Chapter 121: Mana Without a Path

The trip back to the Verdant Hollow took longer than expected. Gray moved slowly, keeping to the shadows of the pale stone ridges, his senses spread wide for any sign of danger.

When they finally slipped through the narrow entrance of the grotto, the familiar green light of the Spirit Moss Ferns washed over them.

Gray settled into the alcove where Cindy had eaten earlier, lowering her gently onto the moss.

’We’re back,’ he said.

Cindy stretched her tiny limbs, her frills fluttering with relief.

"Finally. I’ve had enough excitement for one day."

’You say that every day.’

"Because every day is exhausting with you."

Gray let out a low hum of amusement.

’Oh, is that so? Sorry for being exhausting.’

Cindy turned toward him, her small axolotl body already drifting toward a thick patch of Spirit Moss.

"I’m going to stabilize my mana. That mana spring increased my capacity and strengthened this body more than I expected. I need to settle it before it destabilizes."

’Good,’ Gray said, already settling against the stone. ’Then I’ll sleep for a while. Wake me if anything happens.’

Cindy glanced back at him.

"...Alright. Rest well, Gray."

Gray let his tentacles go slack, his bell relaxing against the cold stone floor. The green glow of the moss ferns washed over him, and the familiar warmth of the shelter’s regeneration seeped into his body.

Before long, his awareness faded into the quiet dark.

After a few hours later....

Gray woke to the soft pulse of the Spirit Moss Ferns and the faint, steady glow of Cindy’s silver light.

He blinked, his senses slowly returning. Then he noticed Cindy.

She was no longer the small, fragile axolotl he’d carried back. Her body had grown, just slightly, her frills longer and more defined.

"You’re awake," she said.

’You... changed,’ Gray said, looking at Cindy’s new form.

Cindy looked down at herself, flexing her small hands. The webbing between her fingers shimmered faintly with mana.

"The mana spring’s energy settled into me while I rested," she said. "It accelerated the repair of my Gift. I’m not back to full strength, but I’m closer than I was."

’How close?’

"Third Circle," she said, and there was quiet pride in her voice. "Maybe higher, once I finish stabilizing. It’s not Fifth, but it’s enough to cast real spells again."

Gray pulled himself upright, feeling fully recovered himself.

’Then we can start training.’

Cindy’s frills lifted.

"Eager, aren’t you?"

’You said you’d teach me. I’m holding you to it.’

Cindy drifted toward the center of the alcove, her small body moving with a grace that hadn’t been there before. She raised one hand, and a thin ribbon of silver light curled around her fingers.

"Then let’s begin with the most important lesson," she said. "How to shape mana without killing yourself."

Gray settled across from her, his tentacles spread wide.

’That sounds important.’

"It is. Most humans that develop mana abilities die young because they treat mana like a weapon instead of a tool. They force it, and it tears them apart from the inside." She paused, her silver eyes meeting his. "Your mana pool is enormous now. Larger than most human mages. But if you don’t learn to control it, it will destroy you."

Gray absorbed her words quietly.

’So what do I do first?’

"First, you learn to feel the mana inside your own body," Cindy said. "Close your eyes and focus inward."

Gray dimmed his senses and turned his awareness inward. At first, there was only the familiar pulse of his bell, the steady hum of his core. Then, slowly, he began to feel it. A vast, glowing ocean of mana resting inside him, calm on the surface but impossibly deep.

’I feel it,’ he said.

Cindy nodded, her frills swaying gently.

"Good. Now try to guide it. Don’t force it! let it flow naturally, like water finding its path downhill."

Gray focused inward. The ocean of mana inside him was vast and calm, and he reached for it carefully, trying to nudge it toward his tentacles.

But after the mana flowed, nothing happened.

He tried again, imagining the mana as a current, imagining it moving through his body the way water moved through the abyss. But the mana simply sat there, unmoving, as if it hadn’t heard him at all.

’...It’s not working.’

"That’s normal," Cindy said. "Try again but slowly this time. Feel the direction it wants to go, then follow it."

Gray tried again and again and again.

Each attempt was harder than the last. The mana didn’t flow and It didn’t bend. It just waited like a lake with no outlet. His tentacles twitched with frustration, and a faint ache began to build behind his bell.

’I... I can’t do it.’

Cindy’s voice was patient, but there was a note of surprise underneath.

"You can’t?"

’I can feel it and see it. But I can’t move it. It’s like... trying to push a boulder with a thought.’

Cindy drifted closer, her silver eyes studying him.

"...That’s strange. You absorbed so much mana, and your mana pool is enormous. You can sense currents like a trained mage. But you can’t even guide a single thread?"

’I’m telling you, it won’t move.’

Cindy’s frills lowered slowly, and a realization began to dawn on her face.

"Gray... I think I understand now."

’Understand what?’

"You’re a monster," she said carefully. "Your body evolved to survive. Your mana pool grew because you consumed something that was made of pure mana. But your body..." She paused. "It never learned how to channel mana."

’So what does that mean?’

"It means you have the tank of a mage, but not the pipes," Cindy said. "The mana is inside you, vast and powerful. But your body has no natural path to release it. You’re not a mage, Gray. You’re a creature that happens to contain magic."

Gray let Cindy’s words settle in his mind for a moment.

’...So I can’t learn magic?’

"Not the way I learned it," Cindy admitted. "Your body isn’t built for it. Human mages are born with mana channels. They refine them over years. Your body never had them. You’d be starting from nothing, and there’s no guarantee it would ever work."

The words settled over Gray like cold water.

He had absorbed a god of mana. He had a mana pool larger than most human mages and he couldn’t even move a single thread.

’...That’s frustrating.’

"I know," Cindy said softly. "I’m sorry."

’Don’t apologize,’ Gray said. ’It’s not your fault.’

He drifted back, his tentacles coiling loosely against the stone floor of the grotto. The green light of the Spirit Moss Ferns pulsed around him, and for a moment, the only sound was the gentle flow of the water.

’So what now?’ he asked.

Cindy hovered beside him, her small body close.

"There are other paths," she said. "Mana isn’t only used through channels. Some creatures use it instinctively, through their bodies, their blood, their cores. You already do that with your skills, don’t you? Those are mana-driven, even if you didn’t know it."

Gray lifted his bell slightly.

’So I can still use mana just not the way a mage does.’

"Exactly," Cindy said. "You don’t need to cast spells. You need to evolve. Your body will find its own way to use what’s inside you."

’And if it doesn’t?’

Cindy hesitated. Then, quietly.

"...Then you’ll still have me."

Gray looked at her.

’I didn’t bring you back just to be my crutch,’ he said. ’You need your own strength too.’

"I know," Cindy said. "But while we’re both still growing, we can lean on each other right?"

Gray was quiet for a moment. Then his tentacles relaxed, and his bell pulsed softly.

’...Alright,’ he said. ’Then I’ll stick to what I’m good at and you can handle the magic.’

Cindy’s frills rose with satisfaction.

"I like that."