Chapter 72: CAN—CAN I TOUCH IT?

Li Yan happily let Fu Hanzheng hold his hand as they walked back toward the residential area. The day’s events had left him in a particularly good mood, and having his master beside him made that feeling even stronger.

Fu Hanzheng had treated him well since accepting him as a disciple, patiently teaching him, defending him when Elder Shen tried to deny his compensation, and even taking the trouble to escort him home afterward. Li Yan had never been accustomed to having someone look after him so openly, and the simple kindness made him feel unusually content.

As they approached the familiar residential area, Li Yan continued chatting with Fu Hanzheng until a familiar figure appeared among the disciples coming from the opposite direction. The moment he recognized Hu Bai, the ease on his face disappeared, and he instinctively tried to withdraw his hand.

Fu Hanzheng immediately noticed the movement and tightened his hold, keeping Li Yan’s hand firmly in his own.

"There is no need to be afraid of a core disciple when your master is here."

Li Yan glanced at him and realized that Fu Hanzheng had no intention of letting him retreat simply because Hu Bai was approaching. He quietly relaxed his fingers and continued walking beside his master, although his attention remained on the two people coming toward them.

Hu Bai noticed them as well, and his expression changed when his gaze landed on Fu Hanzheng’s hand wrapped around Li Yan’s. A faint displeasure appeared in his eyes, but he did not say anything or make any attempt to approach. His gaze remained fixed on their joined hands for several moments before he finally looked away.

Hu Biyan noticed the prolonged stare and quietly reminded him, "You have been looking for too long."

Hu Bai’s expression stiffened, and he immediately shifted his attention elsewhere. He continued walking beside Hu Biyan without acknowledging Fu Hanzheng or Li Yan, even though they passed close enough that a proper greeting would have been expected.

Li Yan watched them walk past as though the two of them did not exist. Most disciples would have stopped to greet Fu Hanzheng when encountering the head of the Apothecary Department, especially outside the department, but Hu Bai had neither slowed his pace nor offered a greeting. His earlier reaction to their joined hands had been obvious enough, yet he had still chosen to ignore them completely.

Fu Hanzheng glanced after the two core disciples before turning his attention back to the path ahead. His expression had become faintly displeased, and Li Yan could already guess what was going through his master’s mind.

"What an insolent brat. Core disciples truly are pompous, especially that Hu Bai. Humph."

Li Yan did not say anything in response to Fu Hanzheng’s remark about Hu Bai. He already knew enough about that man to understand that speaking carelessly would only create another problem for himself. If his master asked about their relationship later, he could deal with it then, but there was no reason to volunteer information now and leave himself scrambling to explain an unnecessary lie.

Still, he could not allow Fu Hanzheng to keep criticizing Hu Bai when he was the one who had failed to explain the situation properly.

So before they reached his residence, Li Yan gently withdrew his hand and stopped beside the path.

"Master, I just remembered that I have somewhere I need to be, so I will not be going back to my residence directly."

Fu Hanzheng looked at him with mild surprise, and Li Yan immediately bowed before he could ask too many questions.

"Thank you for escorting me today. Please take care of yourself until we see each other again."

Without waiting for Fu Hanzheng’s response, Li Yan turned around and hurried away. He did not slow down until he was certain that Fu Hanzheng was no longer following him, after which he changed direction and headed toward Gu Jun’s residence.

He needed someone to talk to, and Gu Jun was the most suitable person he could think of. Although they were only a year apart in age, Gu Jun had experienced far more of the world than he had, and perhaps he would have enough wisdom to help him make sense of the mess surrounding Hu Bai.

When Li Yan reached the residence, he found Gu Jun’s roommates sitting together in the courtyard. One was eating while the other appeared to be studying, yet neither seemed particularly interested in anything beyond each other. They sat close enough that Li Yan wondered whether the two were secretly in love.

He did not stare long enough to satisfy his curiosity. After giving them a respectful bow, he made his presence known.

"I am looking for Gu Jun."

The darker-skinned young man with a scar beneath his lower lip pointed toward the residence.

"You will find him two rooms down. Either eating or sleeping. That is all he does in there."

Li Yan thanked him, but the young man had already returned his attention to his companion and showed no indication that he had heard. Seeing no reason to interrupt them further, Li Yan left the two alone and entered the residence to find Gu Jun himself.

As he walked down the corridor, Xiaoxiao’s voice suddenly sounded in his mind.

"Sodomy is not widely accepted in this world. Even with the existence of Gers and Omegas, which makes society somewhat more lenient toward them, ordinary men caught in such relationships are still treated far more harshly. Love, however, has never been particularly obedient to social rules. Sometimes people fall for each other despite knowing exactly what it could cost them."

Li Yan understood what she meant, perhaps more than he wanted to. He remembered the disgust that had appeared on his father’s and brothers’ faces when they discovered that he was a Ger. His designation had been enough to make them regard him as something defective, and the fact that he was a man who could bear children had only deepened their contempt.

Women were expected to possess the body capable of giving birth, while men were expected to father children. In their eyes, a man who possessed a Ger’s body had violated the order they believed the world should follow.

He had spent his entire life craving the affection and care that other people seemed to receive so naturally, yet he had gradually accepted that someone like him might never be allowed to have it.

He looked back toward the courtyard where the two young men were still sitting together and silently wished them well. Whatever difficulties waited ahead of them, he hoped they would be strong enough to protect each other and never allow the world’s judgment to separate them.

Li Yan pushed the unpleasant thoughts aside and continued down the corridor until he reached the third room. After knocking twice, he called through the door.

"Gu Jun? It is Li Yan. Can I come in?"

Gu Jun had been in the middle of changing his clothes when he heard the familiar voice, and he hurried toward the door with obvious enthusiasm. He opened it almost immediately, his face brightening when he saw who was standing outside.

"Yan Yan, you are here."

Li Yan was about to answer when his attention was caught by Gu Jun’s exposed upper body. He had seen Gu Jun countless times with his clothes on, but the difference was startling now that he could see his actual build.

How was he this big?

Gu Jun normally appeared much slimmer beneath his clothes, yet his uncovered upper body revealed a physique that was considerably broader and more muscular than Li Yan had expected. Despite being only a year older, their bodies looked as though they belonged to people of completely different ages.

Gu Jun noticed where Li Yan was looking and glanced down at himself before explaining, "My body is a bit manlier than most men my age. I did a lot of odd jobs when I was younger, and I also went through puberty early."

That explanation made sense, but Li Yan still could not stop staring. Gu Jun’s muscles were even more pronounced than Hu Bai’s, which left him wondering whether his own body would eventually develop in the same way once puberty arrived.

His curiosity eventually overcame his hesitation, and he looked up at Gu Jun with genuine interest.

"Can—can I touch it?"