Chapter 486: Blothopoly

Min and Butch saw people milling around the room and the hallway, glancing at the table. With the next game starting soon, she put Twelve on her shoulder and told Butch, "Save my seat; I'm getting snacks."

He squinted his eyes and said, "You get us a bunch of snacks, and I'll save your seat."

"Deal."

"Deal."

As Min walked away with Twelve on her shoulder in search of sustenance, Twelve spoke with a strange tone to his voice box, "You negotiated a contract so quickly! You are a true veteran of the game. I am feeling better about my recent loss already."

"Good, because I'm going to rely on you to explain things I don't understand, and I want you to point out to me, in a quiet voice, the obvious attacks you see coming at us. Then look for the attack behind the attacks. The people in the next game have played a lot before, and are scary smart."

Twelve rolled his eyestalks. "I have personally spoken to the Master, the smartest of all! Clever two-legs do not frighten me."

That made her laugh, exposing her fangs. Twelve noted how sharp they looked and was happy her laughter did not indicate anger. "We'll see how you feel after the game, but either way, it's going to be a good one." Arms loaded with supplies, she moved to the end of the table where Brad had taken the seat between her and Butch. She approved of that; they might need to form a tight coalition, and Brad was a known quantity, unlike all of the Alphabet. "I don't see Kenji and Yumi. Are we saving them seats?"

Butch replied, still in his Texan persona, "Well, there seems to be a need to scout out the territory, and those two offered to wander off into the wilderness to do just that."

Brad sighed, "This is happening more and more."

Min looked at the two of them. "What's happening? Scouting?"

Butch said, "Yep, scouting. You may have noticed that Yumi helped Kenji scout the hydroponics a few times last week. They are definitely having fun scouting."

She rolled her eyes, "Ack, the kissy-face stuff again. Not going to catch me doing that anytime soon."

Butch grinned, "And I am so happy to hear that, little sister; it saves me a lot of trouble, telling that handsome Vince fellow that you're too busy to go to the swap meet with him next week. He may have emailed me a couple of times."

The large orc stared down at the gnome. "Why is he sending you emails?"

Brad said, "Now, now, no fighting when I'm between you. Butch is handling things for you in the traditional manner of the older brother. Vince doesn't want to get on his bad side, and by sending the request to Butch, he avoids the possibility of a bad case of bruises."

Min growled low in her chest, "Don't hurt Vince and tell him to meet me at the chili dog stand at noon on the day of the next swap meet up."

Butch grinned at her and snapped a salute. "I'll pass your acceptance along. But on the subject of chili dogs, that's something the Bradster and me have to work on tomorrow. The habitat is funding the food stands for the big swap meets, and we have to source a few tons of high-quality chili and processed meat products."

Brad turned to Butch, "That's going to be a rush order and a big job. I had no idea we went through so much last time."

"It is, but I have an ace in the hole. Milo mentioned someone named Frank, a wizard of procurement. Let's give him a yell as soon as we log out." As more people took their seats, they forgot the rigors of their jobs for a bit as they dropped into Game Mode. There were four chairs on three sides of the table, leaving the last side open. Currently, large stacks of ivory game pieces were stacked there. Belinda was the next to take a seat, next to Min at the side across from the tokens. Zander and Algernon took seats across from Nina and Onyx. Bork was on monitor duty and worried about something. Boom-Boom and Narwal came sauntering into the room, both packing kegs of alcohol that they put on the sideboard. They pulled a large flagon each and sat down next to Nina. Boom-Boom immediately started looking at the board.

Zander quipped, "It will be a few turns before we get large buildings made for you to blow up."

The dwarf looked at him. "Now why would you think that would be my strategy? We have here a lovely example of a resource-allocation problem with competitive economic elements, worker placement, and random disasters. I will be applying my hard-earned Engineering skills to solving the problem and maximizing my score."

Narwal took a long pull from her flagon, "And if you get in his way, I'll blow you to kingdom come."

Algernon elbowed his brother in the side, "Good going, you attacked one dwarf and triggered their mutual defense pack, and have painted a target on yourself."

"What are you talking about? They're married!"

Stolen novel; please report.

Algernon shook his head. "You have so much to learn about dwarves. I weep for you at times, but since I'm in the line of fire by happening to sit next to you, I'll do my best to help you out for a small fee."

There was loud giggling from the hallway, heralding the arrival of Rosie and Buttercup, along with a tub full of small snails. They waved to everyone, while Number Twelve said something rude to the other smart snails. "We heard there was a game and the snails said they used to play it, but were really sad they couldn't watch, so we brought them along. It will help turn them into happy snails."

Rosie held up one of the snails, now with a smooth, clean shell painted bright pink with blue flowers. "And doesn't number Six look great? We're going to give all the smart snails new looks. No more old, stinky shells."

Buttercup held up number Seven, with a brilliant Battlesnail Blue paint job. "It makes it a lot easier to tell them apart." They began to set the snails on top of stacks of books on the sideboard behind the two empty chairs. The chairs didn't stay there long. Rosie grabbed the heavy furniture and effortlessly moved it to the side. Then looked at Algernon, "Sure would be polite of you two to squish down a little toward that end and make room for my sister and me."

Algernon's eyes got big, and he and Zander quickly moved their chairs. The girls knelt on the floor, their heads still higher than the people seated in chairs. Then they took off their backpacks and pulled out notepads and pencils. "The snails told us this was a really hard game to play, so they're helping us out. But it looks sort of like the map to a city. My sister and I are getting really good with maps, and we love games. Number One told us it was all about exploiting weakness and taking out our enemies one by one while we kept everyone from killing us. Seems like fun!"

They both smiled, exposing their large sets of teeth and slowly looked from one person to another, staring until they blinked. Then giggled and began doodling on their notepads.

Butch said from the other end of the table, "Seems like the game is already getting underway and we're into the pre-game psychology phase."

Belinda had managed to stare down Rosie for ten seconds before something told her to look away. She'd wondered if the girls were up to such a serious game, but not anymore. "Are we ready to get started?"

The snails all cheered, and number One started speaking loudly, "Welcome, one and all, to our latest game of Blothopoly. We've got a great show for you tonight and a packed table, with the maximum number of twelve players attending. We will be playing the Wisopekan-Double-Decker rules today, as explained in the main rulebook. Each player may select two tiles from the Minor Resources, Minions, Dirty Tricks, Obscure Laws, Random Occurrences, Easy Money, or Who-You-Know stacks. For the first three turns, resources must be placed in the Slave, Manufacturing, or Foreign sectors of the city unless you have a connection to a Noble House or Ur-Khemyst Society. Dice will be rolled to see who takes the first turn. That person may select two tiles, keeping one and tossing the other face up into the Resources pile. The person to their left will then select three tiles, keeping one and discarding two. This progression will go around the table until the sixth person. After that, the seventh player will take three tiles, keeping two. The eighth player will take four, keeping two, and so on. Please roll 12d12, discarding 7s, 4s, and 2s, then total your dice to see who goes first. Dice must be dropped from six inches above the table or higher, and roll no less than three times. Ready to play? Then pick up your dice and..."

"Not so fast!"

Milo walked into the room. He had a lovely charcuterie board and a red fizzy drink with a parasol. He set them on a small table, then walked out of the room, returning with an oversized and comfortable-looking chair with the number "13" carved into wood on the sides. He placed it at the empty end of the table. "It would be a shame to miss such a good game. I can continue my research tomorrow. Then he sat down.

All of the snails hissed and wailed loudly. Number One screamed, "That is the MASTER'S CHAIR! No one sits in the Master's Chair! Sacrilege! Peril! The End of Days!"

Milo snapped his fingers, and said in the Master's Voice, "Silence." And the snails stopped, and sat very still, quivering. He looked at them. "It is indeed the End of Days. The Master is Dead, and I am sitting in his chair. I'm sure you are smart enough to understand the meaning behind that. Now, let's play Blothopoly." He winked at Rosie and Buttercup, who clapped their hands and reached for their dice.