The Academy’s Doomed Young Lord Dies Ten Thousand Times
Chapter 204 : Chapter 204
Chapter 204 : Eyes Opened (2)
It was not my imagination.
Regina was staring at me fixedly. More specifically, at my face.
But once I accepted that reality, one question inevitably remained.
‘Why?’
Was there a reason for her to stare at me so intently?
It was not as though I was a pleasant sight to look at. Why was she staring so persistently?
It was probably not for a positive reason. What sensible person would take pleasure in a face steeped in fatigue and anguish, one that had not even slept properly?
Normally, one would want to avoid looking at this face if possible. It had always been gloomy, but it was now even more haggard.
Yet she was staring at me.
Why, really?
‘Concern?’
Even Regina, with that twisted personality of hers, had spent quite some time with me. Had some sense of comradeship built up between us?
Come to think of it, I was a fairly important weapon to the Princess’s Faction, so it would not be strange for her to worry…….
“Hehe.”
“…….”
No, that was not the face of someone who was concerned, no matter how I looked at it.
From what I had seen so far, that brightly smiling expression…… was not a facade. It appeared when she was genuinely in a good mood.
‘But why, really?’
She was in a good mood?
Why on earth would she be happy to see someone whose face looked as though he was dying?
‘Was she really that twisted?’
I knew she had a bad personality…… but I had not known she was such an eccentric.
If that was impressive, then it was impressive.
In any case, our reunion and the report ended with that question still lingering.
It had become quite late, and now that I had said everything I needed to say, it was time to leave.
“……Then I will take my leave.”
As I was about to depart with the customary farewell.
“Ah, Young Master. One thing before you go.”
“Yes?”
Regina unusually stopped me and smiled brightly.
Then. After a brief silence, as though she were considering something.
“……Today of all days, I like your face.”
She said that as though it were nothing.
…….
I even had no choice but to freeze on the spot.
This face?
The face that had made Khan widen his eyes in shock the moment he saw me? The face of a walking corpse on the verge of death?
When I sent a look toward Aisa, who had been standing beside us.
“…….”
Even Aisa, who did not normally reveal her emotions easily, was looking at the Princess with cold sweat on her brow, as though she were flustered.
“Pardon……?”
……What could she possibly be thinking? What could her intention be?
Was this also the Art of Using People? A stratagem for some practical gain?
‘That does not seem right…….’
Ah.
I did not know.
She was still someone whose inner thoughts I could not understand.
Thus, after the boy with the gloomy—and now even more haggard—impression left, the garden was wrapped in silence.
Its owner, Princess Regina, was simply savoring the fragrance of tea in silence.
-TAP, TAP, TAP.
Even afterward, the Princess seemed to be lost in thought, doing nothing but repeatedly tapping the table with her index finger.
“…….”
Aisa, the Guard Knight who protected the Princess’s side, could barely conceal her confusion.
After all, that earlier remark…….
-“Today of all days, I like your face.”
Rain Enlight’s condition had not looked good at a glance.
No, even saying that he did not look good was optimistic. His complexion was truly close to that of a corpse.
And yet she said that she liked his face.
Was that not conduct and language unlike the Princess, who had mastered the Art of Using People, conduct that could be viewed as rude in some ways?
The impact of that one remark, delivered with such a bright smile, was beyond imagination.
‘Your Highness…… What could your intention possibly be……?’
Aisa struggled to calm herself and considered several scenarios.
Even so, no satisfactory answer emerged.
What was the Princess truly thinking? With what intention had she said that?
The cool-headed Princess, who excelled at schemes, surely had some objective.
Perhaps she wanted to take the upper hand in their relationship?
To establish the hierarchy by showing that he had to endure even such rudeness?
It was forced, but it was the most reasonable conclusion she could reach.
However,
‘……I thought that Her Highness at least held the Young Master in special regard.’
Aisa had vaguely guessed what Rain Enlight meant to the Princess.
The world of dark plots and political strife that Regina had been forced to enter after barely beginning to speak, before she had even fully matured.
The inborn disadvantage of having far weaker power than the Crown Prince, and the need to somehow make the situation evenly matched.
In the course of that life, Regina had needed to acquire a particular way of living.
A way of life where she had to use everything she possessed, and even what she did not possess.
The Art of Using People was, in other words, a technique for using people.
It was a skill she had been forced to master in order to survive. Regina had possessed unmatched talent for it, and through that ability, she had somehow expanded her faction enough to contend with ‘that’ Crown Prince.
Even so, there was something she had clearly lost.
‘The happiness a child of that age ought to enjoy.’
Siblings, friends, lovers. The values one could gain through exchanging emotions in trust with precious people.
Those were not things permitted in the Princess’s life.
Opening one’s heart meant revealing one’s weakness.
She hid her own intentions and weaknesses while making only the other party open their heart. Then she used them.
It was something she had to do, but Aisa knew that a life lived that way could not possibly be happy.
Though it was a mission, when one spent a long time protecting someone’s side, one inevitably came to wish for that person’s happiness.
Even if, to that person, one was not precious, but merely a tool that could be used at any time.
Even if even thinking that way was part of the Princess’s intention.
That was why Aisa had watched the Princess’s reactions, and why she had been able to tell that, at least when Regina dealt with Rain Enlight, her characteristic smile held a different meaning.
Normally, once a pleasant conversation was over and the eyes watching her were gone, the smile on Regina’s lips would cool into a cold, expressionless face…….
Yet after speaking with the boy with the gloomy impression, had she not kept a faint smile on her lips, as though she were happily replaying the conversation?
Every time, after talking with him.
That was why Aisa had sometimes hoped that, through Rain Enlight, the Princess might come to understand ordinary happiness.
There was a problem with her birth, but the era was changing.
‘……But was I mistaken?’
Aisa could not understand what the earlier response had meant.
Had it been some kind of Art of Using People?
Had the Princess not treated even him sincerely?
Did Regina truly open her heart to no one?
Had it truly been a mistake to think that she had touched, even slightly, the happiness a child of her age should enjoy, or the warm feelings one could hold toward another person?
“Aisa.”
As those thoughts continued, the Princess’s voice broke the silence.
“Yes, Your Highness.”
Though she had been lost in deep thought, Aisa’s answer was not delayed.
“This is about Young Master Enlightenment…….”
“Please, say whatever you wish.”
After that immediate response, Regina began to speak about the very topic the Guard Knight had been considering.
“Did he not look handsome today of all days?”
?
‘??’
“???”
Had she heard that incorrectly?
For a moment, Aisa had no choice but to doubt her own ears.
“Aisa?”
“……Ah, excuse me. For a moment, my ears…….”
“Hehe, it is all right. I only meant that the Young Master’s appearance was quite to my liking today.”
She had not heard incorrectly.
She had not.
Why had she not?
Aisa could only think that she wished she had heard incorrectly.
“Is that…… so…….”
‘How am I supposed to interpret that?’
……A peculiar taste?
“Um…… He did look quite fatigued.”
Quite fatigued.
Even those words were an enormous embellishment of how terrible Rain’s condition had been.
He had looked so frail that it would not have been strange for him to collapse at any moment, like someone who could not die and wandered this world instead.
Aisa remembered that appearance vividly, and Regina could not have failed to notice it either.
“It is about that…….”
Resting her chin on her hand, Regina began to speak with a serious expression, as though she were discussing a matter related to political strife.
“Do you not agree that the Young Master is most handsome when he looks tired and suffering?”
Aisa suppressed the desire to smack her own forehead with superhuman patience.
“…….”
She could roughly understand what the Princess meant.
The boy’s gloomy and haggard atmosphere and appearance might make people feel uncomfortable at first glance, but there was a certain charm in it that drew people in.
To put it bluntly, he was handsome, so even that atmosphere could become attractive.
But, but…….
No matter how generously she thought about it, this was…… a taste beyond ordinary bounds……!
‘She was not someone who talked about things like this…….’
This topic was clearly…… something embarrassing.
Even setting aside the fact that it concerned the opposite sex, Regina’s reason should have been enough for her to understand that this preference was unusual.
And yet, as though there were nothing strange about it, Regina was calmly going on about that ‘peculiar taste.’
“……Hehe.”
There was even the sight of her smiling happily, perhaps as she recalled that appearance.
Perhaps she had developed a taste for something strange. The Knight could only worry.
‘……My thoughts had been wrong.’
Aisa realized it.
It was not that the Princess did not hold Rain Enlight in special regard.
On the contrary, because he was the first person she had ever come to hold in special regard…… her distorted sensibilities had, regrettably, begun to work in a strange direction.
“……Your Highness, um…….”
After worrying for a moment, the Guard Knight slowly spoke.
“Hm? It is rare for Aisa to bring something up first. Please, speak freely.”
Regina generally excelled in every field, so there was usually no need to offer her counsel.
But as the Knight who served her master…… she had to say this much.
Her sense of duty finally led her to offer advice to the Princess, who appeared to be smiling just as usual.
“……Would it not have been proper to first show that you were worried?”
Aisa trusted that Regina was not someone who would fail to understand once the issue had been brought to the surface.
“…….”
Fortunately, or perhaps sadly, that trust proved correct.
“……Ah…….”
At those words, Regina let out a sound as though the air had left her, her expression blank.
It was a loose reaction she had never shown even once before.
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