The Villainess and I, her Zombie

"Say, is there some sort of secret reason why people don't try to collect as many titles as possible? Especially you, Roan, shouldn't a future king be as strong as possible?"

Cranberry said, not returning the note but hiding it in her own bag instead.

"Th-that's... I have no excuse for that one, I've been spending a lot of time learning about politics and had almost none to properly train..."

The prince seemed to deflate disheartened.

"Even though my mother is so strong herself, she decided that I should focus on the theoretics instead of strengthening my stats and skills."

He confessed making a bitter face.

"Oh well, chin up mommy's boy, as a Greed you should be more greedy for strength."

Cranberry giggled and discreetly waved at Zombie to come over.

"Graough? (Huh...? What am I supposed to do?)"

Zombie groaned confused but was already by the prince and his master anyway.

"You've heard that?"

Cranberry perked up, put her arm around Roan's shoulders, and pointed at the blue undead.

"My Zombie just offered that he will help you train."

She declared proudly.

"He did?"

"Graough?! (I did?!)"

Understandably, Zombie got even more confused than the prince.

"That's right."

The girl nodded with an overly serious expression.

"Say, Roan, your heavy greatsword proficiency skill is a bit lacking, and I saw that you never learned the rooted skill, which should be the norm for any heavy weapon user... how about you start training at once? While the rest of us will be riding inside the carriage, I will lend you my Zombie as a training dummy, so why won't you hit him a bit while on top of the moving carriage? That method will surely speed up the skill acquisition process."

She smirked smugly, glancing up at the face of the bewildered blond prince.

"The moving...?"

Roan's eyes darted towards the roof of the carriage that didn't look particularly well suited for the training purposes.

"Will it even support our weight?"

He asked but even before he finished asking, Zombie already jumped on top of the carriage and beckoned him.

"Graough. (Get on, weakling prince.) Graough. (Cranberry always knows what's best for training.)"

He growled sounding rather annoyed.

"?!"

Cranberry raised her brows but instead of saying anything at that sudden informal way of addressing her by Zombie, she just got in the carriage and closed the door.

Even without someone translating Zombie's groans for him, the blond prince sighed and joined the blue undead on the unstable training ground.

"Young lady, are you sure it's okay? If they'll fuck up the roof it will be a fucking disaster when it'll start raining."

Lairs, the elven mage, said worried, looking with distress at the indentation in the roof above their heads.

"Not to fucking mention that my defense isn't high enough to protect me from a fucking lump of metal crashing down on my fucking head..."

She complained trying to move as far away as she could from the dangerously looking spots.

It was worth mentioning that Lairs's behavior towards Cranberry changed completely.

Even though the elf was still swearing just as always, she seemed to warm up to the red-haired girl by a lot compared to her previous borderline aggression, and none of her curses were directed directly at Cranberry either.

"Relax, even if something will happen, my Zombie will deal with it. He's really protective towards me."

Cranberry straight up boasted, leaning back in the seat and grinning smugly.

"And since if the armored prince falling through the roof is also something that can easily exceed my DEF, he won't let that happen. Ever."

She giggled and pulled up her shirt, showing off the scars left by a werewolf's teeth.

"He simply won't allow a repeat of this. He's so cute~!"

The red-haired girl was gushing over her eternal servant without even a moment of hesitation, while Lairs froze up momentarily, staring dumbfounded at the muscular stomach in front of her.

"Though he might kill the prince in the process… "

the red-haired girl suddenly furrowed her brows.

"HE CAN FUCKING WHAT?!"

"Young lady, let's call them both down, alright?"

Both Lairs and Rotte - the only other Dandelion inside the carriage, since Uresha and Shanks were steering it - jumped up in panic.

"Relax, I told him to be careful, so it should be fine, I trust him."

Cranberry waved her hand dismissively and declared.

"Oh, and that reminds me."

She gasped and straightened her back while pulling her shirt down.

"Do you still try to hook up with the waitresses in taverns or did you found a nice girl? And you Rotte, any luck with the guys?"

She asked curiously, which caused both Lairs and Rotte to have a coughing fit.

"Wa-wait...! How do you even know that I like girls...?!"

Lairs backed off embarrassed while Rotte started fidgeting nervously on his seat.

"..."

Cranberry closed her mouth and looked away awkwardly.

For a moment there, she forgot that everyone else's memories got changed by the system and in this version of the world the Dandelions never escorted her and Zombie to the Durian's mansion...

...so there literally was no reasonable explanation for where Cranberry knew about these little details of the Dandelions' lives.

All the time Cranberry saw Lairs's failed attempts at wooing the barmaiden and waitresses simply didn't happen in this world.

Not to mention Rotte, who was literally too shy to boldly attempt to flirt in public as Lairs did, and mentioned his tastes only once and not even directly to Cranberry.

"I've heard someone in the guild joking about it while I registered. You are quite famous."

Cranberry forged the most probable excuse on the spot and shrugged her shoulders indifferently.

"Oh, and they talk about Rotte too..."

She added, trying to shift the attention from herself.

"Those blabbermouths..."

"Fuckers, and I thought that after the end of the fucking lull, they would stop fucking gossiping about people's private matters because they will be too busy with missions!"

The two adventurers growled angrily and frowned.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

Cranberry actually apologized, though she didn't even try to bow her head.

"No, no, it's okay, young lady. It's just that having some fuckers talk behind your back all the fucking time is really fucking annoying."

Lairs scowled and started tapping her fingers on her leg.

"Oh, and as for the fucking answer. No. I didn't found anyone... fuck me... If I had the fucking time to properly meet more people, I'm sure there would be someone fucking interested, but fucking funnily enough being an adventurer doesn't leave much fucking time for private adventures."

Lairs complained and Rotte let out a long sigh and nodded in agreement.

"Well then. Don't I have a nice book for you two...!"

Cranberry's eyes lighted up as she reached towards her bag.