The Primordial Record

Chapter 1681: To Seek Your Name

Rowan watched this mage discover he was on the palm of his hand. He made this process faster by nudging Kacius’s mind in the right direction and temporarily boosting his perception.

Despite reducing himself to the third-dimensional level, Rowan’s strength and size were still impossibly immense, and although he would have loved for Kacius to discover the mysteries about where he was slowly, Rowan’s control over time was much diminished as a third-dimensional being.

On his palm were countless fragments of laws that were benign but which could affect Kacius Black over the long term. For instance, the time dilation being experienced by Kacius on his palm was a part of Rowan’s innate defensive forcefield.

Time did not act as it should on Rowan’s palm, and if he were receiving an attack, it would either slow down or stop, unless the attack carried both incredible powers and a higher control over the laws of creation.

Generally, even without defending himself, it would be hard for him to be hurt by Old Ones who could not penetrate past his most minor defenses.

It was these defenses that made Kacius experience a thousand years go by as he postrated on his palm instead of the fraction of a second that it truly was. This was still with Rowan suppressing his defenses to the minimum; otherwise, Kacius could have lived his entire life on his palm, and maybe in real time, only a few minutes had gone by.

Kacius may be like a supreme immortal in front of other mortals, even God Emperors who had reached the fourth-dimensional level would see Kacius as a supreme figure, but to Rowan, Kacius was a mortal, and to see him stumbling around, yet still filled with the excitement of discovery, was humbling.

He watched the mage discover his hand, and Rowan allowed the perception of Kacius to keep expanding far past the limits that any immortal should have so that he could see his eyes.

Rowan could see the myriad of emotions playing on the face of Kacius as realization turned to fear, horror, admiration, and then acceptance. He could have easily looked into the mind of Kacius and read his emotions and memories easily, as if he were reading a book, but Rowan let the mage keep his secret.

He brought Kacius here to remind him of what it meant to be small and mortal. Kacius might believe he was immortal, after all, the lifespan of a higher-dimensional immortal was measured in Major Eras, it was inevitable that one day it was going to end, but for Rowan, his lifespan could as well regard a Major Era like a single year, inside a library of endless years.

Seeing the mage was a shock to his system, and Rowan thanked the man by rebuilding his foundation, thereby giving him the chance to fight for the life that he craved in this glorious Era. He was about to return the mage to Reality when Kacius spoke,

“I do not know your name, or the reason you have taken me from the hands of death. I am a mage, and we worship nothing but the pursuit of knowledge. If you will tell me your name, I shall pursue the understanding of your light for the rest of my life.”

Rowan blinked, a bit amused. He had half expected the mage to tremble and beg, or find sneaky ways to discover the reason he was resurrected; however, Kacius did something different: he pledged himself to Rowan’s service, and he did it in a manner that was not overbearing or overly supplicating.

He had introduced himself as a mage, and he had promised that for the rest of his life, he would pursue the mysteries of Rowan. Where other mages pursue the mysteries behind life, time, fire, death… Kacius would pursue the mystery of Rowan.

Rowan had never been interested in the world knowing who he was. With all the Primordials knowing of his existence, there was no reason to hide who he was from Reality; it could even be advantageous in a certain light. Still, he had seen no reason for his story to be known or his name to be acknowledged.

He had been loved and worshipped by his children for many years, and for Rowan, that was more than enough; he did not think he deserved more than he had been given after all this time.

Rowan did not crave worship or attention, and it would be enough if, in the end, no one knew of his name. Rowan was willing to die alone, unwitnessed. However, looking into the eyes of Kacius, he knew that letting him go without a word would haunt the mind of this mage forever, and so Rowan spoke to him.

Spending a moment in contemplation, ten thousand years had gone by on his palm, and Kacius had been waiting, his feet on pins and needles. There was regret flowing in his veins because he believed that he had overstepped his boundaries.

If he were standing before a Primordial entity, what would the acknowledgement of a minor immortal like him mean to such a power? It would have been better if he had been quiet and waited for whatever judgment that was to come to him.

But then, Kacius could not help but remember the memory of the golden eyes that opened above him. Even now, he refused to look up, not because the eyes possessed a crushing power that could instantly kill him, but because he could sense a profound wisdom and sadness in those eyes.

Kacius had seen the eyes and had not felt fear, only wonder and an intense ache in his heart; it was as if he were recollecting the warmth of his first hug or the pure laughter of his sister.

Those eyes were far above him, yet they felt incredibly near, and it was what gave Kacius the courage to speak his mind, because he believed that whoever was above him, with eyes that resembled a river of stars, was benevolent, and to pursue the knowledge of such a being was a privilege. Still, perhaps he had asked for too much.

What should he do? Could he beg for forgiveness or perhaps resign himself to whatever Fate was to be meted to him? It was difficult for him to make a decision when he had no framework to judge the appropriate responses to be given to a power greater than anything in existence.

Then Kacius heard his voice, and all of his fears became meaningless.

“I would tell you my name, but it would shatter your soul and ruin your foundation. Do not fear me, Kacius Black, for your presence has aided me in my comprehension of the path. You can leave this place with the boons I have given you and have no fear that I crave anything more from you.”

Kacius gasped in astonishment, and even though he knew he should be thanking this higher being for their grace, he knew that he could not live with himself if he went away without fighting for this opportunity.

He had already died once and no longer feared the darkness, for there was nothing to fear; he had no memory of what it was like to be without being, and now that he was alive, he wanted to seize every opportunity to make his life one that was worth living.

What could be more worthy than discovering the mysteries behind those eyes?

Knowing that perhaps he was making the greatest mistake in his life, Kacius swallowed, his heart nearly beating out of his chest, as he spoke some of the most daring words he had ever said in his life,

“If you will refuse me the privilege of pursuing the knowledge of your name, then I plead with you to let me forget this moment. If I am to return to reality, let me be unburdened by the remembrance of your gaze. For if I remember, I shall spend the rest of my days either cursing or worshiping you—and both would ruin me, for I have left the pursuit of the truth and fallen into a fantasy I cannot pull myself from.”

Kacius said all this in a single breath, before gasping and falling to his knees. As far as he knew, he had just threatened a being with the power of a Primordial, if not a Primordial itself.

Still, Kacius did not regret his words. How else could he have proved his devotion to the pursuit of this knowledge if he were not willing to die for it? He had faced danger for many lesser causes, and for the first time in his life, he believed he was choosing something that was greater than himself, and if in the pursuit of that knowledge, he stumbled and fell on the first steps, he would still choose this path again.

A sigh came from above him that made Kacius’s soul shudder,

“The knowledge of me comes with a burden that no one can bear. If you are determined to find the traces of my path, then go to the Origin Land, where you can retrace my steps. But if you do, know that you will no longer be a mage.”

Kacius looked up, wishing to thank this being, but then he found himself inside his room, his sister kneeling by his side, and with his return, Lila’s eyes flew open in astonishment.

She wanted to scream in surprise, but must have seen something in his eyes because her mouth snapped shut with an audible crack.

Kacius stood up, went to the window, and looked into the Reality. He remained in that position for a long time.

Drifting out of his body were glowing spots of light like fireflies, as his foundation as a mage was being crushed to pieces.

He welcomed the pain and the confusion as a new path arose before him.