Chapter 163 : Chapter 163

Chapter 163: Inner Thoughts

Water ‍​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​‌‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​​​‌‌​​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​‌​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​‌‌​​​​​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​​​​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​​‌​​‌​​‌​​​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​‌‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​​​​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​​​‌​​‌​​‌​​​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​​​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​​​‌‌​‌​​​​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​​​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​​‌‌​​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​‌​​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​​‌‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​​​‌​​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​​​​‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​‌​​​​‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​​​‌​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​​​‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌​​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌​‌​​​​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​‌​​​​​‌​‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​​‌​​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌‌​​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​‌​​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​​‌​​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌​‌​‌‌‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌​‌​​​‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌‌‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌‌​‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌​‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​​‌‌​​​​​​‌‌‌‌​‌‍rushed into my eyes and nose.

I ‍​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​​​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‍had let my guard down, thinking I would swim upward, and I spat out a curse.

I ‍​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​​​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‍had been plunged into water quite a few times, but never once had I felt my life threatened as much as I did now.

A ‍​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​​​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‍single question had aggravated my anxiety.

If ‍​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​​​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‍the one being spoken to was Sierra, that meant the owner of the voice was not Emperor Sierra.

Judging ‍​‌​‌​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​​​​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌​‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​​​‌‌​‌​​​​‌‌‌​​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌​‌​​​​‌​​​​​​‌‌‌​​‌‌​‌‌‌​‌​​​‌‌‌​​‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌‌​‌‌​​‌​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌‌‌​​‌​​‌​​​​​​‌‌​​‌‌​​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​‌​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​‌‌​​​‌‌​‌​​‌​‌‌​​​​‌​‌‌‌​​‌​​​‌​‌‌‌​‍by the situation, it seemed the promise had not been kept. Then what did the power moving the river want from the descendants of the Imperial Family that had failed to keep that promise?

At the very least, it would not be death.

After all, it had already let several opportunities to lead me to death slip by.

Though it did not seem as if it had no intention of screwing with me either.

As I could not even open my eyes because of the rough current, the excessively clear voice began shoving information into my head again.

[The orcs also staked their lives on this matter. If they do not obtain what was promised to them, the contract will fall apart. A cycle that has begun once does not end.]

A promise with the orcs, a contract.

All of it was information even the leader himself had not remembered properly, but I had no leisure to calmly organize it in my head.

[The remaining power will move to fulfill the contract no matter what, and if it slips out of control, what form that method will take......]

Because the voice grew louder and clearer, and now it was tormenting me as if someone were speaking through a loudspeaker right next to my ear.

So what the hell was it that the orcs wanted?

I need to know that before I can do anything.

It was the moment I thought that while frowning at the feeling of my skull ringing.

[The place where the contract will be fulfilled is right here. What they want will be born here. That is why you must guard this place so the contract is fulfilled properly.]

At last, someone who only had a loud voice, no, someone who was nothing but a voice, offered a clue about the content of the promise I had been most curious about.

The orcs, and the place where those bastards were born.

With just these two things, I could infer where the “here” the owner of the voice spoke of was referring to.

I wanted to listen a little longer, but first, I had to get out of the water.

I did not have enough breath to remain underwater like this.

I knew I had to go up, but a small temptation caught at my ankle.

The temptation that if I endured the pain just a little longer, I might learn more.

Would it not be all right to go down just a little more?

In the end, I decided to relax my body, and just as I was about to entrust myself to the water pulling me along, it happened.

A powerful force pulling the scruff of my neck lifted my body.

“Guhk!!!”

Realizing that my lungs had been losing their function to the point that the sudden oxygen filling them felt unfamiliar and hard to bear, I leaned forward to cough out my breath.

Once my breathing had returned somewhat, I raised my head to confirm the owner of the hand was still roughly gripping the scruff of my neck.

“Kkwek......”

A timid cry and dim eyes.

As far as I knew, there was only one orc who had not a single threatening quality to him like this.

***

As I filled my insufficient lungs, various assumptions repeatedly rose and sank inside my head.

One thing was certain.

Sierra’s journey as written in the Red Book was, as expected, not something trustworthy.

This cunning bastard whom people revered as a god seemed to have had no hesitation about borrowing the power of monsters to knead the world however he pleased.

The problem was that it looked as if I had been saddled with cleaning up the aftermath of the contract he had failed to properly fulfill.

Who decided that?

It was obvious all over again, but he truly was a bastard who could not properly play the role of a god.

I was not idle enough to clean up after a bastard like that.

Damn it. Once I destroy the holy object, I have to run right away.

I looked at the bastard who was the greatest obstacle to that goal.

The half-wit merely blinked his eyes with that stupid face of his, as if he knew nothing at all.

Even though there was no need to keep acting now.

Had such meticulous acting moved the leader’s heart or something?

The leader cherished the half-wit.

Probably with a heart larger and deeper than I had expected.

But that was not important.

What mattered was not forgetting the objective.

The purpose of all this damn suffering was one thing.

For Ratel to absorb Sierra’s remaining power.

At any rate, if that happened, this damned contract and everything else would be over.

There would be no need for me to step in.

I glared at the half-wit as he hovered around me, as if watching my reaction.

“Kkwek. Why did you pull me back out of the river after shoving me in to kill me?”

“K-kwek......”

The bastard did not stop pretending he knew nothing.

“Kkwek. I already know you ate the leader’s neck. Kkwek. That one-armed bastard isn’t here either, so say something.”

Your lies have already been exposed for a long time.

The half-wit, who had been sneaking sidelong glances at my certain gaze, twitched his fingers.

I watched the bastard with patience.

“K-kwek......”

At last, the half-wit’s mouth opened and closed several times.

He seemed to be hesitating, or perhaps doing something he was not used to.

As his clumsy effort continued, I watched what the bastard was doing with a sunken mood.

“K-kwek. Th-then......”

At last, the bastard’s mouth opened.

“Kkwek. If y-you d-die, kkwek, the h-human will k-kill the leader.”

The awkward way he spoke was itself proof that the bastard had torn into the leader’s neck, but I was not happy in the slightest.

Because I had no thoughts at all while chewing over the bastard’s clumsy answer, which was far too different from what I had expected.

What is he talking about?

I could not understand what the bastard was saying.

No, it would be more accurate to say that for a moment, I refused to understand.

“Kkwek. D-don’t kill. Kkwek. D-don’t k-kill the leader.”

But perhaps I did not want to admit that the awkwardly continuing words were only a desperate plea that had not existed in my expectations.

Today was the day I was screwed over by the half-wit several times.

No, that was not right. This time too, the bastard was not the only one screwing me over.

My own complacent thoughts and prejudice had screwed me over.

At the same time, a faint sense of unfairness also raised its head.

If you two are that fond of each other, just express it, you crazy bastards.

***

They say prejudice makes it impossible for people to love.

It was something my homeroom teacher, who rarely went off topic during class in high school, had said.

I did not remember how the conversation had drifted that way.

Whether some character in the book during class had stirred his nostalgia, or whether the cold wind blowing through the crack in the window had made him look back on his life as he faced retirement the next year, or whatever else.

I did remember, however, that he had moistened his bulging eyes as he said that was how his first love had ended.

There was a reason something this silly, of all the few memories I had from high school, had remained.

The reason this silly scene remained in my head among my few high school memories was that I thought he was ridiculous.

It was not because he had suddenly remembered his first love in the middle of class and reddened his eyes, nor because he had suddenly clenched his fist and pressed his head against the blackboard while shaking his shoulders to hide the fact that his eyes had welled up with tears.

It was because the very man advising us not to hold prejudice was the person who had given me the bruise near my eye just the day before, and the reason was merely that he was the kind of human who had scolded me while I was cleaning, saying the future of bastards like me who walked around with eyes like that was obvious.

Thinking back on it now, quietly sweeping there would have been the way to prove that his words were wrong.

But even back then, I was the kind of human who could not control my mouth or my temper and earned myself more beatings.

-Then don’t wait until next year. Retire right now. You’d make more money if you went outside, spread out a mat, and read people’s faces.

-......What? What did you just say, you bastard? You're dog-like......

-I think that’d be better for the students too.

That day, he personally showed me that my future held a beating.

If not for the math teacher who happened to be passing by, I probably would have been beaten until something broke or until I passed out.

That was fortunate.

If I had fainted, things would have become more complicated.

Ignoring the throbbing pain in my back, I watched the homeroom teacher give his passionate speech.

Still unable to compose his reddened eyes, he was finishing up his not particularly useful life lesson.

-So, you bastards, don’t judge people by their impressions. Even if you think you already know someone, look back once more. Hm? That’s what you have to do. Got it?

He nodded in satisfaction as he heard the students’ answers, but when his eyes met mine, his eyes widened, and he soon turned his gaze away.

I did not know whether he had realized his own contradiction, or whether there had been no particular reason.

As I watched the back of his head while he began class again, I vaguely seemed to realize something.

That I would probably become a human not so different from that man once I grew older too.

A human who could not keep even one thing he said with his own mouth, and who simply acted however the emotions of the moment dictated.

Well, about ten years later, I had really become exactly the kind of adult I had expected.

And now, I felt that perhaps he might still have been a better human than me.

At least, considering that his teaching still remained deep in my head even now, he had fulfilled his professional calling of teaching students to some extent.

......To be a little more honest, there was one more emotion slowly filling up from somewhere deeper inside my heart.

Shame.

It was the shame that came from the realization that I had been overestimating myself without even knowing it.

The arrogance that because I had read the original work, I knew everything about this world, had led to the illusion that I might be some impressive person.

Even though the fact that I was merely a worthless human had not changed.

I glared at the half-wit’s tense face and the dim eyes watching my reaction.

A large part of me wished there were some other purpose meant to deceive me instead.

But there was only one thing I could read in the bastard’s eyes.

The foolishly simple wish that the leader would not die.

“Kkwek. It doesn’t matter whether I live or die. Kkwek. The leader has to die anyway.”

“K-kwek! No! Kkwek. If I h-have you, that scary h-human won’t kill him. Kkwek. S-so you have to come with me and the leader.”

And a plan with no countermeasures at all.

At the plan so sloppy that an empty laugh almost burst out of me, the tension somehow drained away along with my strength.

Because in that hopeless sight, I could not find even a shadow of the meticulous, persistent leader from the original work.

Far from meticulous, this was no different from a thoughtless child if it were a human.

“Kkwek. Are you saying you’ve been watching me so persistently all this time just to look for a chance to kidnap me?”

“Kkwek. It w-wasn’t kidnapping. Kkwek. At first.”

What the hell does that mean?

Does he mean he had not planned to kidnap me from the beginning?

......Surely he did not mean he had intended to just kill me at first.

When I narrowed my eyes, the half-wit rolled his eyes.

“Kkwek. I th-thought you were running from the humans too. Kkwek. So I thought if you and the leader ran away together, it would work.”

That was not completely wrong.

It was not as if I had never thought of running away from Ratel.

Still, there was no reason for the bastard to help me with that.

“Kkwek. Why were you trying to run away with me too?”

When I asked the question that came to mind as it was, the half-wit’s face relaxed a little.

“Kkwek. B-because you’re similar to a human.”

This was not wrong either.

At any rate, I was a creature that had gone from human to orc.

While I was admiring the bastard’s reasoning, which was strangely sharp yet completely wrong in direction, the half-wit continued speaking.

“Kkwek. Th-the leader likes humans, even if he looks like that. Kkwek. So I th-thought he’d like it if we went with you.”

“......”

Nowhere in the bastard’s voice, as he dreamed of an impossible future, was there any ambition to tear into the leader’s neck and take his place.

I was not used to it, but I knew this kind of baseless, utterly illogical emotion.

Like a child on the verge of being scolded by an adult, the bastard was pleading with me.

Damn it. Fuck.

Belatedly, the strange gaze of the protagonist bastard who had been looking at me came to mind.

I had a feeling that he might have noticed something from my strange answer.

Though I did wonder what meaning there was in nitpicking something like that now.