Chapter 438: Miss, Are You Alive?

Hong Ying did not even have eyes, yet she had written the character for "despicable" on Li Banfeng's head with such accuracy.

Out of respect for Hong Ying, Li Banfeng did not even wipe it off. In a soft, tender tone, he asked, "Ying, I wanted to ask you about regenerating flesh."

Hong Ying laughed. "Got this body of mine on your mind? Do you like my peach or my conscience?[1] That vicious wife of yours can't regenerate a body like this, can she? Getting anxious about that now?"

Li Banfeng answered honestly, "I am indeed rather anxious about this."

"Sure, then. I'll teach you. Call me 'Wifey,' and I'll teach you."

"Easy enough!" Li Banfeng exclaimed. He worked himself up for a long while and strained with all his might to squeeze out, "Ying."

"I told you to call me 'Wifey'!"

"Then, um... Darling Ying."

"I told you to call me 'Wifey!'"

The Gramophone said from the main room, "Darling husband, just call her 'Wifey.' I won't get angry."

Li Banfeng took a deep breath and stared at Hong Ying for a long while, but in the end, he did not say it. He simply could not say it. Anything else was negotiable, but to him, he had only one wife.

Hong Ying gnashed her teeth in frustration. "Fine! I won't make things difficult for you anymore. I can't really explain how to regenerate flesh, either. Go ask the old man!"

Li Banfeng ran to the third room and said with a cheerful smile, "Sir, regarding regenerating flesh—"

The Pocket Dwelling let out a cold laugh. "You come empty-handed, yet you expect to learn my craft? Have you no shame?"

Li Banfeng thumped his chest and raised his head. "I'll make it up to you afterward. I've never asked anyone to do me a favor for nothing in return. Sir, just tell me what you want."

"Get me two lengths of railway track."

Li Banfeng lowered his head again. "Sir, you're making things difficult on purpose. It's not like I can just get railway tracks whenever I want."

"Put it on the tab. You can't learn the method of regenerating flesh. There's a barrier because of your Daoist path. Bring Crimson Lotus here. I'll have her think of a way."

So Crimson Lotus isn't blocked by her Daoist path?

Li Banfeng ran to the ninth room and scooped Crimson Lotus into his arms. "Crimson Lotus, I've neglected you lately."

Dewdrops beaded all over Crimson Lotus, and she sprayed Li Banfeng's face with them.

To show his sincerity, Li Banfeng did not wipe them off. He let the dewdrops dry naturally and carried Crimson Lotus to the third room.

The Pocket Dwelling said to Crimson Lotus, "I'll tell you the principles behind the method. See if you can come up with a pill recipe."

Li Banfeng did not know what method the Pocket Dwelling and the Crimson Lotus used to communicate, but after over ten minutes, Crimson Lotus produced two lotus seeds.

The first lotus seed burst open, and Li Banfeng obtained a Profound Essence Pill. Crimson Lotus had made it using Guo Jinshi's corpse.

This thing again.

To say it was a bad item would be a lie. After all, it really was a priceless treasure. Despite that, Li Banfeng had no use for it yet.

Li Banfeng thought for a moment, then he asked, "Is this for Big Bro Qiu?"

Crimson Lotus seemed to say something, but Li Banfeng could not make out what she said.

The Pocket Dwelling translated, "This is for you. Qiu Luoye can't use it. She wants you to look at the other lotus seed."

Li Banfeng handed the Profound Essence Pill to the Gramophone for safekeeping and peeled open the other lotus seed.

The lotus seed burst open, revealing what appeared to be a pill recipe to Li Banfeng. However, it was really just a list of 132 medicinal ingredients, a kilogram of each.

"Are we opening a medicine shop?" Li Banfeng questioned, barely holding back his frustration. Crimson Lotus clearly doesn't want to reveal the pill recipe to me.

Hearing that, Crimson Lotus closed her petals. She seemed to be sulking at Li Banfeng. Still, Li Banfeng needed a favor from her, so he could not lose his temper at her.

He returned to the Gramophone and continued asking about the Three Trials.

"Darling Wifey, the first trial is Soul Separation, the second is Rebirth. What's the third?"

"The third trial is Guarding the Territory. After Rebirth, he has to rely on his territory to regain his standing. The larger the territory and the more familiar he is with it, the faster he can regain his standing. Qiu Luoye has to use Kinless Township to regain his standing before he can stabilize his cultivation and then stabilize his soul. If he's unfamiliar with even a tiny part of Kinless Township, he will fail this trial. Does he know Kinless Township well?"

Li Banfeng fell silent once more.

Qiu Luoye had never been to Kinless Township, except for that one time he went there to kill Qiao Shaofen. He did not like the vibe there.

Additionally, Kinless Township was not a large territory. With only just over three thousand plots, it was far smaller than Qiu Luoye's original territory.

Li Banfeng grew troubled. "Darling Wifey, these three trials are way too difficult!"

The Gramophone let out a soft sigh. "That's why I said there's less than a ten-percent chance of Qiu Luoye succeeding. Husband dear, the stakes are too high, and the odds are too low. Think of another way."

There's no better way. Nor is there time to think of one.

The Inner Provinces could make its move at any moment. Qiu Luoye's life was hanging by a thread, and it could be snuffed out in an instant.

Li Banfeng left the Pocket Dwelling and found Qiu Luoye in a drunken haze, just about to head home for a nap.

As he approached, Li Banfeng said, "Big Bro Qiu, I've thought of an idea. I can't say whether it'll work, but if you trust me, let's take a gamble. Here's what we'll do..."

Li Banfeng explained the process of passing the Three Trials to Qiu Luoye. He knew the logic behind it was difficult to understand, so he explained every detail as simply as possible.

After explaining, Li Banfeng asked, "Big Bro, is there anything you still don't understand?"

Qiu Luoye rubbed his nose. "It's just passing three trials, right? But... uh... what were they again?"

Li Banfeng blinked. "Big Bro, how much have you had to drink?"

Qiu Luoye waved his hand, dismissing the question. "It doesn't matter what those trials are. In any case, I'll do whatever you say."

"If we're going to do this, we have to dig up your deed. It's a matter of life and death, so you have to make the decision yourself."

Qiu Luoye was not afraid of that. "Then dig it up! I'm going to die either way. I trust you."

Now that he had made his decision, they began making preparations.

"Big Bro Qiu, go take a walk around Kinless Township first and familiarise yourself with the territory. The more familiar you are with it, the better."

"Old Qi, give me two days. I'll definitely become familiar with Kinless Township."

"You still need to take two days?"

"Two days isn't long. I hardly ever went there before."

They could not rush this. All they could do was hope that those in the Inner Provinces did not make their move during these two days, giving them at least some hope that Qiu Luoye might pass the third trial.

Li Banfeng first went to find Ma Wu and gave him the ingredients list that Crimson Lotus had given him. "Help me buy some medicinal herbs."

Ma Wu was taken aback. "This much? Are you planning to open a medicinal trading house?"

"I indeed am."

Li Banfeng returned home and said to the Pocket Dwelling, "I'm going to Properfolk Village."

"What are you going there for?"

"To learn the Soul Separation Method."

The Pocket Dwelling was puzzled. Is there someone in Properfolk Village who knows the Soul Separation Method?

Nevertheless, he did not ask further.

Li Banfeng pictured Properfolk Village in his mind, opened the door, and, as expected, arrived there.

After leaving the Pocket Dwelling, Li Banfeng did not enter the village. Instead, he headed deeper into the New Land there, walking at an unhurried pace. After traveling over 35 kilometers, a city appeared up ahead amid the dense fog.

After entering through the city gates, a man came over and barked at Li Banfeng, "Where are you from? Did you pay the gate fee?"

"There's still a gate fee?" Li Banfeng let out a cold laugh. "Who are you trying to fool? Do you take me for an outsider?"

The man was taken aback. "You're not an outsider?"

"I'm Tang Changfa, the owner of the Changsan Literary House."

When Li Banfeng last left Yuren City, Sun Tiecheng had given him a business, the Changsan Literary House in the city, and entrusted Tang Changfa with managing it for the time being.

The man looked Li Banfeng up and down. "Nonsense. I know Tang Changfa. He doesn't look anything like you."

Li Banfeng frowned. "I just replaced my flesh."

"Replaced what flesh?" the man uttered. Those words made him feel deeply uncomfortable.

"Do you really not know, or are you pretending to be clueless? Do I really have to spell it out?"

"Who has time to listen to your nonsense?!" the man snapped. He turned and walked away.

The inhabitants of Yuren City were the masters of knowing they were dead yet firmly believing themselves to be alive. Every single person there believed, without the slightest doubt in their mind, that they were most certainly still alive.

This was caused by a Folly ability. According to Sun Tiecheng, they had accomplished it by using Words Chiseled in Stone. By successfully fooling themselves, the lie became reality.

However, Qiu Luoye was not a Folly Cultivator. How could he make himself believe his own lie? How could he convince himself that he was alive even though he was dead?

The first trial was simply too difficult. Qiu Luoye could not possibly complete it on his own. Li Banfeng had to help him, but as for how he could do that, he needed to do some serious research.

Trying to study the method on his own would be useless. He needed to conduct some field research. Qiu Luoye needed time to familiarize himself with his territory, so this was the perfect opportunity for Li Banfeng to go to Yuren City and learn the method from its inhabitants. As for how much Li Banfeng could learn and how much of it he could put to use would depend on his ability, as well as Qiu Luoye's luck.

It was dangerous to wander around Yuren City aimlessly was dangerous, so Li Banfeng had to find his own domain, the Changsan Literary House, as quickly as possible. However, the problem was that Li Banfeng had never been there, and Sun Tiecheng had not given him proper instructions on how to find the place, only its general direction.

Li Banfeng did not ask for directions. Asking for directions in Yuren City was equivalent to delivering himself to someone's doorstep as a meal. Li Banfeng fumbled his way through the streets on his own.

A fortune-teller came up to him. "Young man, you're going to suffer a bloody disaster!"

Li Banfeng drew his sickle. "You got it right. That's why I'm here to take revenge on you!"

The fortune-teller ran away, and Li Banfeng continued onward.

An inn clerk came out to greet him. "Sir, are you looking for a room?"

Li Banfeng asked, "How much?"

"A superior room is eighty for one night."

Li Banfeng held out his hand. "Give me the money."

The clerk stared blankly in confusion at Li Banfeng. "You're staying at my inn, and I'm supposed to give you money?"

Li Banfeng drew the Tang Saber. "I'm not staying here. I'm robbing you."

"Take care, sir."

The clerk ran away too.

Despite his hostile and violent demeanor, Li Banfeng did not dare say too much to them. These people were inferior to Li Banfeng in terms of cultivation level, but when it came to Folly abilities, they were all his seniors. Folly abilities ignored the differences in cultivation levels. If Li Banfeng said just a few words too many, he could fall into their trap.

After walking for more than half an hour, Li Banfeng finally found Changsan Literary House.

A young woman came out to greet him. She wore an emerald-green qipao decorated with joyous magpies heralding the arrival of spring. Her long hair was pinned up in a bun at the back of her head with a hairpin. Her slightly wavy fringe draped down and framed her delicate facial features. The only flaw was that she had applied a bit too much foundation, covering up her natural complexion.

"Sir, come in and have a seat," the young woman said sweetly. She linked arms with Li Banfeng, led him into the literary house, and poured him a cup of tea.

Li Banfeng smiled. "Miss, what should I call you?"

"My name is Yanhong."

"And what are your rates?"

"Oh, my~ Sir, you're too much," Yanhong chided him. "You've come to a literary house, and you're asking me about my rates? Doesn't that diminish the refined and elegant attitude of a scholar?"

"My apologies for being so forward. How much is the tuition fee for a lesson here?"

Yanhong smiled and sat on Li Banfeng's lap. "Sir, this is Changsan Literary House. Tea, wine service, and lodging are all three yuan."

Li Banfeng took out ten silver dollars and pressed them into Yanhong's hand.

Yanhong panicked. "Oh, my! Sir, you've given me so much. I don't even know how I should serve you."

Li Banfeng shook his head. "You don't need to serve me. I just need you to tell me a few things. Are you dead or alive?"

Yanhong frowned. "What kind of question is that? Of course, I'm alive."

"How do you know you're alive?"

"I have blood and flesh, and I can still breathe while sitting here. Of course, I'm alive."

"How did the flesh on your body get attached?"

Yanhong stood up and glared at Li Banfeng. "Are you here to cause trouble?"

Li Banfeng took another ten silver dollars from his inner chest pocket. "I just want to ask a few questions."

Yanhong snapped, "So what if you have money? Does having money mean you can behave so atrociously here?"

Her yell drew the attention of many other young women in the literary house. They peeked over to see what was happening.

Tang Changfa, who managed the literary house for Li Banfeng, came out carrying a rod. "Let's see who dares cause trouble here!"

Yanhong pointed at Li Banfeng. "It's him!"

Tang Changfa stared at Li Banfeng for a moment, then he swung his rod and smacked Yanhong on her peach.

Yanhong rubbed her peach, her eyes stinging with tears. "Why did you hit me? He's the one causing trouble here!"

Tang Changfa snapped, "He's our boss! You still dare say he's causing trouble? I think you're just asking for a beating!"

He gave Yanhong several more smacks on her peach. Yanhong covered her peach as tears welled in her eyes. She did not dare say even one more word.

Li Banfeng stopped Tang Changfa. "Don't hit the young lady. I was only asking her a few questions."

Tang Changfa tossed aside the rod and smiled. "Boss, she doesn't know anything. Just ask me if you have questions."

"Fine, then I'll ask you. Are you alive?"

Tang Changfa's lips spread into a wide grin. "Of course! I'm definitely alive!"

"How do you know you're alive?"

"Can a dead man talk to you?"

That's a very convincing answer!

"How did the flesh on your body get attached?"

"It grew on my bones from the time I was little!"

Tang Changfa's smile did not falter in the slightest. He answered quickly and smoothly, with exceptional speaking skill and attitude. No matter how he was questioned, he never lost his temper.

This has a great deal to do with cultivation. Learning from the person with the highest cultivation would give the best chance of success.

Is Tang Changfa the person with the highest cultivation level here? I can't be subjective about this.

Li Banfeng called all the other young women downstairs and had them stand in a row, then he questioned them one by one.

"Miss, what should I call you?"

"My name is Yancui'er."

"Are you alive?"

Yancui'er said aggrievedly, "I am alive."

She's already aggrieved after just one question. She's far inferior to Tang Changfa; her speaking skills and attitude are lacking.

Li Banfeng asked the next young woman, "Miss, what should I call you?"

"My name is Yanqing'er."

"Are you alive?"

Yanqing'er answered, "Yes."

She showed no emotion, but there was a hint of resentment in her voice. Her speaking skills and attitude are also inferior to Tang Changfa's.

Li Banfeng then asked the next person, "Elder Brother, what should I call you?"

"My name is Sun Tiecheng."

"Are you alive?"

Sun Tiecheng answered, "What the fuck are you trying to do?"

1. In case anyone forgot or can’t figure it out... she’s talking about her butt and boobs. ☜