Novel Full 453 Confession Amidst Tears
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Erika cried for hours to no end and didn’t let go of me. She didn’t wanted to eat anything either or continued crying until falling asleep in my arms. I brought her to her bed and we called the village chief and our parents to bring Erika’s father body outside.
By the traditions of the village, we were going to do a small ceremony and then his body would be burned by Holy Flames, turned into Ashes, which would then be buried. People didn’t bury whole bodies into the ground in this world due to the chances of them becoming Undead.
Therefore if the body is in a good state, a small ceremony with the body inside of a coffin will be done, where people will place flowers, candles, and other offerings to the deceased. Such offerings are not to the person but to the Holy Spirits, asking them to bring the soul of the deceased to a good afterlife, or even giving them a second chance at life with reincarnation.
Therefore, today in the morning I woke Erika from her bed. I had decided to stay in her home while everyone else was preparing things, taking care of her.
“Erika, good morning.”
“Mwuh…? Blake? AH!”
Erika quickly sat down in her bed, looking around.
She ran towards her father’s room, finding nothing in it.
“W-Where did papa go?”
“A ceremony will begin soon. We need to prepare.”
“B-But…”
“Erika, what were you planning to do, to keep him or something?”
“N-No, that’s not it…”
Erika sighed, sitting in her father’s bed.
I perhaps went a bit harsh there.
I sat at her side, patting her shoulders.
“He lived a long life, Erika. If you respected and loved your father, then you should join the ceremony and leave many offerings.”
“Hmm… I still can’t believe he died… It was just… so sudden.”
“I understand how you feel. And right after Ellergest…”
“Sigh…”
“Erika… I want to apologize to you for this, it was all my fault.”
“Eh?”
“I was the one with the idea of giving you a new body right away, the sooner the better… But in doing so, I forced your father to help me do things right away. Maybe if we moved this for later, he would had been able to live longer… Or maybe I should had continued training Alchemy and do it all alone. I am sorry, it was my own forcefulness that brought your father’s death sooner than it should had been.”
“N-No, that’s not right…”
Erika suddenly held my hand.
“You didn’t do it Blake… You’ve been helping papa all this time, since you were little…”
Erika smiled, as she shed a small tear.
“You’re the reason he was able to live for as long as he did, and why I was able to be with him through my childhood…”
“Even then… we are only nine, it was still too soon.”
“I… No, I don’t want to blame anybody for this. And blaming you, the one that has helped me so much… I would never do that.”
“Erika…”
Deep down, since I saw him die that I was tormented by my own inner consciousness, telling me that if I had waited a bit longer, maybe Erika’s father could have lived longer.
“Blake…”
Erika approached her face towards mine.
“You’re… the most important person in my life now… I would never blame you, never.”
“The most… important person? Are you not exaggerating?”
“No… You were there always, why would I?”
Erika’s beautiful eyes shone brightly.
“I love you…”
I already had an idea of her feelings towards me, but I never thought she would confess them to me at such an age, even less after what happened. I suppose her mind had a swirl of emotions she could barely take.
“There, I said it… I-I didn’t want to make it a secret anymore.” Erika sighed, blushing until she turned all red.
“I kind of guessed from long ago.”
“E-Eh?! You did?!”
“I am not clueless you know? Nor I am oblivious either. I can easily read people. It was very easy to guess.”
“N-No way… Uwaahh… W-Why did you never said anything?”
“Why would I?”
“But… Isn’t it weird?”
“Why would it be weird?”
“It is not?”
“No?”
Erika’s eyebrows raised.
“But I thought you didn’t liked me, that you liked… someone else. Elizabeth or even Eleanora…” She said.
“Well… it is complicated.” I said. “But… I do love you as well, Erika.”
“Ahh…”
Erika felt paralyzed.
“However, human lives are fleeting. Well, everyone’s lives. We go through many phases, we think many things, we imagine many things, we change how we were constantly. I imagined you would eventually just find someone else along the way. I didn’t wanted to chain you into loving only me. I’ve never been into any of such things. It is your own decision if you want to stick with me or not, a grumpy kid like me… I bet it would be a torture.”
“Hahaha… Maybe?” Erika giggled. “But I like your grumpiness. You’re always worried, and you’re always thinking how to solve problems. You’re someone I can always trust, always. I doubt I’ll ever change my mind!”
“Well, it is all up to you. Life has many twists.” I sighed, looking into the window.
Erika looked at me while wondering what I meant by that.
“Sometimes… it feels like you’re a bit older than you look like.”
“Hm?”
So she can tell already.
Is this due to the Dryad’s abilities or simply her own deduction?
“Maybe I am the reincarnation of a very old man… Who knows? I sometimes wonder the same thing.”
I’ve been wondering since I was reincarnated. Am I truly the one I was before?
Eleanora has already realized it, and I did so as well.
My previous life is simply another person now.
I am… a completely different one at this point.
I’ve become Blake, not Asmodeus.
Asmodeus cannot truly be considered as the “me” of now anymore, as I’ve become someone completely different.
But his memories, his intellect, his knowledge, and his emotions were inherited to me.
I will continue using these gifts from my previous self and continue my life, protecting those I love, and also… trying to seek answers to the questions of my previous self.
It is the least I could do for him.
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