The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Chapter 308: I Can Do Whatever I Want Because I’m Rich!

Translator: imperfectluck Editor: Pranav

“My fireball will tear you apart!”

“Ha! Taste my gunfire!”

In Arlo’s arena, a high-level mage was dueling with a ranger. Normally speaking, the ranger would continuously adjust the distance and angle between them, making all sorts of fancy movements to dodge the mage’s spells in order to find a chance at landing a winning attack. However, if the ranger happened to have a steed, the ranger would have an even greater advantage in mobility and the number of their attacks.

Meanwhile, the typical tactics of a high-level mage were the opposite. The mage would cast a bunch of defensive magic spells on themselves and then summon a bunch of cannon fodder. They would finally balance attack and defense magic spells and search for a chance to defeat the opponent.

This was still a duel between an elf ranger and a mage. However, the spectators didn’t really understand what was going on this time.

This purple-haired elf ranger wasn’t wielding the elves’ typical weapon, an enchanted longbow. Instead, this ranger was wielding a dwarven gun that the elves typically looked down upon as being unreliable—it would often self-destruct and explode. Nor was this ranger using a typical forest’s holy unicorn as the steed. Instead, the ranger rode on a boomingly loud Iron Horse.

This royal elf [1] 1 was wearing a black punk-style jacket and a leather cap. One hand skillfully controlled the Iron Horse in rapidly circling around the arena, jumping around, going up the wall, making sudden stops, standing on one wheel, and all sorts of other fancy tricks.

His other hand held a silver shotgun, and he continuously attacked his opponent whenever he saw an opening. Compared to dwarven firearms’ typically lead bullets with low attack power, this gun used high-quality diamond bullets with an outer covering of silver and magic paint. The bullets glimmered in all different sorts of colors.

The handsome elf ranger seemed to be extremely confident in his own skills. His movements were quite smooth, and he would occasionally swing his shotgun in midair, causing the ammo to automatically reload. His hair that flowed in the wind made him look really cool. Many female audience members shrieked their support for him.

Yet the elf ranger’s opponent didn’t care about any of his actions. This mage clad in silver armor ignored all of the ranger’s attacks and merely stood still. The mage casted all sorts of spells such as blizzard magic, frost magic, hail magic, and ice pillar magic. Lots of high-level area of effect magic spells rained down, as if this mage possessed limitless amounts of mana.

Meanwhile, the ranger’s magical shotgun would shoot large holes into the arena’s walls and ground with every missed bullet, but they merely bounced off the mage’s armor with blinding sparks. Concurrently, the mage’s constant bombardment of AOE magic caused the Iron Horse-riding ranger to have to dash all around the arena.

The ranger’s attack power wasn’t low at all. The Gold-ranked ranger Ade was already skilled enough with the shotgun to use the elves’ special magic arrow techniques with it. The only reason the mage was able to ignore his attacks was that the mage’s armor had a ridiculously high defense power.

The mage was wearing silver armor that covered his entire body. The fact that every last bit of skin was covered meant that nobody could even see his face. Under the obsidian crystal face mask was an expression that was as calm as still water. The armor’s outer layer shone with a special glow that was unique to mithril. Magic enchantments on the armor provided it with an additional three protective layers of defense, while the attention-grabbing dragon crystal on the armor’s chest emanated frighteningly powerful waves of mana. No matter how rich anyone was, they would all shout “just where did this mega-rich person come from!” upon seeing such a suit of armor.

Also, the silver thorned rose emblem on the mecha armor’s back doubtlessly indicated that this mecha armor was Thorn Garden’s newest product: I Can Do Whatever I Want Because I’m Rich! #1. Yep, from a certain standpoint, this somewhat strange name I had given to this suit of mithril was the best explanation of its properties.

The mecha armor’s internal batteries provided force, ice, and thunder; three different types of defensive layers. The thick armor was constructed entirely out of mithril, the best magical metal of all. These four combined layers of physical and magical defense caused Ade’s magical diamond bullets to be unable to pierce the armor even the slightest bit. The bullets hit the armor in a continuous stream only to ricochet off of it. They were deflected by the magical barriers as well, causing Ade to become quite frustrated.

It was simple common sense that a duel when one side was completely unable to harm the other would mean that it would be one-sided. Unless something happened to overturn the situation, the popular elf ranger Ade, who was currently on a winning streak in the arena, was destined to lose.

“It’s over!”

When Ade’s Iron Horse drove over a layer of ice created by some blizzard magic, the wheels suddenly went skidding. Right when Ade lost control of his Iron Horse, a prison of ice descended upon him. Now that the elf was trapped with nowhere to go—an easy target for the mage’s next major spell—Ade unhesitatingly rose his hands up in surrender.

“…That mage has won fifteen duels in a row. Even ‘Blood Moon Hunter’ Ade has lost to him, and it’s still so one-sided. That armor is just ridiculous.”

In the Cloud Tower, the mages and warriors that loved to fight had the arena as one of their few source of entertainment. The arena was also one of the very few places where mages would actually gamble in the Mage Country. The Abo Arena was one such arena where countless duels would happen every day. The types of duels included training duels for gaining practical experience, duels to simply see who was better, duels between teacher and student for the purpose of teaching, and of course duels between enemies that were seriously trying to kill each other. However, today’s duel was the most common type of duel, just a regular duel that spectators could gamble on who the winner would be.

A regular duel would mean that battles wouldn’t be to the death, and both sides would be wagering something on it. This would help both sides gain combat experience as well as help the victor obtain tangible benefits and reputation. However, since most mages weren’t interested in personally entering the arena, most arena duel participants were actually in warrior and ranger-type job classes despite this being the Mage Country. The participants of these duels were typically non-mage residents of the Mage Country or some mage’s bodyguards.

The ranger Ade was the bodyguard of an royal elf prince. Ade was considered a famous ranger back in his hometown, and after he purchased an Iron Horse and magical shotgun from Thorn Garden, he was able to speedily learn a series of self-taught high-speed Iron Horse riding and shooting skills. Many of his opponents that actually had higher power level rankings than he did were all defeated by his high-speed, high-mobility attacking style.

However, after Ade reached ten consecutive victories, he met the most difficult opponent he had ever faced in the arena—this mage who wore a full-body mithril mecha armor. This mage’s armor would make even a dragon seem poor in comparison.

The mage didn’t need to pay any attention to his own positioning or cast any defensive magic spells. He merely had to stand there without moving in his heavy mecha armor, and none of his opponents in the arena had been able to break through its defense. Then, the mage would simply utter long magical incantations at his leisure and act as a stationary artillery. If the mage ran out of mana, he could even replenish his mana using the mecha armor’s battery packs. With ridiculously high defense and nearly limitless mana, it was definitely a shameless tactic.

“Go, I’m Ridiculously Rich!”

“Be careful, a dragon might rob you when you go outdoors!”

The spectators were cheering on this newly rising arena star. “I’m Ridiculously Rich” was the nickname that this mage signed up for arena battles with, and nobody knew the mage’s real identity. Even though the mage was clearly using only Silver rank magic spells at best, he managed to forcefully defeat many powerful opponents, including two who were at the Legend rank!

If Ade’s self-mastered, self-taught new techniques based on the new technology gave evidence that new technologies could improve combat strength, then I’m Ridiculously Rich proved an even more basic maxim of the world: the rich would always be the most powerful.

When this mage in the brilliantly shining silver armor strode back to his personal resting area in the arena, he suddenly collapsed on the ground, as the armor started venting large amounts of steam from its exhaust pipes.

Meanwhile, several dwarf and gnome engineers had long since been ready and waiting. They immediately started working on the armor’s maintenance. When the armor’s helmet was removed, a younger face than one might expect was revealed underneath.

“Cohen, how do you feel?”

That’s right, the real identity of “I’m Ridiculously Rich” wasn’t a high-level archmage. Instead, he was my acolyte, Cohen, a Four Elemental Swordcaster who barely even counted as a Silver ranker.

“…With a dragon crystal’s mana replenishing my own mana, I can basically cast spells without ever running out of mana. But dragon crystals are so expensive…”

“No worries. Just have fun out there and treat it as valuable experience. As for the dragon crystal and other magical materials? Relax. Someone else is footing the bill for us.”

In my previous world, war was always the greatest stimulant for technological innovation. Only when humans were forced to the brink would they bring out their unreliable and untested technologies and think of methods to use these undeveloped technologies for slaughtering the enemy.

Magical engineering was a new area of science that was born as a result of war as well, and it, too, was destined to grow through war. The resulting products were immensely popular when I started selling them through Thorn Garden for the first time. For example, the two types of mechas which I named after elements from Star Wars , the Sith Warriors and Jedis, became highly accoladed right after I started selling them on the market.

I actually didn’t expect how popular my Star Wars mechas would become. I hadn’t even intended to make them the store’s main products because although both mecha types greatly increased the pilot’s mobility and defensive power, not to mention they were equipped with portable batteries, the fact of the matter was that they were still constructed out of ordinary metals. This would have an evident impact on the efficiency of casting spells. Although the Four Elemental Swordcasters and Magic Gunners that relied on “outside help” for their magical combat strength could ignore the interference of metal on mana, pure mages obviously wouldn’t find these Star Wars mechas to be the most efficient environment to cast magic spells in.

What I underestimated was… just how rich the mages were!

Indeed. Current technology was limited, but the mages’ wealth was limitless. As long as I changed out every part in a Star Wars mecha to the highest quality materials available, there would be a huge difference in quality even if the blueprint for the mecha was identical. Ultimately, the highest quality materials were all magical. The resulting mecha armor would be on an entirely different level if all the parts were exchanged for the highest-quality magical materials.

Metal affected casting spells? Well, it wouldn’t affect casting spells if it was the highest quality magic metal, mithril! This mecha armor was constructed entirely out of the best quality mithril crafted by master alchemists. Of course, it was just slightly more expensive than usual, approximately one hundred times more expensive than gold.

Lacking mana replenishment magic materials? What about equipping it with a basketful of dragon crystals! There were also plenty of phoenix feathers and great demon’s hearts! We could even sell you giant wolf king skins by the dozen as long as you have the money. We were even capable of supplying inferno dragon eyes, which could only be found in the lower dimensions.

You don’t know how to etch defensive magical spell arrays? Emblem of Endless Truth level enchanter archmages can do that for you. Would you like to have the spell “Absolute Defense,” “Precise Long-Distance Teleportation,” or “Meteor Rain” etched into your personal mecha armor as defense spells? What? You only want to etch some four-circle magic spells? You dare to look down on us?

You’re worried about our mecha armors being overly heavy, causing the speed to become slow? Are you joking with me? Have you ever heard of gnome rocket backpacks? Plus, we can just etch a few extra anti-gravity spell arrays that will lessen the weight of the mecha. After all, we have plenty of top-level magical materials available.

Right, don’t forget about our elf artisans’ enhancements. I wanted angel feathers on the helmet, the mecha’s appearance must be in the currently popular steampunk style, with two volcanoes tattooed on the shoulders, and illusion magic that constantly spews out magma? Cool, right? I also wanted an eyepatch with three red-glowing deep emeralds, along with an evil dragon’s eye!

Alright then, apart from my personal requests which caused everyone around me to wonder at my sense of aesthetics and how chuunibyou I was, the other archmages ordered much more normal suits of mecha armor. They all wanted practical customizations that would improve their personal safety. The most important part was that they were plenty rich, with countless treasures horded over the years. After these mages discovered, from my previous announcement, that they might be forced into battle against powerful future opponents, they were now naturally willing to part with their money in order to protect their lives.

I did some slight calculations and unhesitatingly tossed the job of creating the mechas to others, while I personally took care of the most profitable part: negotiating the orders for the armors.

The prerequisite for such long-term orders was that we needed to deliver on what we were paid to do. Being paid such high prices meant that we had to deliver high-quality goods. And if I wanted to attract more and more rich customers who were willing to pay the ridiculously high prices and even invest in us, I would have to show them high-quality goods worthy enough for them to pay the price.

That was why a weak mage novice like Cohen was now wearing the I Can Do Whatever I Want Because I’m Rich! Mecha #1 and battling in the arena. Plenty of top-level archmages witnessed his battles, and some top-level mages even personally tried dueling him in order to test this ridiculously pricey ‘armor of money’s’ true defense power. After the archmages found out that the pilot was merely a novice who had started learning magic less than two years ago, they unhesitatingly tripled the amount of money they were paying me, swearing that their personal customized mecha armors would surpass this #1 model that Cohen was wearing.

Actually, I heaved a great sigh of relief at receiving the mages’ money. I would have otherwise been forced to think of some idea to come up with the funding for all the top-level magical materials.

Why was I lacking magical materials? Well, I hadn’t started the work on the other magic mechas. Back in the old times, when tailors stocked up on cloth to make clothes, there was an unspoken rule about how the amount of cloth they ordered and the amount of cloth they had in stock would never exactly match up. Each roll of cloth would be ever so slightly shorter than what was listed. And after making several sets of clothes, the tailor would mysteriously have enough cloth left over for a set of clothes for himself.

I didn’t have that many top-level magic materials in stock. The “I Can Do Whatever I Want Because I’m Rich! #1” was created using the funds from the pre-orders I had received beforehand. If I couldn’t receive enough orders to continue funding the magic materials I needed, it would form a huge hole that I would need to fill in somehow.

I gave Cohen some encouragement. My goals here were both for him to accumulate practical combat experience as well as to show off Thorn Garden’s power and combat strength. It would also make for an excellent test run for the mecha armor. I couldn’t help but sigh and exclaim at how things were going.

“The mecha armors’ functions have far succeeded our original expectations. I suppose that this is the saying of how even an inventor can never predict the effects of his own invention? I originally thought that this phrase was just nonsense. I never thought I would one day be proved wrong.”

Just thinking about how my butterfly effect would cause the top-level archmages to be well-armed to the teeth when entering battle, turning them from their former glass cannon selves into movable impregnable artilleries—forbidden spell mages would no longer be so easily picked off by assassins in the shadows—I felt that the game’s “history” would definitely take a different path.

“By the time we face demons equipped with powerful huge swords from antiquity and Evil Gods riding gigantic wild beasts, our side will have archmages wearing mecha armors and rangers zooming around the battlefield on Iron Horses. We’ll also have taurens equipped with heavy cannons and zombies with electric saws… Hrm, teamfighting like this makes it feel like there’s something wrong with the drawing style, though.

There was plenty of work waiting for us after we left the arena. I had unknowingly become the largest weapons dealer in the Cloud Tower, and I now had to check on the progress of another program of mine.

This program wasn’t one so honest and open that it could see the light of day.

It took an entire two hours by horse-drawn carriage to finally reach our destination. We crossed several mountains and rivers, and it was almost completely dark outside before we finally arrived at a graveyard outside the city of Arlo.

It was already dusk, and a chilly wind swept through the mountains. The trees around us shook as if they were possessed by demons. Our horses seemed to be spooked by something as they collapsed listlessly on the ground, refusing to go on any further.

“Sigh. Every time, I can only go the rest of the way by foot after reaching here.”

“No wonder the ‘Soul Demon Association’ loves this place so much. The negative energy here almost matches the scale of negative energy in the Undead Planes. It would be strange for corpses to not become undead after entering such a graveyard. Judging from the surrounding environment, this place should be the byproduct of some failed experiment.

Since she was a half undead living creature, Harloys had always been particularly interested in this location. I could see the black cat appearing and vanishing in the shadows of this remote mountainous location, which really did make this place seem like one right out of a ghost story.

“Look over there, it’s so out of the way, but there’s still a crop field here.”

“Hmph! That’s definitely a secret scout for the Soul Demon Association. Do you think that any crops planted here would be harvestable? The only harvestable product here are the zombies.”

Alright then, I actually knew it as well. Nobody but the insane would think of planting crops in such a location with chilly winds and negative energy.

Although we were cooperating with the Soul Demon Association in trading our money for their magic information, it was evident that they were still intent on collecting information on us. They had planted a scout next to this area of land we had purchased which was filled with negative energy.

Well, we did have a goal with this land, after all.

“How’s the big guy’s condition?”

Harloys sat there quietly on the ground, and her eyes seemed rather hollow and unresponsive. However, this simply meant that her clones were currently gathering information for her. Soon enough, her eyes filled with the light of life again.

“Excellent. It’s already entered a semi-hibernation period. It should be able to move around after two more weeks or so.”

I nodded in satisfaction. Since everything was going smoothly, we would simply need to return here in two weeks to harvest the end product.

“…It’s just that the brats from the Soul Demon Association kept coming over to check things out. It seems that they still haven’t given up on finding out just why we purchased this piece of land. Heh, can’t blame them. You are Yongye, after all. It’s only natural for ordinary undead mages to be curious what you’re up to.”

“Let them look around all they want. They won’t be able to discover anything, anyways. Who would imagine that what we really want is simply the ground here that’s filled with negative energy? Our goal isn’t a singular new undead, but an entire group. Our new product is this entire graveyard, that’s all.”

We recently created and named this new undead species as graveyard demons. They were half-undead, half-elemental creatures created by large amounts of negative energy corroding the earth. Graveyard demons were powerful sources of negative energy pollution. Not only were they capable of strengthening other undead, but they were even hosts for medium and small-sized undead.

These undead creatures weren’t our original invention. In ancient times, there was a similar existence among the undead, but no such creatures existed in recent times. This was an experimental species that we recreated using modern technology and knowledge from ancient texts.

When I was in the Forest of Dreams, what I envied the most was the forest’s home turf advantage and Jill’s ability to change the environment. Even if one couldn’t choose the environment to fight in, one would be able to change the environment to a more advantageous one.

That was the use of graveyard demons. They were moving graveyards from which undead could replenish their negative energy, exchange body parts, and power up combat strength. Any injured undead that wasn’t completely dead would be able to recover quite quickly when within a graveyard demon.

The wood spirits’ method of battling had given me inspiration. Perhaps the undead didn’t actually need powerful troop types anymore. What the undead lacked was a job class that could heal them like druids or priests could for the living—a supporting job class. The undead were supposed to excel at attrition to begin with. If they had the ability to heal themselves on the battlefield, their overall fighting capabilities would increase to be far more than any other fighting undead species.

Of course, we didn’t come all the way for just this alone.

A crow landed on the black cat’s head before transforming into a silver liquid that combined with her body. When Harloys received her flying clone’s information, she slightly nodded, which greatly delighted me.

“The big fish has finally been hooked?”

Note:

[1] ED/N: Royal elves are those of the Four Elven Aristocracies. All previous instances of superior/upper elves mean the same, and I’ll change them in the future. It is to distinguish them from the extinct high elves.