Chapter 65

Leaving Father Gowon wide-eyed behind, the other person dashed outside.

The rest of Gowon’s dedicated team were waiting there, barely holding back their laughter as they gave the man a thumbs-up. He was an employee in Division Five’s merchandise department. Since he mainly worked from home designing merchandise, Gowon had never had occasion to meet him even though he was assigned to his team.

Naturally, all of this was going to be explained in captions, along with the sight of Father Gowon looking as though his soul had left his body in the span of a few seconds.

“N-No... What was that? Who was that person, seriously...?”

—Now, now. A priest must not try to uncover the identity of an anonymous confessor.

“Father, may I come in?”

A new voice followed. Gowon barely managed to compose his flustered expression before answering.

“Yes, come in....”

The second person entered with a more confident stride and sat down. For someone who had come to confess their sins, they seemed rather excited. Only then did Gowon remind himself that this was not a real confession, but an entertainment program.

The previous employee must have sung the song to create a funny scene too.

In that case, Gowon should now come up with witty responses of his own so they could get some good footage.

“Father, I am an artist under K-Dom.”

It was a woman’s clear voice. Since every artist at K-Dom was senior to Gowon, he straightened his posture. He resolved to answer diligently, with gratitude toward the senior artist who had come to help him.

“I’m dating someone.”

But he immediately froze solid, unable to say a word.

“...Pardon me, but are you a member of a girl group?”

“Oh? Do I sound like a man? I shouldn’t.”

“N-No. I was wondering whether you were an actress, an entertainer, or a singer.”

“Ah, I see. Then yes, I am a girl-group member!”

“....... ...I... see....”

Dating is illegal for idols. Especially for anyone with fewer than five years in the industry. That deserves the death penalty.

This was not Gowon’s own opinion. It was Baek Hanje’s voice echoing inside his head. Gowon had been thoroughly brainwashed by him long ago.

“Father, can love be a sin?”

“...Sometimes, depending on your profession....”

“Then should I break up with them? Because of my job?!”

“Well...!”

It would probably be better if she broke up with them... No, she should break up with them....

He clutched his neatly styled blond hair in both hands in anguish. After a long struggle, he finally managed to ask a question.

“Do you love that person very much...?”

“Are you supporting my love, Father?”

“That isn’t what I meant. It’s just that, given our profession—”

“Our profession? Father, are you perhaps an idol too...?”

“No! I misspoke. That isn’t what I meant. It’s just that your profession is not one where you can openly date without consequences. You are more likely to receive a negative reaction... So I wanted to ask whether you love them enough to endure all of that.”

“Ah, I see. Oh. You went straight to the heart of the matter... Ahem.”

The mysterious guest spoke in a slightly warmer voice.

“Yes, I love them very much. That person is always by my side, and whenever we are together, they make wonderful things happen, like gifts. I could almost say they are the entirety of my happiness.”

The words were beautiful enough to belong in a tender scene from a romance drama, but Gowon noticed something strange in them.

“When you say ‘always’... do you happen to see them often?”

“Oh, it’s an office romance.”

“.......”

Gowon grabbed his hair again. This time, his trembling gaze turned toward the camera. He looked as though he were wondering whether he should smash it right now and destroy the evidence for the sake of this unknown senior artist’s future.

Was love really that important? Important enough to risk everything? As far as he knew, every girl group K-Dom had ever debuted had achieved at least above-average success. Was it worth giving that up...?

Gowon tried to think of something that could hold as much value as everything he had accomplished as a singer.

Something he would choose even if it meant giving up those accomplishments.

.......

Gowon suddenly realized that he knew far too little to give advice on this matter.

A love worth abandoning everything one had accomplished.

Did something with that kind of value truly exist?

“I have something I would like to ask.”

“Oh, okay.”

“...What is love?”

“Huh?”

“How do you have to feel about someone, and how much do you have to like them, for it to be called love? I don’t know....”

“Uh... Hahaha. That voice isn’t part of the concept. You’re genuinely asking.”

The confessor was flustered by the sudden question.

But now that Gowon was facing the difficult question of love for the first time in his life, he failed to notice the subtle change in her voice.

The only love Gowon knew was what he had studied in order to portray the emotional arcs of music videos. Within singer Gowon’s fictional universe, love meant yearning for someone, being unable to stop thinking of them, and losing control of one’s face, heart, and fingertips.

But the love the other person described seemed stable, the kind that warmly embraced someone from within....

After hearing Gowon’s explanation, the confessor crossed her arms, tilted her head thoughtfully, and answered.

“Both.”

“Is it possible for both to coexist?”

“Of course. That’s why people do crazy things when they fall in love and flail around as though their souls have been stolen.”

“.......”

Gowon still did not know what that kind of love felt like.

“That’s why love is frightening and ecstatic.”

But if it was something she wanted badly enough to speak of publicly here... and something she wanted to attain even if it meant giving up what she had....

“You really do love that person very much.” 𝘧𝓇ℯℯ𝑤ℯ𝘣𝓃ℴ

“Yes!”

Perhaps supporting that feeling was one possible answer.

Even so, he could not easily bring himself to say, “If your feelings matter more than your duty as an idol, then there’s nothing you can do!”

The confessor watched Gowon agonize for a moment, then snapped her fingers.

“Oh, but now that I think about it, I can probably just keep promoting while dating, can’t I?”

“Excuse me?”

Was that possible? Were they planning to edit this part out? Just as he was wondering—

“The people I’m dating are our fans. The fans who make me nervous and excited as I wonder what they thought of me this time, but who also always support me from behind. Thank you for staying with me. I love you!”

“......?!”

“Father, will you bless this love?”

Gowon barely managed to close his hanging jaw.

...Right. Love for one’s fans... was love too.

He loved One and Only in a similar way.

“...I sincerely pray that it lasts forever, for a very, very long time.”

“Thank you!”

Having finished her confession, the woman sprang out of her seat just as cheerfully as she had entered.

The company’s youngest artist was already utterly worn out by his very first original-content shoot.

“Good to see you.”

Gowon recognized the next person the moment he entered.

“Is it really all right for me to hear the confession of a division head—no, a b-broth—um, fellow... brother...?”

“Ah, it’s fine. Right now, I just need to tell someone. Anyone.”

The other person let out a sigh steeped in profound anguish.

“I am the eldest of six brothers, with five younger brothers beneath me.”

“...I am well aware.”

“But those bastards never listen to a damn thing I say, never come home, and do nothing but wander around outside. Sometimes I feel like quitting my position as the eldest altogether.”

“Don’t you still see the youngest... brother fairly often?”

“He is the biggest problem. He has been going through puberty for twelve years.”

“.......”

The next confessor appeared with an energetic greeting.

“Hello! I’m here!”

This was another familiar voice.

Gowon was secretly glad to hear it. Jung Yusang, Newton’s youngest member, had become so cheerful that no one would ever imagine he had gone through something terrible.

“Yes. Hello. What would you like to confess...?”

“I turn twenty next year. What if the older members stop thinking I’m cute? I want to be the youngest forever. I want them to protect me every day and forgive me no matter what I do wrong!”

Perhaps it would be all right if he became slightly less cheerful.

Faced with a question he truly did not want to answer, Gowon struggled to come up with an appropriate response.

“Brother, this segment is for confessing what you have done wrong, not receiving advice about your problems.”

“Oh, so that’s what this segment is.”

Neither of them even noticed that they had forgotten the concept and openly called it a “segment.”

“Then let’s say my cuteness is the crime, and you can give me advice.”

“...Hmm....”

With that degree of shamelessness, he seemed ready to begin separating himself from the older members.

Still, this particular concern was not difficult to answer.

“I’m not sure that is what you truly want.”

“What do you mean?”

“You do not only want to act spoiled around them forever, do you? Don’t you also want to be someone they can rely on and occasionally help solve their problems?”

“Whoa, now that I think about it, I love that. How did you know?”

Because Gowon had felt something similar after being treated like a child for the first time in his life by someone....

He could also advise Yusang from an older brother’s perspective.

“Once you have been the younger one in someone’s eyes, you will always be their younger one. There is no need to worry.”

Gowon thought of the youngest child at home. Go Suhyeon, who had just turned ten. He still had an impossibly long way to go before anyone could even begin to say he was grown. But even if Suhyeon turned twenty, or grew much older than that, Gowon thought he would still look like a child to him.

Come to think of it, Suhyeon must have been badly frightened by the stalker incident, but Gowon had been too busy with promotions to give him proper attention.

The others must have been frightened too, but Suhyeon is especially young.

That unconscious train of thought was itself the very reason Yusang had nothing to worry about.

“Would you like me to tell you one line that will let you find out exactly how your older member feels?”

“Whoa, yes.”

“When he tries to do something for you, say in the most adult voice you can manage, ‘It’s okay. I’m all grown up now, so I’ll handle it myself. Thank you for everything you’ve done.’”

“What if he never takes care of me again after that?!”

“That won’t happen, so trust me.”

The person Yusang was most worried about was probably Nam Jeongho.

If it were him, he would likely become restless upon hearing that declaration and grow even more desperate to take care of Yusang.

On that note, Gowon should call Suhyeon after filming ended.

And as for Baek Hanje....

“.......”

He suddenly felt envious of Yusang.

Gowon could never say something like, “I’m all grown up now, so you don’t have to do that anymore,” to Baek Hanje.

Not only did he have no right to say such a thing, but... he and Baek Hanje were not tied together as members of the same group like Jung Yusang and Nam Jeongho. Aside from being a junior and senior artist, there was no word that could explain their relationship.

Besides, unlike Nam Jeongho, Baek Hanje was also the sort of person highly likely to turn away and say, “All right, good for you. Handle it yourself from now on!”

At some point, Gowon had stopped trying to move out of Baek Hanje’s house. He felt remarkably sly because of it.

A few days ago, the company had mentioned finding him new accommodations, but he had said nothing. And he wanted Baek Hanje never to learn that fact.

“Hello?”

“......!”

Gowon reacted so strongly because he had just heard the voice of the very person he had been thinking about.

A moment later, his heart began pounding wildly.

It felt as though the small room had filled with the blue fragrance of the bouquet.