133 Choose your death, not your destiny
Hearing her words, Fu Chen was left in deep thoughts. For a long time, he couldn’t prove what exactly was right and what was wrong. He felt like no matter what he chose, everything will turn out for the worst.
He might reap some benefits but he will also lose something. Xue Pun literally had no relationship with him but he saved him even if it was just to save his sister.
It was something that he couldn’t just overlook. He lost two people due to his recklessness. He got injured severely. He put his brothers’ life at risk once again.
He had received a lot of benefits but now he couldn’t even think of those. He was just drowning.
Inside his mind, Ysla sat down and put her arms around her legs as she covered herself with those legs. She was also sad. She thought she could at least cheer him up but at this moment, no matter how much she said, she couldn’t cheer him up.
“Why did you get so quiet? Is it the end already?” Suddenly, a voice rang in his head. This voice was so similar that for a moment, Fu Chen couldn’t believe he was wearing it.
He raised his head and saw Su Ling in front of her. She hadn’t changed even a little. She still looked four feet tall and extremely cute. But, there was one problem.
She was like a soul, a phantom that could be phased through.
“L-l-l-Ling, howwww?” Fu Chen’s expression drastically changed when he saw her. Suddenly, anger appeared on his face as he shouted.
“Ysla, what the hell are you doing?”
But he didn’t get any response. Just when he was about to shout once more, Su Ling put her finger on his lips.
“She can’t hear us.”
At this moment, Fu Chen just blankly stared at her. He didn’t know whether he was hallucinating or not.
“Aww! I came to see you from so far away and you won’t even smile for me. Did you already forget about me?” Su Ling pouted as she showed her teary face.
“No-no- how can I forget about you?” Fu Chen cried out as he tried to hold her. His hands did touch her as he wrapped his arms around her and burst into tears.
“How can I forget about you? Sob! Sob!”
“Don’t cry! Didn’t your promise a long time ago that you wouldn’t cry? You are not allowed to cry or else I will cry.” Su Ling pouted as she wiped away his tears.
“Yes! Sob! I won’t cry.” Fu Chen slowly controlled his tears as he nodded his head.
“Good! Now, tell me why are you so sad?” Su Ling smiled and sat next to him.
Hearing her questions, Fu Chen slowly looked above and spoke.
“I feel like I deserve to die. When I was small, my parents gave up everything for me. Even though I had no chance to cultivate. When I grow up, you gave up your life for me even though I wasn’t worth it.”
“And now, a couple, a husband and wife gave up their lives for me. Why do I deserve those sacrifices? I am nothing but worthless trash who just does reckless things without even considering others’ feelings.”
“When I asked Chu Yan and Wu Kong to join me, I never considered their feelings. I just wanted to use them. But what did they do for me? They put their lives on the line for my benefit. They almost die for my life.”
“What did I deserve to get this? I have something very strong and mysterious thing inside me. It could easily help me get stronger but why do I always keep on working hard?”
“No matter how hard I work, people won’t care. If I offend someone, they will take it out on my family. So, what’s the point of cultivation? What’s the point of getting stronger if you are just going to lose?”
“Su Ling! I don’t want this. I don’t want to be left alone. I don’t want to be at the peak all by myself while everyone who was closer to me sacrificed to help me get there.”
“Sob! Sob! I don’t want that life. All I can see right now is my dream crumbling in front of me. The dream that pushed me to work hard is no longer helping me.”
“What should I do, Ling? I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to cultivate to be left alone.”
Fu Chen couldn’t contain his tears when he said that. He just continued to cry.
At this moment, Su Ling slowly stand up and walked in front of him. Feeling her shadow, he slowly raised his head and saw her raising her hand toward the sky.
“Chen, when I was somewhere far, I met a strange old man. He was talking with somebody whom I didn’t see. He asked ‘Why should I cultivate?’. At that moment, do you know what that mysterious person replied?”
Su Ling turned around and asked.
Fu Chen stared at her with a blank expression.
“Cultivation makes everything possible.”
When he heard those words, he suddenly felt a strange rope binding around his waist.
“Cultivation is the source of everything, creation, destruction, dao, laws, everything comes from the cultivation. You can’t do anything but you can still cultivate.”
“Your willpower won’t accomplish your dreams. Only your cultivation can. Chen, you promised me that you won’t fall into darkness. You promised that you will accomplish our dream.”
“You don’t have to be afraid of being reckless. You don’t have to be afraid of losing anyone. Because with cultivation, anything and everything is possible. You just need to cultivate.”
“And, if you still don’t want others to die.”
Suddenly, Su Ling raised her hand and pointed at him.
“Then, die before them. You can’t choose your destiny or fate. You can’t see your future or change your past. But, you can choose how you would die.”
“Chen! I chose to die for you. You should also choose how you want to die. Whether you want to die at the peak of the world or do you want to die at the bottom.”
“Whether you want to die with honor or do you want to die as a disgrace. Chen! I didn’t have the luxury of time to choose how I want to die but I die with no regrets.”
“You have regrets, a lot of regrets. This is not the moment to die. This is not your time to die. This is not where you should stop. Stand up and continue to forge your path.”
“You, the sword cultivator should know that a man can never bend his knees to others. You are a man. You are the husband of three women. You are the brother of two monster beasts. And, you are the son of your parents.”
“You are Fu Chen, the man whom I love and with whom I share my dream. You must choose your death. When will you choose and what kind of death you will choose depends upon you.”
“Live to cultivate, die to cultivate. Life and Death are at the hands of cultivators. Chen! Don’t give up on your dream! Don’t lose faith! No matter how many times you make a mistake, keep forging ahead.”
“There will be a day when you can finally accomplish your dream and choose your life and death.”
Su Ling slowly walked toward him and her hands covered his face. She slightly bowed down and kissed his lips. As she kissed him, her body slowly disintegrates.
Fu Chen tried to catch her but she disintegrates in his hands. At this moment, Fu Chen suddenly realizes that he was back to normal.
“Host! Host! Host! Host!”
Ysla was continuously shouting inside his mind.
“I’m alright. I’m alright. You can calm down.” Fu Chen instantly replied.
Only then Ysla calmed down.
“Sorry for making you worry!” Fu Chen slowly stood up. At this moment, he raised his hand toward the sunset and clenched his fist.
“I’ve chosen how I should die. And, this is not how I want to die. I, Fu Chen will accomplish my dream. I will stand at the peak of the world. And, I won’t be alone.”
Slowly, a big smile appeared on his face as he put down his hand. He raised his head and saw some stars shining in the sky. At this moment, Su Ling’s face appeared among those stars.
‘Thank you, Su Ling! Thank you, Ysla! This is not the time to give up. I still need to move on.’
“Thank god, you realized it. By the way, what happened to you? Why were you so silent for so long?” Ysla asked.
“Some people do not want me to give up right now and made me realize why. And, you are one of them. Thank you, Ysla.” Fu Chen smiled as he spoke.
Ysla was silent for a long time. After a while, she finally spoke.
“Host, don’t make me worried like that.”
“I won’t.”
Fu Chen clenched his fist and a strong determination appeared in his eyes.
“I will never make anyone worried about me except for my enemies.”