a team-building exercise!”
Then I signalled Juliana to bring out the rest of the Divine Artifacts — the khopesh, the serrated disc, the trident, the storage ring, the movement ring, the warhammer, the ceremonial dagger, and the crooked staff. The full array of our shiny new toys!
“So, my dear unwilling contestants, we’re going to play a game! I call it… Samael’s Dilemma! The rules are simple: Two of you sit across from each other. There will be two items on your table. You each have a choice — Cooperate or Betray. If you both cooperate, you split the items fairly. If one betrays while the other cooperates… the traitor takes everything, and the nice person gets electrocuted!” I laughed an evil, rolling sort of laugh that made my own hairs stand on end. “And! If you both
try to betray each other… both of you get electrocuted!”
I held the Vajra aloft and let a few sparks crackle from its tip, just to emphasize the electrocuted part. “Michael! Juli! You’re up first!”
Michael sighed, shooting a glance at the ceremonial dagger and stone ring on the table, then at Juliana. “Sam, this is childish. Julia, let’s just cooperate. We both need weapons for the journey ahead.”
Juliana’s expression was unreadable at first, then she put on a smile that didn’t quite reach those razor-sharp blue eyes. “Okay. It is the logical choice, anyway.”
“Wonderful! Write your choices on the clay tablets in front of you,” I raised a partition between them so they couldn’t peek at each other.
Once they were finished scribbling, I snatched the tablets with a bit of dramatic flourish.
“Michael chose… Cooperate! How sweet! How loyal and noble and trusting… aww!” I tried to clap, though only one hand was available for gestures. “And Juliana chose… Betray!”
Michael’s face immediately went as pale as a ghost. He looked at Juliana, who was calmly scooping the dagger and ring into her hands.
“…J-J-Julia?” he stammered. “Y-You said it was the logical choice!”
“It was,” she replied, already walking away with the smug cat. “Logic being that I get everything and you get nothing.”
“Bwahahaha!” I nearly toppled over from laughter. “Oh, the betrayal! The drama! And now for your punishment, you fucking loser!”
Before Michael could react, I pressed the tip of the Vajra against his side, letting the sparks ignite.
KTTTZZZ—!!
“ARGHHHH!” Michael screamed and thrashed helplessly, before collapsing on the ground. “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP, SAM!”
“Next! Vince and Ray!” I shouted, ignoring the death threats.
The two best friends shuffled forward, looking equally horrified and suspicious. Ray was nervously rubbing his missing hand against his tunic while Vince gulped anxiously.
“Look, Vince,” Ray turned, “we’ve been through hell. I’m down a hand and you’re down a shoulder blade. We’re brothers, right? We cooperate. No tricks. No. Tricks!”
“Yeah! Totally!” Vince nodded back quickly. “Brothers to the end!”
“Brothers to the end!”
They sat, scribbled, and I grabbed the tablets.
“And for the reveal!” I shouted theatrically. “Vince chose… Betray! And Ray chose… well, would you look at that? Betray!”
Distraught, they both grabbed their heads and were about to yell at each other. But before they could protest, I sent a thin tendril of electricity zapping them in quick succession.
—KRAZZZZZ!
“OH GOD WHY?!” Vince crumpled like a house of cards, smoke curling from his hair. “WHY, YOU FUCKING TRAITOR!”
“I PANICKED!” Ray wailed beside him, convulsing under aftershocks.
I nearly fell onto my back, clutching the Vajra and howling in laughter so hard my ribs hurt. “This is the best day of my life!”
The rest of the group watched in horror.
Alexia was backing up slowly, Lily was clearly thinking about a way to cheat with her foresight, and Kang… looked totally resigned. He was blankly staring at the charred sand where Vince had now passed out with foam building at the corner of his mouth, probably seeing himself in the blue-haired boy.
“Alright! Who’s next?” I asked, holding another item like an auctioneer. “Alexia? Lily? Don’t be shy! Let’s see how much you ladies really trust each other!”
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