Chapter 419 - Pretty Much

Chapter 419: Chapter 419 - Pretty Much

Zac came home a little after eleven, and Roxie heard his bag hit the floor outside the bedroom while she was still sitting against the headboard with her phone in her hand. Karen and Angela had ended the call almost an hour ago, but the conversation had stayed with her anyway.

Dylan had a crush on Zac.

Apparently Mason knew. Their other friends had probably known too. Karen had heard about it through drunk gossip, while Zac had somehow never mentioned any of it.

Roxie had spent the last hour telling herself it was old. Karen certainly treated it like old shit. Angela had turned it into a joke within seconds. Dylan had dated other people too, and recently there had been Anthony.

Still, Roxie wanted to hear it from Zac.

He appeared in the bedroom doorway looking exhausted, but his entire expression changed when he saw her sitting there wearing one of his shirts.

Roxie caught it immediately. "You look suspiciously awake all of a sudden."

Zac smiled as he walked toward the bed. "I came home, didn’t I?"

"That wasn’t what I said."

"I know what you said."

He climbed onto the mattress and leaned over her before she could ask anything else, but Roxie caught his shoulder. "Dylan first. Is he okay?"

"Yeah. His mom finally left, then his uncle stayed another twenty minutes because apparently the argument needed an encore. He’s pissed, but he’s okay."

"Good."

Zac looked at her for another second like he was waiting to see if there were more questions. When Roxie only nodded, he apparently decided his responsibilities for the night were complete because he kissed her.

Roxie kissed him back automatically.

His hand went around her waist and pulled her closer, and whatever exhaustion had followed him home disappeared fast. Zac kissed her like he had spent the entire drive remembering exactly what Dylan’s call interrupted earlier. Roxie laughed against his mouth when his hand slipped underneath the loose shirt and settled against her side.

"You really came home ready."

"I left ready."

"You went to deal with a family crisis."

"And suffered the entire time."

"You’re disgusting."

"I missed you."

That worked better than it should have.

Roxie wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him again. She had spent days waiting for an actual night with him instead of quick kisses before practice, half asleep cuddling or watching him answer team messages while eating whatever she put in front of him. Now he was finally home and clearly just as interested in making up for the interrupted night as she was.

His mouth moved along her jaw and down toward her neck while Roxie ran her fingers through his hair.

For a little while, her head finally shut up.

Then Karen’s voice returned.

Dylan had liked Zac for years.

Roxie tried pushing the thought away, but it only changed shape.

Did Zac know?

Her kiss slowed.

Zac noticed almost immediately. He pulled back just enough to look at her, his hair already messy from her hands and his mouth slightly swollen from kissing her.

"What happened?"

Roxie looked at him.

He looked genuinely confused and that helped a little.

"Nothing."

"That’s bullshit."

She sighed and kept one hand against his chest when he tried moving closer again. "Wait."

Zac stared at her. "You’re seriously stopping now?"

"Yes."

"This better be important."

Roxie almost laughed. "Did Dylan used to have a crush on you?"

Zac froze.

It only lasted a second, but Roxie felt it underneath her hand.

Then his eyebrows pulled together. "Who told you?"

"Karen."

"How the fuck does Karen know?"

"Mason."

Zac closed his eyes. "Jesus Christ."

"He was drunk."

"That makes more sense."

Roxie watched him carefully. "So it’s true."

Zac sat back against the headboard beside her and rubbed one hand over his face. There was a slight discomfort in him now that hadn’t been there before, and Roxie couldn’t immediately tell where it came from.

"Yeah. He liked me."

"When you were younger?"

"Yeah."

"For years?"

Zac glanced at her. "Apparently."

Roxie frowned. "Apparently?"

"I didn’t know."

That surprised her enough to make her forget the rest of the questions for a second.

"You seriously didn’t know?"

"No."

"But Mason knew."

"Apparently Mason, Kyle, probably half our fucking friends. Somehow nobody thought I needed that information."

Roxie stared at him before a laugh escaped her. "How did everybody know except you?"

"I don’t know, Roxie."

"You were literally the person he liked."

"Thank you. That detail hadn’t occurred to me."

She laughed harder, and Zac gave her an annoyed look, although some embarrassment had slipped into it too.

That reaction actually made Roxie feel better. He looked less like somebody caught hiding a secret and more like somebody who still couldn’t believe he’d been the last person to figure out a joke everybody else understood.

Her amusement faded when the next question came.

"So when did you find out?"

Zac looked at her.

That slight guilt appeared again.

"A few months ago."

Roxie went still. "When?"

He hesitated before answering, "End of January."

The uneasy feeling came back immediately. End of January. Did he mean when they were broken up?

Roxie shifted away from him slightly. "Dylan told you while we were broken up?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"It wasn’t planned."

"That wasn’t what I asked."

"I know." Zac rubbed the back of his neck before continuing. "I was staying around him a lot then. I was fucking miserable over you, he was listening to me bitch about everything and we’d been drinking one night. He said something weird, I started realizing what he meant, then eventually I asked him."

Roxie frowned.

"So you asked Dylan if he liked you?"

"Basically."

"And he said yes."

"Yeah."

There was something careful in the way Zac answered now. He wasn’t panicking or avoiding her eyes, but Roxie could tell he was choosing what to say.

"What exactly did he tell you?"

Zac stared toward the end of the bed for a moment. "That he’d had feelings for me for a long time."

Roxie’s stomach tightened.

"How long?"

"I didn’t ask."

"You didn’t?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I didn’t want to know."

That answer sounded strange enough that Roxie stared at him.

Zac noticed. "What?"

"Why wouldn’t you want to know?"

"Because what was I supposed to do with it? Start going through every year we’ve been friends wondering when Dylan was sitting there liking me and I had no fucking clue? I already felt like shit about enough things back then."

Roxie remembered exactly what those months had looked like.

Zac had been wrecked.

She had been wrecked too.

Maybe she understood that answer better than she wanted to.

"But he told you because we were broken up."

Zac’s expression shifted. "He told me because he was drunk and I pushed him to explain what he’d already accidentally said."

Roxie stayed quiet.

Zac leaned toward her slightly. "Rox, he wasn’t waiting outside my house for you to dump me so he could finally make some move."

"I didn’t say that."

"You’re thinking it."

"I’m thinking the timing is weird."

"I get why it looks weird now that you’re hearing it like this. It didn’t feel like that when it happened."

"How did it feel?"

"Awkward as fuck."

That pulled a tiny smile from her.

Zac continued, "He looked like he wanted to crawl through the floor. I didn’t know what the hell to say. We sat there being uncomfortable for a while, talked about it and eventually went back to being us."

Roxie watched him.

"Did he want something from you?"

Zac answered immediately. "Nothing was going to happen between us."

That wasn’t exactly what she asked.

Roxie noticed.

But Zac continued before she could push. "I made it clear I didn’t feel that way about him. Dylan knew that. There wasn’t some period where I was considering him or trying to figure out what I wanted. I wanted you. Unfortunately for everybody around me, I spent most of that breakup talking about you."

Roxie’s mouth twitched.

"Unfortunately?"

"You should’ve heard me."

The tightness inside her eased slightly, although the timing still sat wrong.

"What happened after?"

"Nothing. We stayed friends."

"And his boyfriend? The one on the photo?"

"He came later. Recently. About a month ago."

"So Dylan told you about liking you, then later he started dating Anthony."

"Yeah."

"Anthony’s the guy from the picture?"

"Yeah. They were actually together. Anthony posted pictures of them on his social media, and eventually somebody from Dylan’s family found one and started sending it around. That’s how all this shit blew up."

Roxie nodded slowly.

Anthony did make it feel smaller.

Whatever Dylan had admitted months ago, afterward he had met someone else, dated him and publicly existed as part of a couple before his family found out.

Still, she couldn’t quite stop herself.

"You never told me."

Zac went quiet.

This time Roxie knew the guilt on his face had nothing to do with Dylan liking him.

"I know."

"You thought about telling me?"

"Yeah."

That surprised her.

"And you didn’t."

Zac sighed. "Because he told me something personal while we weren’t together. At that point you didn’t even know he was bi. If I came back after we got together and said, hey, by the way, Dylan admitted he liked me, how exactly was I supposed to explain the rest without outing him?"

"You could’ve told me after Dylan told me himself."

"Yeah."

The answer came without an excuse.

Roxie looked at him.

Zac rubbed the back of his neck again. "I probably should’ve."

"Probably?"

"I should’ve."

That made her feel better than some perfect defense would have.

"Why didn’t you?"

"Honestly?" Zac looked at her. "I stopped thinking about it. It happened months ago, nothing changed between us afterward, then Anthony came along. By the time Dylan told you about being bi, I wasn’t sitting there thinking about one horrible conversation we had in a basement while I was still losing my mind over you."

Roxie studied his face.

He looked guilty for keeping something from her.

He did not look guilty about Dylan.

There was a difference.

"And you’re sure it was old?"

Zac paused just long enough for Roxie to notice.

"He’d liked me for years," he said. "That’s what he told me. Whatever feelings were there, I made it clear nothing was happening. Then later he started dating Anthony. I figured that was done."

That answer wasn’t perfect.

Roxie knew it wasn’t.

Zac had said I figured, instead of telling her exactly what Dylan felt now.

But something about that made her trust the answer more.

At least he wasn’t pretending he could crawl inside Dylan’s head.

Roxie looked down at her hands. "I still think it’s weird he told you while we were broken up."

"I know."

"You keep saying that."

"Because I understand why you’re stuck on it. I just don’t think it meant what you’re thinking."

Roxie looked at him again.

"And what am I thinking?"

"That he saw you were gone and thought it was his chance."

The fact Zac said it so easily made Roxie uncomfortable because, apparently, he knew exactly where her head had gone.

"Did he?"

"No."

The answer came quickly.

Roxie held his eyes.

Zac didn’t look away.

"He wasn’t trying to get with me, Rox. He was embarrassed as hell that I knew. I was the idiot who kept asking questions because I needed to understand what he’d said."

That was enough to make the picture in Roxie’s head shift.

Instead of Dylan sitting there waiting for his opportunity, she pictured something much more awkward. Zac confused, Dylan regretting whatever had slipped out, both of them stuck in a conversation neither knew how to handle.

That felt more believable.

Then another memory returned.

Roxie narrowed her eyes. "You’re still a hypocrite."

Zac blinked at her. "About what?"

"Ethan."

Zac groaned. "Ethan."

"Yes, Ethan."

Zac continued before she could comment. "I was jealous. I never claimed I was rational about Ethan."

Roxie crossed her arms. "You got pissed because he slept on my couch, but apparently your best friend had actual feelings for you and you never thought I should know."

"Years ago."

"You literally just told me you don’t know exactly when it stopped."

Zac opened his mouth.

Then closed it.

Roxie’s eyebrows rose.

"Interesting."

"Fuck."

She laughed.

Zac rubbed his face again. "Fine. I walked into that."

"You really did."

"But nothing happened."

"I know."

"Nothing was ever going to happen."

"I know."

"I don’t like him that way."

Roxie’s smile softened. "I know, Zac."

And she did.

That was the easiest part of this entire conversation.

There was nothing in Zac’s face when he talked about Dylan that made Roxie think there was some secret confusion on his side. If anything, the possibility seemed almost ridiculous to him.

The uncertainty belonged somewhere else.

She rested her head against the headboard and stared toward the ceiling. "Maybe I’m making it bigger because Karen dropped it on me out of nowhere."

"Probably."

Roxie turned her head slowly.

Zac started laughing.

"You’re such an asshole."

"You said it first."

"You’re supposed to tell me I’m being completely reasonable."

"You stopped me in the middle of making out to interrogate me about Dylan."

"I asked questions."

"You asked enough questions that I forgot where my hands were."

Roxie laughed despite herself. "Poor you."

"Yes. Thank you."

Zac moved closer again, but this time he waited before touching her.

Roxie looked at him for another moment.

"So you’re telling me Dylan had a crush on you for years, finally told you while we were broken up, you rejected him, nothing happened, he later dated Anthony and you basically stopped thinking about it."

Zac nodded. "That’s pretty much it."

Pretty much.

Roxie caught that too.

But maybe every conversation didn’t need every ugly detail.

Zac had told her enough to understand what happened.

More importantly, he hadn’t tried convincing her Dylan had never felt anything. He hadn’t claimed to know exactly what was inside Dylan’s head. He simply seemed certain that whatever happened in that basement never changed what existed between them afterward.

Roxie could believe that.

She could also understand why Zac hadn’t wanted to tell her something that would have exposed Dylan before Dylan was ready.

The timing still bothered her.

Maybe it would bother her tomorrow too.

But looking at Zac now, she couldn’t find anything in him that told her she needed to be afraid of their friendship.

Zac touched her knee. "Can we please stop talking about Dylan in bed?"

Roxie smiled. "You really are horny."

"I’ve been cock blocked twice in one night."

"He called me the cock blocked one."

"We both suffered."

"Tragic."

"Exactly."

Roxie laughed when he moved closer. This time she let him put his hand around her waist.

Before he kissed her, she caught his chin. "If I ever find out Mason knows another secret about my relationship before I do, I’m killing all of you."

"Fair."

"And next time you get jealous over Ethan, I’m bringing this up."

"That’s less fair."

"Too bad."

Zac smiled and kissed her.

Roxie kissed him back, letting herself relax when his arm tightened around her.

She trusted Zac.

She trusted what he had told her about that conversation.

She even believed him when he said nothing had changed between him and Dylan afterward.

Still, one part remained tucked quietly in the back of her head.