Chapter 74: HE WAS STARTING TO HAVE AN EFFECT ON HIM

Li Yan and Gu Jun continued talking for some time, discussing cultivation, their experiences within the sect, and everything that had happened since Li Yan became Fu Hanzheng’s disciple. The conversation remained easy and relaxed until Li Yan finally noticed how late it had become.

By then, the sun had already begun sinking toward the horizon, and there was little reason for him to remain any longer.

He stood and prepared to leave, remembering that he would not need to see Fu Hanzheng until the first day of the week. That gave him two extra days to rest and sleep in before his lessons resumed. He bid Gu Jun farewell and promised to send his share of the high-grade mana stones as soon as they arrived, then finally left the residence.

The sun was setting by the time Li Yan began walking back toward Purple Mountain, and the sky had turned into a mixture of warm colors that stretched across the horizon.

The cool evening breeze brushed against his face as he followed the familiar path toward his residence, and the peaceful journey gave him enough time to think about what he wanted to accomplish over the next two days. He decided that after eating and taking a bath, he would cultivate for a while before sleeping.

Tomorrow could then be spent studying the manuals Fu Hanzheng had given him.

That plan changed when he reached his house and found Hu Bai sitting near the front door with an expression that immediately told Li Yan he was angry. Li Yan slowed down as he approached, already preparing himself for a long lecture about where he had gone and why he had suddenly disappeared after being escorted home by Fu Hanzheng.

Hu Bai, however, did not ask him anything about his whereabouts.

The silence unsettled Li Yan more than the expected questioning would have, particularly when Hu Bai stood and began walking toward him without saying a word. Li Yan instinctively took a step backward, and Hu Bai stopped when he noticed the movement.

"Do not be afraid. I will not hurt you. I just want to know."

Hu Bai reached toward Li Yan’s head and carefully removed the hairpin he had given him earlier. He held it between his fingers while looking at the ornament with a faintly troubled expression before turning his attention back to Li Yan.

"I just want to know why my hairpin was not good enough for you."

Li Yan sighed when he understood what had been bothering him. There was little point in avoiding the question, so he decided to answer honestly.

"I understand that we are not hiding our engagement, but why did you not tell me the hairpin was a bridal one? Must you let the whole world know I am engaged?"

Hu Bai sighed as he examined the hairpin. Not many people knew that it was a bridal hairpin, so he could not help wondering who had told Li Yan. His thoughts briefly settled on Fu Hanzheng, and the possibility immediately irritated him.

How annoying.

He returned his attention to Li Yan and gave the simplest explanation he could think of.

"They keep the bees away."

Li Yan stared at him for a moment before his expression became increasingly incredulous. He looked at the hairpin and then back at Hu Bai, clearly wondering how such an explanation was supposed to justify an ornament that announced his engagement to anyone who recognized it.

"I am fifteen. I need a life too. I do not want to be held down by the constraints of marriage."

He wanted to have friends and meet people, but if anyone found out he was engaged to Hu Bai and was intimidated by him. They would not want to have a close relationship with him.

Hu Bai was older, so he had the tendency to do whatever he felt was right without caring about his feelings.

’For your benefit’ was not always enough to soothe an aching heart.

Anyone with plans of marriage should always communicate with their partners. Age, power, rank, become nothing when two people decide to become one. They owed each other that respect.

He was not angry that Hu Bai had given him that bridal hairpin; he was the one who was ignorant and wore it without confirming what it actually was.

What he felt was disrespect. Since they were engaged, why did he not tell him he was giving him a bridal hairpin? Perhaps he would have come up with ways to defend why he was wearing it.

But Hu Bai didn’t give him that, so he took it off.

"I do not accept that answer, and I want an apology. I may be young, but I am not naive or a fool. We are engaged, so that makes us a team. You do not deliberately hide things from your partner. You share; if you are angry or sad or even jealous, you can tell me. You should have gotten my opinion first; you made me feel foolish when I found out what it was."

Hu Bai’s eyes widened as he finally realized what he had done. He had convinced himself that hiding the truth was acceptable if it benefited Li Yan, yet he had never considered that Li Yan deserved a say in matters concerning their engagement.

He had deceived him about the hairpin and then become angry when Li Yan removed it, despite having no right to blame him for reacting to information he had never been given.

"I am sorry. I should have told you what the hairpin was before giving it to you, and I should have asked what you wanted instead of making the decision for you. I will take your feelings into consideration from now on, and I will be more open with you."

Li Yan’s expression eased when he heard the apology, but Hu Bai still seemed reluctant to end the conversation. After a brief hesitation, he admitted what had really bothered him earlier.

"I was jealous when I saw Fu Hanzheng holding your hand. I wanted to hold it too."

He looked at Li Yan seriously before adding, "I will not go any further than that."

Li Yan sighed. Hu Bai liked being physical, but he had made his boundary clear and promised to respect it. That was enough for Li Yan to accept his apology, so he extended his hand toward him.

Hu Bai gently took it and pressed a soft kiss against the back of Li Yan’s hand before intertwining their fingers. The familiar warmth of another person’s hand should have felt comforting, yet Li Yan immediately noticed that this was different from holding Fu Hanzheng’s hand earlier. His master had made him feel safe and relaxed, while Hu Bai’s touch made warmth creep into his face and sent his heartbeat into a rapid rhythm.

Li Yan lowered his eyes, suddenly unsure where to look as he became painfully aware of how close they were standing. He had not expected something as simple as holding hands to affect him this much.

Hu Bai really did have an effect on him.