Chapter 302 - 67: Ultimate Magic

Now that he knew why the local nobles were targeting the players, Duan Fei had a new question.

"If the court nobles are at odds with the local nobles, why haven’t they done anything?" Duan Fei asked, confused.

"That’s what confuses us, too," Kate said with a wry smile. "We’re the King’s personal spies. By rights, we should be the ones conducting Reconnaissance here. We’d then provide our findings to the King so he could make a decision. But no matter how we try to contact him, all we get are a few fragmented words."

"What are they?"

Kate looked hesitant, but braced himself and said, "Wah... wah... wah... wah..."

"Alright, alright, that’s enough. It sounds like a baby crying."

"That’s what we thought, too."

After they had shared information, Kate felt the time was right. He looked at Duan Fei and asked, "I have a question for you, as well. Why have you and your friends come here?"

"You might not believe this, but we’re here to beat up the Demon King."

"Aren’t you the Demon King?" Kate asked.

"Now that’s some high-level flattery."

They chatted a while longer, and Kate realized it was getting late.

Standing up, he said to Duan Fei, "It was a pleasure speaking with you. This conversation has been very enlightening. The situation is still uncertain, so we’ll be staying here for a while. Is there anything else you need?"

"I want to know how we can get into the Dungeon."

Kate looked at Duan Fei in confusion. "You’re a Great Mage. You don’t need to ask for anyone’s permission."

It dawned on Duan Fei.

After cheerfully saying goodbye to the three spies, Duan Fei turned to his stream viewers. "Alright, bros, let’s go! Time to pull off something crazy!"

"Let’s do it, Duan Someone. Let’s go string up the Lord of this place like a roast goose."

"Yeah, but let’s learn some Magic from the Witch first. I have no idea how to use it. Also, are you using cheats?"

"Yeah, I was wondering the same thing. Are you using cheats? How much? I’d even pay five thousand a month for it."

"Are you guys stupid? With a cheat like that, you could earn that back in just a few dungeon runs. He might not even be willing to sell for five thousand."

"Good point. In that case, befriend a degenerate like me, and we can seal our filthy friendship with that cheat."

"You perv! Count me in!"

"Same here."

Watching the comments from his viewers, Duan Fei was reminded of just how diverse the player base could be.

Back at the Witch’s Magic Potion Workshop, the Witch herself had woken up and was eating lunch prepared by Cuihua. She sipped an Antidote as she chatted with the impossibly beautiful Jinghong. The moment she saw Duan Fei, however, her expression soured with disgust.

"Duan Someone? You look disgusting. That not-quite-human vibe you’re giving off is so strong... it’s like I’m looking at a walking turd."

"Don’t say such disgusting things while we’re eating," Duan Fei said, annoyed.

"You’re the one cosplaying as a turd, and you have the gall to criticize me?"

Duan Fei could only sheepishly change back. ’So, even when a Profession is maxed out, it can only fool amateurs,’ he thought. ’I still need to master this properly myself.’

After changing back, he hopped onto the dining table and said to the Witch, who was wolfing down her food, "I want to learn Magic. Just show me a few spells, and I’ll pick a couple to learn."

"You think Magic is that easy to learn?" the Witch scoffed. "Magic is an art that values Talent above all else. Even I could only manage to learn a couple of types. If you don’t have the Talent..."

When the Witch suddenly fell silent, Duan Fei asked, "What is it?"

"It’s nothing. I just suddenly feel like teaching you a spell or two wouldn’t be a problem after all."

"Oh? Did you finally recognize my unparalleled, Great Mage-level prowess?"

"...Yes."

Although Duan Fei’s smug attitude irritated her, the Witch had no choice but to admit it.

After all, anyone with even a passing familiarity with Magic, anyone who understood the basics, could see Duan Fei’s current state.

But those with a deeper understanding of Magic would realize that Duan Fei wasn’t a Great Mage at all.

He was Magic itself.

To the Witch, the Duan Fei before her felt as if he could change reality with a single word and create miracles with a single spell.

Before him, even the Pope, also a Great Mage, was nothing. If the Pope offered to warm Duan Fei’s bed, he’d be rejected for being old, past his prime, and having a loose chrysanthemum.

"Strange, he wasn’t like this yesterday," the Witch said to Jinghong, whom she was holding. "Are all you Slimes this absurd?"

"We’re different," Jinghong said seriously.

"So what in the world is the deal with that absurd guy?"

The Witch stared at her bookshelf, lost in thought.

Some spells were too powerful. In the hands of an ordinary Mage, they were manageable, but if Duan Fei were to cast one... she was afraid he could wipe the entire town off the map.

Necromancy was out of the question too. She didn’t want to see corpses climbing from their graves, transformed by terrifying Magic into a Witch Demon King who would drag the entire nation into the shadow of death.

After considering all the options, there was surprisingly only one spell left that was safe to use: Summoning Magic.

The spell’s effect was actually rather niche. It would force its target to recall their past sins, repent, and then dedicate themselves to atoning for their transgressions.

The more sins the target had committed, and the more powerful the caster, the stronger the final effect.

She pulled the heavy tome from the shelf, blew the dust from its cover, and handed it to Duan Fei.

"Alright, study it hard. Once you’ve learned it..."

"Summoning!"

Duan Fei learned the spell in a single second and immediately cast it on the Witch before him.

A pressure like a collapsing mountain bore down on her. The Witch’s soul felt like a lemon in a juicer, squeezed until it ruptured in an instant.

The sins buried deep in her soul were violently squeezed out, causing the Witch to cover her face and burst into tears.

"It’s so painful! Why do I waste so much time in bed every day! I could have accomplished so much more! I’m a pretty girl, too! Why can’t I use all this spare time to improve myself so I can find a good husband?"

"Uh, what about me?" Darts Guest asked hopefully from the side.

"It has to be a human, at least!" Miss Witch continued to cry. "No, I have to improve myself! I’ll start by jogging around the town! I’m going to get pretty and marry a good man!"

"Wait for me! Don’t be so picky about species! Give me a chance!"

Watching the Witch and Darts Guest rush out the door, Duan Fei couldn’t help but sigh. "I’ve had a realization."

"What is it?" Jinghong asked.

"I’ve realized I shouldn’t bother with schemes and plots. I should just be honest and steamroll my way through everything. Jinghong, I reject my humanity!"

"You weren’t human to begin with," Jinghong sighed in exasperation, wondering to herself again, ’What kind of fool could possibly fall for an idiot like this?’

’Fine, I’m that fool.’