Chapter 273: Beside Her

Hanchuan kissed the top of her head, his hand still resting against her waist.

Zhiyi waited for him to say something, wondering if he understood what she was trying to say.

She knew they were different, and she hadn’t meant that being with Jingwei felt exactly like being with him.

But Hanchuan didn’t seem troubled by what she had said. Instead, he drew her closer and brushed his thumb over the hand holding the pen.

"I’m glad he makes you feel that way, sweetheart. You’ve spent enough time being frightened and feeling insecure." He glanced at the page across their laps. "Tell him about the afternoons you spend together. He probably doesn’t know how much they mean to you."

Zhiyi looked down at what she had written.

There were several lines about the things Jingwei had done for her, but nothing about how often she went looking for him when she had no reason to need him.

"Sometimes I take a book so I have something to do while I sit there," she admitted. "Then I keep talking to him and never open it."

Hanchuan smiled against her hair.

He had found them that way often enough, with her book sitting untouched while Jingwei listened to whatever had caught her attention that afternoon.

"Write that down," he told her, moving the paper so she could reach it more easily. "He’ll like knowing you went there for him."

She began another sentence while Hanchuan held the page steady.

This time, she wrote about wanting Jingwei’s company, even when she had nothing to ask him. She liked that he made room for her without making her feel as though she had interrupted something more important.

When she paused, Hanchuan leaned closer to read over her shoulder.

"That sounds more like you," he said, rubbing her waist as she considered the next line. "Keep going. You can fix anything you don’t like when you’re finished."

Having him beside her helped more than she had expected.

She could say something aloud without worrying about getting it right, and he understood what she meant even when she stopped halfway through.

Once, he reminded her of an evening when she had waited for Jingwei to finish his watch because she wanted to show him something she had been reading.

"I could have left the book for him," she said, remembering how tired she had been by the time he returned. "But I wanted to be there when he saw it."

Hanchuan looked at her until she glanced down at the pen in her hand and smiled. She added that too, then read the whole page aloud with her head resting against his shoulder.

By the time she finished, she had stopped frowning. There were still crossed-out words and a sentence squeezed into the margin, but she knew what she would say tomorrow.

Hanchuan took the pen when she loosened her grip and placed it on the bedside table. "You’re done for tonight, sweetheart. I’ll find you a clean sheet in the morning if you want to copy it."

Zhiyi let him set the paper aside, then turned toward him and slipped her arms around his neck.

He had spent most of the evening listening to her talk about Jingwei, and now that she wasn’t worrying about the promises, she wanted to stay close to her husband.

"Thank you for helping me," she murmured, brushing her fingers through his hair.

Hanchuan drew her onto his lap and kissed her before answering. "You don’t have to sit over there struggling on your own. I was right here."

"I thought I should be able to do it," she countered, shaking her head.

"You did do it." His hand moved up her back as she settled against him. "I just kept you company."

Zhiyi smiled and kissed him again. He held her while she leaned into him, then reached for the lamp when she began to yawn.

Her paper stayed beside his book as he brought her beneath the blanket and tucked her against his chest.

She woke the next morning to Hanchuan opening the wardrobe.

Her blue dress hung from the door, and he had laid a clean sheet of paper on the desk beside her promises. When he noticed her watching, he left his shirt unbuttoned and came over to the bed.

"You’ve got time," he told her, bending to kiss her forehead. "Qinghe’s bringing breakfast up. Eat first, then you can get ready."

Zhiyi caught his hand before he straightened and drew him down for another kiss. He smiled against her mouth, staying until a knock at the door made her loosen her hold.

Qinghe came in carrying a tray, with the smell of warm eggs following him. He set it across her lap while Hanchuan sat beside her.

"Zeyu wanted to bring this himself," Qinghe said, handing her a spoon, "but Shichen asked him to leave the cake alone, and now he’s downstairs explaining why he can’t."

Hanchuan laughed as Qinghe pulled up the desk chair.

They stayed with her while she ate, talking about the chairs downstairs and whether Zeyu would let anyone cut the cake without giving instructions first. By the time Qinghe took the tray away, Zhiyi had forgotten to be nervous.

After she washed and copied her promises, Hanchuan helped fasten her dress. She stood in front of the mirror while he gathered the hair near her face and slipped Jingwei’s clip into place above her ear.

"There you are," Hanchuan said, smoothing a loose strand before turning her toward him. "Come and let me look at you."

Zhiyi rested her hands against his shirt while he smiled down at her.

She had seen that look on their own wedding day, and remembering it made her step closer. Hanchuan kissed her, holding her waist until she settled against him.

"You look beautiful, sweetheart," he murmured. "Jingwei’s going to have trouble remembering anything he wrote."

She was still smiling when Shichen came to tell them everyone was ready.

Hanchuan picked up her folded paper and offered his arm, letting her keep hold of him as they went downstairs.

Jingwei stood beside the bookcase in the small sitting room.

Qinghe and Zeyu had taken their seats, while Shichen stopped behind the camera to check the picture. Zhiyi noticed the cloth on the table and the flowers someone had found, but her attention returned to Jingwei when he smiled at her.

Hanchuan walked beside her until they reached him, then placed the folded promises in her hand.

"Take your time," her husband told her, kissing her temple before sitting in the chair nearest them.

Jingwei reached for her free hand, his fingers warm around hers. He glanced at his own page once before setting it on the bookcase.

"I wrote this down because I didn’t want to forget anything," he told her, smiling as he stepped closer. "But there’s something I want to say before I start."