Tales of Herding Gods

Qin Mu looked toward the source of the sound and saw a tall and sturdy man with a shirt draped over his shoulders. He seemed slightly lazy, and the shirt on his body was also slightly loose. Yet it gave him a certain kind of aura.

“So it’s Human Emperor Qi Kang,” God Chi Xiu said. “I’m acting on orders. Human Emperor Qin used a Youdu spell to snatch back people, and even King Yama was alarmed. The hearts of the ghosts in Fengdu are anxious that they will be summoned to Youdu and sink there eternally. Because of that, King Yama wants to take him down. It’s not my fault.”

Human Emperor Qi Kang took hold of the shirt draped over his shoulders and smiled. “I know that you are acting on orders so I won’t create trouble for you. I will be bringing Human Emperor Qin away, just drop King Yama a note.”

God Chi Xiu shook his head and said, “That will not do. King Yama still wants to punish him alone later, so I can’t let you take him away…”

At this moment, an old voice suddenly rang out. “Chi Xiu, I heard my disciple’s grand-disciple has been captured by you?”

God Chi Xiu’s expression changed slightly when he saw an elder with white hair walking over. It was none other than the master of Human Emperor Qi Kang. He immediately explained, “So it’s Human Emperor Yi Shan. I can’t make a decision regarding Human Emperor Qin’s matter, since it’s King Yama that wants to punish him for creating a disturbance in Fengdu. I can’t call the shots. Human Emperor Yi Shan, please don’t blame me.”

“I didn’t see how big the matter was.” The white-haired elder had a short stature, and his snow-white beard flew upwards from both sides. His voice was like a great bell as he laughed. “I know you can’t make the decision so I’m not letting you make the decision. I’m the one making the decision. I’ll be bringing Human Emperor Qin away!”

“You can’t!” God Chi Xiu became anxious and said, “King Yama wants to punish him personally. Human Emperor Yi Shan, you can’t make the decision…”

“Chi Xiu, I’ve heard my grand-disciple’s grand-disciple has been captured by you?”

Another voice came over, and God Chi Xiu couldn’t help crying out internally for help. He saw a woman in a blue dress carrying a small bamboo basket walking over. He immediately said, “So it’s Human Emperor Lan Po. About this…”

“Chi Xiu, I’ve heard my grand-disciple’s grand-disciple’s disciple has been captured by you?”

“Chi Xiu, I’ve heard my grand-disciple…”

Chi Xiu!”

…

More and more people surrounded God Chi Xiu who was about to explode. He thought to himself, ‘Could I have poked a hornet’s nest? These human emperors of Hall of Human Emperors are all hornets, right? You usually don’t see them around, but once you poke one, the whole nest comes flying out!”

He felt he couldn’t provoke them and when more and more damned human emperors came over, he could only say, “Everyone, you are all reputable figures so why must you force me? Please don’t give me trouble. I can pass Human Emperor Qin to you guys first, but he cannot leave Fengdu. I have to hand him over to King Yama…”

“Don’t worry, don’t worry, we won’t make you trouble!” everyone said noisily.

Qin Mu looked around in a daze and stuttered, “God Chi Xiu, you said I had people above…”

“That’s right!” Chi Xiu tried his best to squeeze out from the crowd while saying angrily, “The human emperors of your Hall of Human Emperors are all bullies and ruffians, and they are a force in my Fengdu that cannot be provoked! One poke and the entire hornet’s nest will come out. I’ll come back for you later!”

He squeezed out of the crowd and flapped his wings away.

Qin Mu looked at the human emperors in the surroundings, slightly at a loss. Everyone was smiling as they examined him. Among them, there were men and women, young and old, tall and short, fat and skinny, well-groomed ones, fierce-looking ones, courageous and strong ones, and also weak-looking ones.

Qin Mu looked toward the crowd, but Village Chief couldn’t be seen. He immediately coughed and greeted, “Young and superficial student Qin Mu, the current human emperor, pays his respects to grand-master, great grand-master, great great grand master, great great great grand master…”

“There no need for such formalities!”

Everyone flooded forward and surrounded him, this little skeleton, in the center, rattling his bones until they were almost falling apart. They gathered around him and walked him toward the city with smiles. “It’s rare to have a living coming to find us so let’s have a nice gathering and liven things up!”

“You haven’t been burning paper money for us. If it wasn’t for that little brat with the surname Su dying and coming to Fengdu, we would have thought that Hall of Human Emperors has been cut short!”

“Why didn’t you sweep our tombs? If you had gone, we would have known that we have a successor. We even left some treasures for you in Hall of Human Emperors.”

…

There were too many questions so Qin Mu could only reply honestly. “Until now, I have yet to visit the Hall of Human Emperors. Village Chief also didn’t tell me where it is…”

Human Emperor Qi Kang couldn’t help becoming furious. “What was that little brat doing? To actually not bring you to Hall of Human Emperors! This scoundrel, when he comes back, I’ll definitely teach him a lesson!”

Human Emperor Yi Shan gave a fierce kick to Human Emperor Qi Kang’s buttocks and blew his beard while giving him a stare before shouting, “How do you teach your disciple? Beating your disciple is never the way to teach a good disciple! It’s because of teachings from people like you that Human Emperor Qin didn’t sweep our tombs!”

After this kick from Human Emperor Yi Shan, his head was immediately punched by Human Emperor Lan Po, and he cradled it in pain. Human Emperor Lan Po said furiously. “Yi Shan, did I teach you like this? How dare you even have the face to say that to Qi Kang ‘how did you teach your disciple’?”

“Lan Po, such a violent girl, throwing my face!”

“Kong Xian, how dare you beat my grand-disciple? You are tired of living!”

…

A bunch of old fellows started to fight in the city, and they couldn’t be broken apart. Qin Mu immediately saw one strange point in that. The past human emperors would help their grand-disciple to beat their disciple.

It seemed that every disciple wasn’t friendly with their own master.

However, the abilities of the past human emperors were indeed all astonishing. Literally, everyone was an existence that had cultivated to the realm of path. Yet what was weird was that they all had their own specialties. The abilities that the disciples and their masters were skilled in were different. Human Emperor Qi Kang was Village Chief’s master, and Village Chief was most proficient in sword skills. He was known as Sword God yet Human Emperor Qi Kang was proficient in fists skills and mudra skills.

They were strong and overbearing. His mudra techniques were even more terrifying than the fist skills of Great Thunderclap Monastery.

Yet his master was Human Emperor Yi Shan who was skilled in divine arts. His master, Human Emperor Lan Po, was skilled in spirit weapons. As for Human Emperor Kong Xian, he was skilled in the divine arts of spells with words.

It seemed as if all of them hated their masters very much and had vowed not to take their path, stubbornly wanting to open up a path of their own.

Qin Mu blinked and looked around. The human emperors that were messing around had razed down a few streets in a few breaths’ time. Only after a few halls were destroyed and countless houses were torn down did they stop fighting.

The gods and devils in the city kept quiet out of fear, none of them daring to make a sound. They had all stopped what they were doing to look.

Some of their halls were destroyed, but they didn’t say anything. They could only grieve internally as numerous imps came forward to help repair the halls.

‘God Chi Xiu said that our Hall of Human Emperor is a force in Fengdu, looks like he was right,’ Qin Mu thought to himself. ‘The past human emperors tore down a few streets yet no one dares to get involved with them. Village Chief must have been living in bliss here, able to walk unhindered. He could even be said to be the little overlord of Fengdu. Still, where did he disappear to?’

Human Emperor Qi Kang’s face was all bruised when he climbed out from under Human Emperor Yi Shan’s legs. He wiped away the blood from his nose and said with a smile, “You must go to Hall of Human Emperors. All of the past human emperors have left their ultimate arts there, hoping someone in the future generation will break through and walk their path. Besides, you have to sweep the tombs, and on every New Year and other festivities, you need to burn some good offerings for us.”

Yi Shan chuckled. “You can burn some enemies for us to play. This Fengdu is good in everything, except having things to play around. We’re before First Ancestor’s Sacred Hall of Five Yang, so let’s go there!”

“First Ancestor?”

Qin Mu’s heart shook slightly. First Ancestor was the first human emperor, a true god who had opened the inheritance of Hall of Human emperors. He had remarkable abilities, and Qin Mu wanted to meet this distinguished person of the past very much!

He had seen the stone statue of the first human emperor in Little Jade Capital, and Hermit Qing You had said that First Ancestor Human Emperor had become a stone statue under utter despair. After Qin Mu had never expected to be able to meet him.

“First Ancestor has left Fengdu for quite a period of time. He said he was going to attend to something very important. Your master went to find him, but he still hasn’t returned. Your master is very weird. He doesn’t seem to have stopped breathing completely, so he can walk out of Fengdu. On the other hand, we have really stopped breathing,” Qi Kang said.

Everyone flooded forward and made the two huge beasts that were guarding Sacred Hall of Five Yang jump in shock. The human-faced beast with a bird’s body on the left hurriedly asked, “Human emperors, are you coming to old master’s house to look for food again? The place has been eaten almost clean by you guys, so why don’t you go to Second Ancestor’s house?”

“Shut up!” the old human emperors shouted in unison. “Second Ancestor’s house has been eaten clean, and the same goes for Third Ancestor’s house! Among all of our past human emperors, only your house still has something left!”

The human-faced bird immediately shut its mouth and pretended not to see anything, letting them barge in.

Qin Mu had the dragon qilin and taotie stay out of the hall. “Stay here, I’ll go in and have a talk with the ancestors.”

The dragon qilin did as told and examined the two huge beasts. He suddenly asked, “Have you guys seen Heavenly Saint Cult’s Patriarch? He looks like a youth and is very handsome.”

The human-faced bird was easier to talk to and said, “Heavenly Saint Cult’s Patriarch? You should go to the nest of Heavenly Saint Cult. All the past cult master stay there, but they are mostly devils and look fiendish; they are not to be provoked.”

The dragon qilin was delighted upon hearing his words and hurriedly asked, “May I ask brothers to show me the way.”

In Hall of Five Yang, Qin Mu couldn’t help sighing ruefully. The human emperors were truly like bandits entering the village, never treating themselves like outsiders. Before they even got seated, Human Emperor Lan Po summoned some imps over and instructed them. “Human Emperor Qin from the world of the living is here, so quickly prepare some good dishes to receive him!”

One of the green-skinned imps braved himself to say, “Old masters, a living person can’t eat the food of Fengdu. Look, Human Emperor Qin is a skeleton without flesh, blood, or intestines; he can’t eat.”

“Pesky! Of course, he’s not the one eating, and we are the ones eating! I’m the disciple of First Ancestor, can I not eat? Go prepare, quickly!” Second Ancestor Human Emperor shouted.

Numerous green-faced imps with fangs scuttled around and prepared the dishes. Qin Mu examined them and was puzzled. They were quite similar to the ghost kings in Hall of King Qin, creatures that weren’t life forms from the world of the living. Could they be life forms from Youdu?

“No one has been sending offerings to us over these years, so we are becoming hungry ghosts! Raise the seats!”

Second Ancestor used his mudra skills, and instantly lotuses bloomed inside the Sacred Hall of Five Yang. They grew taller and larger, lifting them up.

Numerous imps were done with the dishes and carried them up. The past human emperors didn’t care about their looks as they ate and drank gluttonously, sweeping everything clean. Only then were they satisfied.

Qin Mu stared at the sight with wide eyes. The past human emperors looked like they had starved for a few hundred years. Where was any sort of loftiness left?

The food in front of him was untouched because he was only a skeleton and couldn’t eat anything.

“If Human Emperor Qin had not come forward, I still couldn’t have had a full meal. Your master must have hated me very much, so he had never gone tomb sweeping, starving me for a few hundred years.”

Human Emperor Qi Kang sighed and looked at Qin Mu. “Little Brat Su praised you to the heavens, saying his disciple has much better future prospects than my disciple. Let me see how is his disciple much better than my disciple?”

Qin Mu didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. ‘Isn’t Grand Master Qi Kang’s disciple Village Chief?’

The other human emperors were also instantly excited. They all said, “Old rules, let’s fight first!”

Qin Mu rose and bowed around him. “Grand-masters, ancestors, I’m only on Seven Stars Realm, I think we can forgo the fight?”

Qi Kang smiled and said, “Don’t worry, we won’t bully you. Of course, we will be fighting with you on the same realm. We won’t hurt you as well, since we just want to see your cultivation and give pointers.”

Qin Mu’s expression became troubled. “In that case, there’s no need to compete. I don’t want to bully grand-masters and ancestors. Hurting you guys isn’t good. Truth be told, your techniques and divine arts are all mostly behind times…”

The surroundings went silent.

“I suddenly feel like beating this rascal to death…” Human Emperor Yi Shan muttered softly.