The Duke's Passion

"I'm so glad..." 

Charlotte's expression softened as the young master cried. I could see that Law was trying not to cry, but he was probably overwhelmed by what happened. He was still a child, after all. 

"I was... so worried..." Law hiccuped through his gritted teeth while rubbing his eyes. "... I thought... they will take... Mother."

"Young Master, your father will never let that happen."

"Does she hate me...?" he inquired and there was a sudden tension in my throat upon hearing it. "Did... Mother runs away because she hates me and Father?"

"No, of course not! The Madam is just confused. Why would you think like that?"

"You're just saying that..." Law hiccuped and paused for a long time. My eyes burned for reasons unknown, making me avert my eyes from him. Why would he think I hate him? No. He wasn't my son, and I was not his mother. He must be confused, not me. 

"Mother hates me because..." his hiccups grew worse that Charlotte had to tell him not to cry anymore, but he didn't listen. "... she hates me because she gave birth to me."

"What?" I blurted out under my breath, but it seemed my voice didn't reach them.

"Young master, that's not true...!"

"Because of me, she was asleep for a long time. Mother... wouldn't be in that state... if she didn't have me." 

My heart broke into many pieces listening to him. I wanted to tell him I didn't hate him, but I could only stand in the corner and listen in silence. Charlotte consoled the child until he had finally fallen asleep crying. She glanced at me apologetically but said nothing. 

We didn't speak as Charlotte tucked the two boys in. Even when she left and returned with a clean cloth and a barrel of water, silence reigned in the room. 

I watched Charlotte wipe Law with a clean cloth and then Adam, the young Lord of Minowa. After wiping the dirt off of them, she tended to their wounds and put an ointment on them before changing their clothes. I didn't have the leisure to admire Charlotte's newfound skills in being an efficient maid as my eyes fixated on Law.

'Had he been blaming himself all this time?' I wondered, feeling guilty about it. The silence granted me enough time to think and recall my memories before my long slumber. 

Back then, I nearly died at the hands of Alphonse. Before I lost consciousness, he congratulated me for having a child. If I put two and two together, I could assume Law was actually my son. But how?

I was unconscious for the past five years! How could I carry a child and give birth if I was asleep?

I just had too many questions, but no answer. So I waited patiently for Charlotte to finish tending to the children. 

When she let out a sharp exhale and perched on the edge of the bed, I snapped my tongue to catch her attention. I cocked my head towards the set of armchairs and pulled myself away from the wall. I strutted towards them, plopping my butt down on the divan. 

"Let's talk, Charlie." I pointed at the armchair across from me. "Sit."

"Alright..." she sighed heavily. 

Charlotte was still on the bed and pursed her lips. She reluctantly dragged her feet and sat in the chair across from me. It was obvious she didn't want to be interrogated, but I needed some questions to be answered. 

She looked at me awkwardly, holding her hand on her lap. I let the silence get to her before my lips parted.

"How come I had a child?" was my first question. "I didn't recall until now that Alphonse told me I was with a child. However, I was in slumber for five years. It doesn't make sense, Charlie."

Charlotte looked at me with hesitation but still explained the best she could. "Thing is, you are not entirely in slumber throughout the five years, Your Majesty. You are always half-conscious, but unresponsive and, at least once a month, you wake up."

"Huh?"

"Your Majesty, what I'm saying is, you are simply unresponsive but you still open your eyes and make subtle movements." She repeated with some added information to make it more clear to me. "And once a month, you get your consciousness back."

My brows furrowed, as I couldn't remember waking up throughout the past five years. Charlotte looked at me with a conflicted look and cleared her throat, detailing what she meant by that.

According to her, there would be a time of the month where I was responsive and had control over my body. However, the Lilou that awakened every month was not the Lilou they all knew. They figured that out when I first awoke after the first month of my slumber.

The palace, which was still in the process of recovering, and still had no official king, once again fell into a night of terror. The culprit? It was me. 

The Lilou that would awaken every month for the past five years was vicious and cold-blooded. Charlotte said I even hurt Sam, although she didn't give me the details and swore she'd rather die than detail it. That alone was enough for me to understand that whatever I did to him was something I could never forgive myself.

To keep me from doing something I would regret later, Sam would lock me in in a dungeon during those times of the month. He would accompany me all night, though. But still, I could imagine how painful it was for him to lock his wife because she was turning into a beast without her knowledge.

Because of that, I was able to carry the child and give birth. However, birthing Law came with huge consequences. 

"What did you say?" I asked in disbelief, as her previous words didn't register in my head properly. Charlotte looked at me with hesitation, pursing her lips into a thin line. 

"Charlie, did you say I died?" 

She bit her lower lip, letting out a sigh before nodding with her eyes fixed on me. "Yes, Your Majesty.. You died giving birth to the young master."