Novel Full Chapter 577: Undeniable Truths
Chapter 577: Undeniable Truths
"..." I look around, realizing I’m inside a sea of blood that seems to stretch on infinitely, the smell, however, isn’t blood, the place has an undeniably sweet scent that reminds me of something, though I’m not sure what.
"A nightmare?...That’s rare..." I almost never have dreams, my body, which is in a constant state of alert and readiness, can’t enter a state calm enough to be able to dream or have nightmares.
The only times it’s happened were times when I was at my limit, or times when I passed out, but they were really dreams, this is the first time I’ve had a nightmare that’s so blatantly a nightmare.
"..." I bend down, looking into the depths of the blood, I can make out grotesquely deformed shapes below, they’re all people I like, by the tail I can recognize Delphina, and by the wings I recognize Zephyra.
’What grotesque deformities... although seeing organs like this makes me a little hungry...’ There are several copies of them around, each with different deformities, I can even see some that are friends like Lilith and Velvet.
"What is this supposed to mean? Was I supposed to be scared? If so, it was very poorly done, since I would never be scared of deaths" I feel nothing regarding seeing my loved ones this way, so my brain failed to scare me if that was the intention of making me see this.
"Urgh, how disgusting..." There are some tentacles in the distance writhing in a kinda gross way, this place is truly chaotic, I look at the sky seeing that there are thousands of eyes staring, it really is a nightmare in the general sense, but it’s not scary.
’Seriously, what’s the point of this?’ I look around at the chaos but there’s nothing relevant, it’s just uncomfortable, but overall it doesn’t bother me much, they say dreams and nightmares have symbolism, right? What does this sea of blood symbolize?
"P-P_p-PAndora-" A hand grabs me from the depths of the ocean of blood, grabbing my ankle while speaking my name, but I stomp, crushing that deformed thing’s face with my other foot.
"...Haaa... a nightmare when I already live in the abyss is just strange..." I start walking, looking forward, ignoring the ground and the sky that have nothing special about them.
"There must be some reason... after all, I wouldn’t have nightmares for no reason, right?" I decide to search and see what’s going on, maybe I missed something in the logic of the place.
...
...
...
"A-Azraelith-sama p-please help me!! S-She’s hurting me!" Baeh’Wa speaks to me while a sleeping Pandora is beating Baeh’Wa’s face, who has turned into a black puddle on the floor.
"You just stay quiet for a while!" I tell her, and she falls silent. I came to Pandora’s room when she was already asleep to test something. I used my magic to give her a nightmare, I was planning to do a test on her.
But she got up while sleeping and started hitting Baeh’Wa, who was beside me, probably because of Baeh’Wa’s scent, so Pandora is "defending" herself from an "enemy".
"T-This hurts..." Baeh’Wa murmurs while being lucky that Pandora isn’t using magic, considering Pandora’s current level, because if Pandora used magic, Baeh’Wa would die.
"Strange, Pandora is so defensive with her mind..." I was really curious about what was going on in Pandora’s head during this time, but just by being in the nightmare, Pandora’s body had already started to go into defense mode automatically.
Of course, I can’t literally see Pandora’s mind, but I wanted to see her talking in her sleep to understand a little more about her mentality.
"Aaahh!! S-She’s biting me!! A-Azraelith-sama please save me!!" Baeh’Wa starts crying while I roll my eyes at her incompetence in this regard. I approach, grabbing Pandora’s tail and pulling her off Baeh’Wa, who drags herself away.
"Baeh’Wa, just move away already" I say, throwing Pandora onto the bed while still holding her tail, which thrashes a little, but Pandora doesn’t attack me, so I guess her body, even unconscious, recognizes me.
"O-ok..."
"Ah, and Baeh’Wa, I have a question, is that ’thing’ still alive?" I ask about my mother’s divine beast, that thing was always kinda disturbing and uncomfortable to see.
"Yes, E-Echidna-sama’s divine beast is still alive, b-but I don’t know anything more about it, w-why isn’t it in the castle..."
"Alright then..." I hug Pandora, keeping her quiet on my lap so she doesn’t wander around the castle killing everything she sees, since she really seems intent on attacking.
"You can leave now, Baeh’Wa. I didn’t get the answers I wanted from Pandora" I wave to her, and she quickly leaves the room. Meanwhile, I wrap my tail around Pandora’s tail and hold her by the waist.
"Pandora... you’re so strong... it makes me jealous..." I’ve used this nightmare spell on myself before, and I woke up crying. This is a high-level spell that shows the worst of the worst scenarios to someone’s mind.
If used on a normal person, it would break that person’s mind, they wouldn’t even be able to distinguish that it’s just a nightmare, and the person would never wake up from it. But Pandora doesn’t show any reaction and will obviously wake up in a few hours.
"..." I squeeze Pandora tighter. Killing her would be so easy... if I killed her... only I would be left... but I quickly push those dark thoughts out of my head.
"I wonder why you love me... you’re a strange being..." I see that she is deeply immersed in her nightmare. I would really like to know what she’s thinking now, but since I can’t know, I decide to say things I wouldn’t say to her while she’s awake.
"You know, Pandora... I’ve thought a lot about what you said... about our mother, and about my attitudes towards her... and I think you were right" I’m not stupid, I’m very capable of thinking things through.
Pandora treats me as if I were less intelligent than her, which is an almost stupid mistake, after all, intellectually we have the same level of intelligence, only our personalities and ability to process information differ.
"Maybe you were more right than I’d like to admit, Pandora... our mother will never love me the way she loves you, and I know that. Deep down, I’ve always known" It was always obvious to me, I just always ignored that fact.
"No matter what I do, I could kill goddesses, free her, do everything for her, and even so, at most she would be satisfied with me, but love me? That’s impossible"
"Because my mother defined me as a failure since I was born, and that will never change, no matter what I do..." I bite Pandora’s neck deeply, tasting her blood while she lets out a little moan that is quite cute.
"..." Pandora’s body tenses and moves uncomfortably, but I keep her quiet on top of me, hugging her tightly enough that she can’t break free from me.
"You’re growing your power so fast, Pandora... it really makes my envy for you grow... it took me much longer than you to reach level 25 billion... you strive so hard for your goal"
"Our mother took a long time to trust me enough to help me grow... Pandora, was your childhood difficult?" I ask, knowing she won’t answer.
"My childhood was... horrible. The pressure to try to be the best as fast as possible made me never enjoy my life, and ever since I left that egg, I already felt that my mother didn’t love me the way I loved her"
"I... think I always knew, ever since I was born, that I had failed her... it’s the egg test. I found out much later when I came to the abyss. Our mother tests us even before we’re born to see if we are what she wants..."
"Isn’t it tragic? I lost before I even knew I had lost... effort, effort, and more effort, years of dedication and attempts... and everything I managed to accomplish for her, was totally ignored..." It’s not like I haven’t done anything.
I’ve done incredible things that no one but me had ever done, but for our mother, that doesn’t matter, and it never will.
"But I don’t hate our mother. I can’t hate her, despite the frustration I feel... Pandora, I wish I had been you..." I pour out all the envy I have for Pandora in this conversation.
"If I had had your talent, if I had been the one who was born already ’perfect’ for our mother... my life would have been so much better. Do you believe that in my entire life, I’ve never spent time having fun?"
"I never had a real break to do something fun, and the only times I had fun in my life were the times Lilith dragged me somewhere... Lilith was great... I can truly say she was my only real friend..."
"She was your friend too, wasn’t she, Pandora? Doesn’t that mean we have some similar tastes?..." The silence that fills the room after my question is uncomfortable.
"Of course you won’t answer... you’re not even listening...?" Pandora’s unconscious body grabs my hand and squeezes it. The gesture is so surprising it makes me smile.
"...Honestly... Pandora, I like you too... but I hope you’re having a horrible nightmare..." I say, squeezing her tighter in the hug while resting my chin on her shoulder, feeling her warmth and closing my eyes to comfort her in her nightmare.