Chapter 23: Sanity Help

Chapter 23: Chapter 23: Sanity Help

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I can’t stay here like this, I might put them in worry.

I stood up from where I was sitted, I tried my possible best to go back to normal. Covering my expression with my usual mask but then I heard it again.

"Mummy"

It was distant from my current position or so I thought, my expression darkened from fear and anticipation, my heart racing faster but each passing second.

"Oota?"

Voice spoke my name this time I could feel the child right next to me, her voice vibrating close to my ear. My eyes widened, I quickly turned behind me seeing nothing just the rain, distant thunder sound and lightning flashes on the sky. The sky was like a dark fog with no hope of there ever been a clear sky or even the sun.

The lock turned. The door swings open, admitting a gust of damp, chilled air that smelled of ozone and wet asphalt. I stood there. My shoulders hunched, my uniform dampened by the rain, my chest heaving in shallow, jagged rhythms.

A girl stepped toward me, her movements fluid and ghost-like. She looked up, her dull, void-red eyes within her fallen hair searching my face. There was no spark of life in those irises, only a deep, stagnant crimson.

A curtain of ink-black hair cascaded over the cushions, spilling onto the floor like a slow-moving oil slick. She wore a a long black nightgown.

My cousin, Erza. Aunt Yamaguchi-san’s daughter stood barefoot in the hallway

Her features was of that of 6 year old, short and vulnerable.

"You’re late, Brother," she murmured.

Her voice was a velvet whisper, sweet and low, but a tremor of anxiety vibrated beneath the surface.

She must have been worried about me.

I didn’t look at her. I didn’t look at anyone. I kicked off my shoes with a frantic energy, the leather scuffing harshly against the hardwood. I stepped past them, my gaze locked on the stairs.

"Kageyama kun?" Another voice called out, her voice warm but laced with confusion. "Are you hungry? I’m making the beef stew you like, your favourite-"

A woman named Maria, dressed in green apron, this was a home keeper assigned at the house. She stood at the livingroom, her worry voice following me.

I couldn’t look at her face, I felt too detached for some reasons I couldn’t even began to put into words.

She must be worried, but even if that’s it. I can’t.

"I’m not hungry."

The words were clipped, thrown over my shoulder like a weapon.

"But you haven’t eaten since-"

"I’m tired, Maria! I’m just... I’m going to my room."

How can I explain? They will think I’m crazy, I don’t want them involved.

I don’t even know what’s happening, I’m too scared to think properly.

I didn’t wait for a response. I bolted up the stairs, the thud of my footsteps echoing with a desperate urgency. A moment later, the heavy oak door of my bedroom slammed shut, followed by the definitive, metallic click of the lock. Silence returned to the living room.

Upstairs, i leaned my back against the locked door, my breath coming in ragged gasps. I felt as though the air in the room had turned to lead. My vision blurred, the edges of the room flickering with a phantom static.

I lunged for the bathroom, barely making it to the sink before my stomach revolted. I gripped the porcelain edges of the basin, my knuckles turning white. I retched violently, vomiting into the sink, the sound echoing off the sterile tiles.

Tears leaked from my eyes, hot and uncontrolled. I wasn’t just sick, i was vibrating. A primal, visceral terror had lodged itself in ny marrow, refusing to let go.

I stayed there for a long time, forehead pressed against the cold mirror, my breath fogging the glass. When i finally looked up, i recoiled.

The reflection staring back was a stranger. My eyes were bloodshot, my face drained of color, my expression one of absolute exhaustion.

Who was that?...

The question looped in my mind, a broken record. The alley. The rain. The child.

I could still see it, the way the small figure had flickered. It hadn’t been a movement; it had been a glitch. A frame of reality skipping, a tear in the fabric of the world. The child’s hand had merged with the man’s for a split second, the pixels of their existence blurring into a distorted, grey smudge.

I slid down the wall, hitting the floor with a dull thud. I curled into a fetal position, my hands covering my ears as if i could shut out the memory of that high-pitched, echoing voice.

Mommy?...

I shuddered, a violent tremor racking my frame. I felt a sudden, suffocating sense of insignificance, as if the world i knew was merely a thin veil draped over something monstrous and incomprehensible.

This wasn’t even making any sense.

Slowly, i crawled toward my bed and collapsed onto the mattress. I didn’t bother removing my damp clothes. I lay there, staring at the ceiling, watching the shadows of the rain-streaked window dance across the plaster.

My breathing eventually slowed, though my heart still hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs. I reached for my phone on the nightstand.

The screen illuminated my pale face. I scrolled through my contacts, my thumb hovering over Shion’s name.

I stopped.

I can’t. She’s finally smiling again. I can’t drag her into... whatever this is....

I closed the app and scrolled further down. I needed someone who didn’t offer comfort. I didn’t need a shoulder to cry on; i needed an explanation. I needed someone who looked at the world and saw the gears turning beneath the surface.

I tapped a name.

Mataguchi.

The phone rang once. Twice. On the third ring, the line clicked open. There was no ’hello’, no greeting. Only the sound of the rain drops pouring down and the distant, roaming of cars.

You’re breathing too fast," Mataguchi’s voice came through the receiver. It was flat, devoid of warmth, yet it acted like an anchor, pulling me back from the edge of my panic.

I closed my eyes, a single tear escaping and soaking into the pillow. "Mataguchi," i whispered, my voice cracking. "I saw something. In a alleway..."

He won’t believe me.

"I-I uh...I don’t know how I should say this.."

"I’m scared I’m going insane."

I am....insane, that’s the only explanation.

"..."

Mataguchi didn’t respond, it was silent on his part, just the rain was heard.

"Uh..hello" i called out.

"I’m still here. Can you hear the rain on my end? Just focus on that sound. It’s consistent. It’s real. I’m standing right outside your gate, soaked to the bone. You’re safe in that bed." He responded, I could hear him moving, step by step in his house?

No the rain wasn’t distant it was outside.

"You are outside... on the rain?" I asked.

"It’s alright, I’m with an umbrella...just went out to convenient store to get some snacks and drinks" Mataguchi replied his voice remaining same and unchanging.

"Uh oh okay" i shuttered, I wasn’t confident at all. Anyone could tell of they are listening into our conversation.

"It’s alright, so tell me....what happened?"

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"The most detached remains the best listeners and observers"

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