Volume 3 Chapter 44: The other end of the line

Izzy sits at the bar. Her life up till the fateful day she arrived at the ranch motel was normal, boring, but normal. She looks at the eldritch abomination that is standing in front of her. At least some part of it is standing in front of her. She looks it over. Today it's wearing a suit that is purple. Its ears are poking out of its inky black hair. They are covered in a very thin layer of fur. Its eyes are those of a cat with brilliant purple corneas. It blinks its nictitating membrane at Izzy.

"What do you think you're doing, Izzy?" the cat says in an even voice. "You don't want to see what you're really looking at, do you?" a hint of madness bled through its carefully created facade.

"Uh, no," Izzy says in defense. "Jacob isn't back yet. What should I do now?"

The cat taps his long, sharp claws on the wooden bar. "Eat, drink, visit the other bathroom? It's been a while," he suggests.

Izzy thinks about the other bathroom and wonders if a trip there would cure her itch. If Cane were around, that would work, but she knows he is off doing something. Possibly saving the world? She isn't sure. But what she really wants is the minotaur and the impressive size of his package. She wonders if it is The echoes of the prophecy rolling in her head or just her overactive sex drive.

"So I have a problem," Izzy whispers as she leans forward.

"Oh," the cat says, his long tail swishing back and forth.

"I want to fit larger things," she says in hushed tones.

"That's disgustingly human," the cat responds too loudly and grins, a sense of pride welling up in him, "but I am not interested."

"Not with you," Izzy says and blushes; she waves his assertions away.

"Well, who did you have in mind? Surely you mean Grup and not the Minotaur?" the Cat says, adjusting his bow tie.

"Shh, keep it down. So if I hypothetically wanted to fit, say, the minotaur inside. Is there like magic? Or a potion? Someone has to have invented something to solve this problem… right?" Izzy asks like she is asking for illegal drugs. She blushes. 'At least with illicit drugs, people will think you're edgy...' she thinks to herself. Her guts feel wrong thinking about fitting the monstrous-sized appendage inside her.

"Maybe, but magic comes with a price. Maybe you need to practice." The cat smirks like a cat wall clock but then frowns, "But I am afraid we are all out of time. Science may be your only hope, Izzy."

"Science? I am going to be experimented on?" Izzy says, pulling herself back from the Cat.

"I'm not sure you have a choice. Go see the doctor; he might be able to help," the Cat says with a wave of dismissal. The bar is growing busier, and a line is forming behind her. "I know this is tough, Izzy, but we are nearing the end; just a little longer."

Izzy stands up and heads to reception, takes a sharp right turn and, after a shorter wait, the elevator doors close. She is riding downstairs to medical. "Why are you doing this?" she asks herself out loud. The elevator stops.

"What the hell?" Izzy says to the elevator and anyone listening.

"I have decided that I no longer want to be an elevator," the speaker of the elevator sqawks.

"Can you make that decision after we arrive at medical?" Izzy shouts at the elevator.

"But why am I doing this?" the elevator speaker squawks.

"BECAUSE YOU'RE AN ELEVATOR!" Izzy shouts, fear flooding her body. Elevators have always freaked her out, and now the walls seem to be rushing toward her, ready to crush her.

After what feels like an eternity to Izzy, the elevator begins moving again. "Thank you, elevator?" she asks the metal box.

The elevator dings and the doors open, letting Izzy out into the waiting room of medical.

The waiting room is empty. Nurse Happy is sitting behind the desk; the thick glass is protecting her from Izzy. Izzy looks at nurse Happy and changes her mind. No, that glass is there to protect me from her. Izzy looks her over; her paper nurse's hat is perfect as usual. The disgruntled look on her face is also usual. She sits up straight and watches as Izzy approaches.

"I think the elevator might be going rogue," Izzy says to Nurse Happy.

"That's unfortunate; I will have a conversation with its mother," Nurse Happy says with professional avoidance. She adds, "Now, down to business."

"I need to see the doctor," Izzy says and thinks, 'the wonderful doctor of Oz.'

Nurse Happy looks like it has been more than a few hours since she has smoked a cigarette.

"First, you have to tell me why. So what's the nature of your visit this time?" Nurse Happy questions. already tapping a few keys on the screen. "We have no record of an appointment today."

"I need to talk to him about—" Izzy whispers the end of the sentence.

"You're going to need to speak up if you want me to hear you," Nurse Happy says.

"I need to talk to him about accommodation," Izzy says with slightly more confidence.

Nurse Happy with total professionalism, responds. "I don't think that's a service we provide here; this area is for medical-related problems only."

"I mean accommodating large objects," Izzy whispers.

Nurse Happy looks blankly at Izzy. "You want to fit large objects where, exactly?"

"Can you ask the doctor if he has a minute?" Izzy asks, her cheeks red with embarrassment, the absurdity of her request obvious to her now.

Meanwhile,

The doctor is sitting at his desk reading issue #42 of the extraordinary life and times of the princess Lavander—the curse of the seductive watermelon.

His day is ordinary: help some humans and maybe an alien and read as many comics as he can in between. A note flashes up on the screen.

"Patient would like to talk to you about vaginal expansion," the note reads. The doctor falls out of his chair. He looks around, then back to the screen. To the graphic sight of Princess Lavander's bulging abdomen.

The doctor responds, "What are you talking about?"

"I know you're not busy; I am sending her in," Nurse Happy replies.

The Doctor quickly moves the mouse to the x button on his comic viewer but changes his mind and minimizes it. After a few seconds for his body to settle down into its doctor form, he types, "Fine, I am ready," and stands up.

"The doctor will see you in exam room 4," Nurse Happy says with a frown on her face. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Izzy shakes her head no but enters the exam room.

The blue doctor looks at Izzy with a nervous look on his face. "You want a vaginal expansion?"

"This is embarrassing enough without everyone looking at me like I have three heads. I want to be able to fit the minotaur. Ok, I want him inside me. Ok." Izzy snaps, tired of being treated like she is gross or wrong for wanting this. If she was a climber of Mount Everest, would people be treating her like this?

"Well, there are options. You could go through a rigorous training program to loosen things up," the blue doctor says with conviction. His alien mind keeps imagining Izzy's belly full of eggs.

"And if there isn't time," Izzy says, sitting on the exam table, her feet kicking in the air.

"Well, there is always the break it and I will fix it method, but I don't recommend it," the doctor laughs and watches as Izzy cringes.

"There has to be something in the middle; tell me there is something in the middle," Izzy says, confidence turning into a whisper.

"One option is to visit the tentacle monsters; their toxin will do the trick, but you understand the side effects." The doctor offers. He needs to stop reading erotic comics during the day, but seeing as how he works 19 hours of a human's standard 24 hours and naps the rest, what free time is he supposed to use?

Izzy contemplates the tentacles wrapped around her legs, pulling them open. She thinks about being invaded by their ovipositor. The fullness and hormonal rush of being filled with eggs....

Izzy feels herself tense and her heart race. But there is the dark side of it, the side where you get saddled with the voice in your head that is weaker now, sure, but once the toxin is back, it will grow strong again.

"I i cant do it" Izzy whispers.

The doctor turns green with disgust. "There is one more way, but it involves the fake doctor."

"What can he do for me?" Izzy asks.

"The physiology of the blobby race means that their bodies have the ability to allow materials to be stretchy," the doctor says, disgusted. "We don't understand how the blobby race won't let us examine them in any detail. But if he is willing, he should be able to give you a temporary stretchiness."

Izzy kicks her feet and stands up from the exam table. "Thanks, Doc, for taking me seriously." She hugs his blue body; he feels squishy. She lets go.