Chapter 72: An Actual Method

A few days had passed since Adonis had some palace guards quietly carry an unconscious Claire back to the Emerald Palace.

With his crazy sister gone, Adonis could finally focus on his current problem.

The nuns still liked Lloyd more.

’This is so stupid, it must be his talent with a sword and that [Light Magic] of his...’

Adonis thought as he bitterly scrubbed a stubborn stain out of a nun’s habit.

’It’s a derivative of [Holy Magic], after all. In a church, that’s basically a halo.’

He was prettier than Lloyd, more charming, and had a much better personality. Yet none of that seemed to matter. The nuns washed Lloyd’s clothes, they baked him sweets and brought him delicacies, they chatted with him by the fountain, and some of them even let him rest his head on their laps.

Then they’d go to church and ask for forgiveness for it, then do it again the next day.

Meanwhile, Adonis and the other men washed the nuns’ habits, all of them, from the bras to the panties.

They ate plain soup, plain chicken, and plain everything, and sweets were a myth.

They could chat with the maids, but saying anything dirty was a no-no. You’d be thrown into the Confession Fountain to ask for forgiveness for a full day.

If he couldn’t even say a naughty word, there was no way these pretty nuns would let him use heir thighs as pillows.

But Adonis always had a plan.

Years of playing all kinds of dating sims and reading countless romance novels had made him a top expert. His little sister once called him the most useless therapist she’d ever met, but this wasn’t therapy.

This was a conquest!

In the following days, Adonis was suddenly very active.

He swept the courtyard before sunrise, polished the pews until he could see his reflection, sang the hymns loud enough to be heard from the kitchen, and he prayed so earnestly that his brothers wondered when this incarnation of lust became a saint.

"Is that the fifth prince?"

"Why is he suddenly so diligent?"

"Maybe the Confession Fountain finally broke him."

Adonis ignored them and wiped the corridor windows.

Through the glass, he could see the garden. Lloyd was resting on a bench with his head on a nun’s lap. She stroked his hair with a shy face and pink cheeks.

Lloyd opened one purple eye and noticed him.

"Hey. Make sure you clean those windows well. That’s actually my chore, so I’m glad you’re doing it properly."

Adonis turned and smiled brightly.

"I’ll make sure to do it well, Brother Lloyd!"

There was a vein throbbing on his forehead.

’I’m going to kill him. I’m going to take this cloth and strangle him with it. Resting on a lap in broad daylight, you smug bastard! You couldn’t even say please?!’

The smile on his face didn’t move an inch.

The nun looked over, blinking at the golden-haired brother who was scrubbing the window so hard it squeaked.

"Oh... you’ve been working so hard. What’s your name?"

"It’s Adonis—"

"He’s nobody important."

Lloyd cut him off, wrapped both arms around her waist, and buried his face in her stomach.

"Please leave the hardworking prince alone."

The nun giggled. "Ahaha, that won’t be too hard."

’Prince?’ Adonis thought. ’She already knew?’

’...Well, it doesn’t matter.’

He kept smiling and kept wiping.

It was always like this.

When Adonis was mopping the chapel floor, Lloyd would walk by with a flock of nuns around him, one carrying his sword, one fixing his collar, and one feeding him a piece of candied fruit. When Adonis was hanging laundry, Lloyd would pass beneath the line and nod at him like a lord inspecting a servant.

The only difference between Lloyd and Leander was that Lloyd was calmer, and a lot less hostile. He never started fights, even though Adonis had offended him badly enough, especially over the matter of Big Sister Noelle.

Speaking of Noelle...

"Come out, whoever you are!"

Adonis was crouched inside a rose bush, completely still.

Twenty meters away, a woman in white robes stood in the middle of the garden with her hands on her hips, long hair swaying, her eyes shut tight as she swept her [Holy Magic] over the grounds.

Noelle had great talent with it.

[Holy Magic] could be used to detect people, and she’d been using it to hunt him down for days.

"I know you’re here! I can sense you! I just don’t know where!"

Adonis held his breath. ?_?

"You can’t hide forever! I only want to know your name! You don’t have to be so reclusive!"

"..."

"...Are you a child?! Only a little child doesn’t know how to have a simple conversation with a woman! Come out right now!"

Leaves rustled in the wind.

Adonis watched her through the branches with half-lidded eyes looking very unbothered.

"Why are these women so pushy?" he muttered.

After a long, angry silence, Noelle stomped away.

He crawled out of the bush, brushed the petals off him, and went right back to his daily routine of cleaning every inch of the church. And from now on, whenever he met a nun with working ears, he’d say the same thing.

"Hello, Sister. My name is Adonis."

"Good morning, Sister! I’m Adonis."

"Thank you for the tea, Sister. By the way, it’s Adonis."

Soon the whole convent knew who he was.

The kitchen nuns slipped him little sweets and now they specially put seasoning on his chicken.

The other men stared at his plate with jealous eyes.

"Why does he get the garlic?"

"I haven’t tasted garlic in two years..."

"That bastard."

Lloyd noticed the change eventually.

He walked up to Adonis in the dining hall while the prince was quietly eating.

"Listen, wastrel Prince. Don’t think you have an edge on the nuns just because they’re being nice to you now. I’ve been a member of this Church for a long time. They’ll always want me more."

"..."

Adonis chewed.

"I’m telling you this as a senior. Don’t get carried away."

"..."

Adonis kept chewing.

"...Are you listening?"

"..."

"Can’t you hear me?!"

Adonis sighed and waved him away dismissively.

"Wow, you’re really sad."

"Mu!"

Lloyd was short of words.

...

After that was the morning of the commencement.

The whole convent was about to head to the announcement hall for the opening of Spiritual Week, and Adonis was kneeling in the hostel room with two folded bundles held high over his head.

"Pleeease."

Alpis and Prussia stared down at him.

"It’s just to instigate a little! You don’t have to do anything other than that, okay? Just a little!"

Alpis puffed out her small chest and folded her arms, floating a few centimeters off the ground.

"Hmph! Do you know who you’re talking to, master? I’m an imperial dragon! I’ve been offered countless sacrifices! Entire villages once knelt before me! I can’t be charmed by your looks, and I certainly can’t be bribed by whatever you have to offer!"

"I understand, I understand."

Adonis nodded sadly.

"Then I guess I’ll have to throw away this nun attire I stayed up all night designing for you."

He unfolded one of the bundles.

A dark-blue mini pinafore dress with a short white dress beneath it, puffy sleeves, and a pair of white thigh-high socks.

Alpis was holding it before he finished.

She hugged it against her chest with eyes shining like stars.

"A-, Alright! I’ll do it! I’ll help you, master!"

"Heh, good girl. Prussia?"

Prussia stood by the window with her arms crossed and her face turned away.

"I told you, I don’t like being part of your schemes because I never know what you’re planning. Every time you say it’s ’just a little’ or ’it’s harmless’ then someone ends up crying."

"This time no one will cry."

"That’s what you said last time."

She glanced at the bundle in his hand and quickly looked away again, her ears were a little pink.

"I’m just saying I’m not... that kind of woman. So don’t think a dress will—"

Adonis slithered closer on his knees. He nudged her in the side with his elbow, and Prussia flinched.

"Miss Prussia..."

"...!"

"Prussia..."

"D-, Don’t call my name like that."

"Pruuussiaaa..."

Now her entire face was bright red.

Adonis held up the other dress in front of her.

"I made the skirt short, the way I like it. I was already imagining how pretty you’d look in it—!"

He didn’t get to finish.

The dress was snatched out of his hands and clutched against her robust chest. Prussia is burning red, her eyes were looking at the ceiling, and she huffed like a proud cat.

"FINE!"

And that’s how things ended up here.

"Did the Holy Mother just call him Nonie?"

"Isn’t that... like... a pet name?"

"Why would she know a nickname for the fifth prince? Are they that close? I thought he was a nobody."

"No, no, think about it. Mother Euphemia never calls anyone by anything but their full name!"

Right beside them, a cute, small head popped up between two nuns.

"Oh, you didn’t know?"

The nuns jumped.

Alpis was floating at shoulder height, her hand cupped beside her mouth, and a face full of innocence.

"I saw him sneaking into her room one night. And when he came out, the Holy Mother was looking quite sore which on stands to reason he hammered her hard. What a man, that Adonis."

"...?!"

"What?!"

"Don’t tell anyone~" Alpis whispered, then drifted away like a cloud.

The two nuns looked at each other, then they turned to the sister next to them.

"Did you hear—"

By then Prussia had heard another group whispering about whether he’d ever slept in the Holy Mother’s chambers, and she was already there, ready to instigate.

"Forgive me for overhearing. I’m only a visitor here but I’ve seen him carrying a basket of grapes to her room twice already."

"Grapes?!"

"And he calls her ’Phemie’ when no one’s around."

"PHEMIE?!"

She nodded once and walked off.

By the time the roll call ended, a single rumor had been passed through every row of the hall, and getting wilder and more erotic with each retelling.

The summary is simple; Adonis and Mother Euphemia were in a secret, forbidden relationship.

Euphemia, at the front, lifted her head from the scroll.

Dozens of nuns were whispering, glancing between her and the men’s line with cheeks flushed pink.

She raised a brow.

...Hm? She had no idea what was going on.

On the other side, Adonis let out a yawn.

"Huh?"

Many of the nuns were now looking at him.

And not with the cold judgment they used to give the men. This was soft. Their eyes were round and a little shiny, with a shy sort of warmth, the kind of look a woman gave a man only when she was completely charmed by him.

Adonis rubbed his chin.

’Heh. Playing dating sims will never lead you wrong.’

He once played an office dating sim where he’d told everyone at work his name was Josh. But to the hot girl from accounting, he’d said Joshy. Whenever she called him that, every other guy in the office assumed she’s already lost, and backed off. And even better, all the other hotties in the office saw that the prettiest girl had picked him, and they fell for him too.

[Ding! Sister Nina has developed feelings for you!]

[Sister Odile is in love with you!]

[Sister Illia’s affection toward you has increased to 9!]

[Sister Colette has a crush on you!]

[Sister Imelda has a crush on you!]

(+50 more notifications)

The panel kept scrolling and scrolling.

’Heh, an actual method that never fails.’

On the dais, Noelle had seen all of it.

She gritted her teeth and glared at her aloof mother, who was calmly sipping her tea after the roll call, as if none of this was her business.

’Is this true? Is it really true...?’

The fan in her hand trembled.

An anger didn’t last, a moment later her face softened, and her lips pressed together like she was about to cry.

’It’s always like this with Mother...’

She looked down at her lap.

Euphemia noticed none of it.

She simply tilted her head at the whispering nuns, then at the men’s line, and said quietly to herself:

"...Why is everyone staring?"