Chapter 706

"We should have a few drinks later."

The group was making their way toward the Golden Palace when Sif suddenly addressed Evenson with the suggestion.

"Huh? No. Absolutely not."

Evenson froze.

Then the color drained from his face, and he shook his head so vigorously it was almost impressive. There was no chance in the Nine Realms that he was accepting an invitation to drink with Sif.

"I need to discuss something with you." Sif glanced toward Thor and Jane, who were walking ahead with their arms linked. The sight seemed to weigh on her, and she sighed. "The people I’m closest to are all painfully straightforward. If I confide in them about something, the entire realm will know by the next morning. And I don’t want to trouble anyone else with this. So it really has to be you."

"If there’s something you need to talk about, we can talk." Evenson reluctantly agreed to that much. "But let’s skip the drinking."

He wasn’t completely incapable of holding his liquor. Against ordinary humans, he could even put up a respectable showing.

Asgardians were another matter entirely.

Drinking with an Asgardian was less a social activity and more a long-term commitment to organ failure.

And his current tolerance had been trained into him by Sif herself.

Back when Sif had been stranded on Earth, SHIELD’s personnel assigned to look after her had learned that lesson the hard way. At least half of them had reportedly developed liver problems afterward.

Now Sif was looking at him like someone contemplating drowning her sorrows at the bottom of a barrel.

Evenson had absolutely no intention of volunteering his liver.

"But..." Sif hesitated.

For someone normally so confident and warrior-like, she was surprisingly awkward now. Her eyes flicked toward Thor, and a faint blush touched her cheeks.

"But I really can’t talk about this unless I’ve had something to drink."

"Then don’t talk about it."

Evenson followed the direction of her gaze and sighed.

"You mean Thor?"

"Is it really that obvious?"

Sif nearly shouted the question. Thor glanced back at the sound, and she immediately smiled awkwardly until he turned around again.

Then she lowered her voice.

"Am I really that obvious?"

"You could actually try being more subtle."

Evenson rolled his eyes.

"Come on. Anyone with functioning eyes can tell how you feel. The only reason Thor hasn’t figured it out is because he’s Thor."

"Hmm..."

Sif looked embarrassed now that her feelings had been exposed so easily, but she finally began explaining.

"Last time, you told me that no one could fall in love with their own shadow. You said staying on Earth for a while might not be a bad thing. That distance could make the heart grow fonder."

Evenson’s stomach dropped.

Oh, hell.

That had been something he’d thrown out offhandedly. Had his brilliant advice somehow made things worse?

"Those words were more of a general guideline. You have to consider the circumstances..."

"Actually, they made a lot of sense."

"Oh."

Evenson quietly exhaled.

Thank God.

If his advice had somehow caused a disaster, Sif would probably have found a way to pour the drinks down his throat even if he refused to go drinking with her.

"After I’d spent some time on Earth and returned to Asgard, Thor became very attentive to me." A faint smile appeared on Sif’s face as she remembered those days. "He frequently invited me to the training grounds to spar. He even helped me improve my skills. He also gave me several swords, shields, and other weapons."

Evenson stared at her.

Sif, dear gods, did you have any idea what the word attentive meant?

"But then, after the rebellion across the Nine Realms had finally been put down, there was a victory feast. I asked Thor to dance with me."

"He refused."

"Maybe he doesn’t know how to dance," Evenson said, shrugging. "There’s no God of Dance among his divine responsibilities, after all."

The mental image of Thor attempting to dance was too horrifying to contemplate.

"Perhaps..."

Sif’s expression dimmed.

"But when he rejected me, I saw the sorrow in his eyes. That’s when I realized that Jane Foster was the only person in his heart. Everything he’d done for me was simply his way of making up for leaving me stranded on Earth. He still sees me as nothing more than a close friend."

She sighed.

"And that’s when everything turned around exactly as you warned me it might."

"What do you mean?"

"I’m back at Thor’s side all the time now, just as I used to be." Sif gave a helpless smile. "I’ve become his shadow again."

She glanced toward Jane.

"Meanwhile, Jane Foster remained on Earth. She’s the one Thor constantly thinks about. She became the person separated from him by distance."

"Things really do have a sense of humor sometimes."

Evenson shrugged.

Inside, however, he wanted to grab Sif by the shoulders and shake her.

You did this to yourself!

Why had she asked Thor to dance?

She should have gotten a bunch of people together, plied Thor with enough alcohol to knock an elephant unconscious, and then taken advantage of the situation.

With Thor’s personality, there was no way he’d refuse to take responsibility afterward.

Problem solved.

But there was no point saying any of that out loud.

"So now I’m asking you." Sif looked at him with complete trust. "Do you have any new ideas? Can you help me come up with a plan?"

Evenson felt a headache coming on.

"I don’t know what kind of advice I can give you. Feelings aren’t something you can force."

Why are you asking me?

He had practically no experience pursuing women.

He had even less experience pursuing men.

Honestly, his romantic history was mostly a record of other people making the first move.

If Sif had been asking about another woman, he might have been able to call Sarah for some outside advice.

But this was Thor.

He was out of his depth.

"Ugh..."

Sif suddenly grimaced and grabbed her left shoulder.

"My old injury is acting up again."

Evenson narrowed his eyes.

"The one from that meteor you summoned last time. Whenever the pain flares up like this..."

Sif suddenly fixed him with a deeply suspicious stare.

"...the only cure is about three barrels of alcohol with someone to keep me company."

Evenson swallowed.

"Wasn’t that your right shoulder?"

Sif blinked.

"What?"

She immediately switched hands and grabbed her right shoulder.

Then she reconsidered.

She switched back.

"My injury moved!"

Oh, come on.

This was extortion.

The meteor hadn’t even hit her directly last time. The shockwave had knocked her unconscious. Now she was claiming the injury had migrated?

Evenson was being shaken down for liquor.

Still, if refusing meant being dragged into an Asgardian drinking contest, he had no choice but to put his considerable fiction-reading experience to work.

"Actually," he said slowly, "I don’t think this is difficult at all."

"Oh?"

Sif’s shoulder suddenly seemed perfectly healthy.

The pain had vanished. Her posture straightened, and her eyes lit up.

"Then tell me. What should I do?"

"You see, back on Earth, or Midgard as you call it..."

Evenson’s eyes gleamed.

"There are certain extremely wealthy men. The sort who pull black liquid out of the ground and somehow become rich enough to buy entire countries."

Sif listened intently.

"Some of them have four wives."

Evenson pointed discreetly toward Thor’s back.

"But who exactly is Thor?"

He lowered his voice dramatically.

"He’s the crown prince of Asgard and the future ruler of the Nine Realms. Someone of his status could certainly have two wives. Who would dare object?"

Sif stared at him.

"Jane could even help you take care of Thor. Everyone gets their share."

Evenson nodded sagely.

"And considering your bloodline and status in Asgard, you’d obviously be the queen. Jane would, at most, be a secondary consort."

Sif’s expression immediately collapsed.

"But I don’t want the throne."

She looked him straight in the eye.

"I want his heart."

Evenson clicked his tongue.

"But you can’t deny that becoming queen would be a significant step forward."

He leaned closer, adopting the solemn tone of a man dispensing ancient romantic wisdom.

"There’s a huge difference between friendship and love. But sometimes that difference is thinner than a veil. If you became queen, you and Thor would be formally married. That veil would already be torn aside."

He spread his hands.

"With the history and friendship you already share, wouldn’t everything else naturally follow?"

Sif still looked uncertain.

"And even if Thor favored Jane for a while, she’s human. You don’t have to wait until she dies. Give it a decade or two and she’ll grow old."

Evenson continued before she could interrupt.

"You’re an Asgardian. You’ll retain your youth for a very long time. And from a biological standpoint, you and Thor would presumably have a much higher chance of producing children together than Thor and a human woman."

He delivered the final blow with complete confidence.

"Once you two have children, do you really think Thor could remain indifferent to you?"

Sif was visibly overwhelmed.

Asgardian tradition was still largely monogamous. Even Odin had only one queen.

Could Thor really marry two women?

But perhaps there were ways around that.

If Jane couldn’t have a formal title, perhaps she could simply become Thor’s lover.

That would leave Sif with an even greater advantage.

Sif’s expression changed.

She looked at Evenson as though she’d just discovered an entirely new branch of Midgardian civilization.

"I never realized Midgardians had so many... creative approaches to these matters."

"It’s nothing."

Evenson waved modestly.

Then he reached into his bag and pulled out two books.

"I actually have two manuals that might help you. Consider them gifts. They’ll ensure you’re never caught unprepared again."

Sif accepted them.

She looked at the covers.

One was The Legend of Zhen Huan.

The other was The Half-Moon Meniscus.

She had absolutely no idea what either title meant.

That didn’t matter.

She tucked both books away as carefully as if she’d just received two legendary Artifact Weapons.

At last, after a long journey, the group reached the Golden Palace.

The name was hardly an exaggeration.

The enormous palace gleamed from every angle, looking as though someone had carved an entire mountain of gold into a royal residence.

Evenson immediately wandered over to one of the walls and examined it closely.

Then his expression fell.

Not solid gold.

Just some kind of golden-colored metal.

What a disappointment.

He’d been hoping for gold bricks.

Even gold plating would have been acceptable. At least he could have scraped some off.

Once they entered the palace, Sif departed.

Thor, meanwhile, was so worried about Jane that he didn’t even stop to pay his respects to his father. He took Jane straight to the treatment chamber.

Several Asgardian healers laid Jane on an examination table and subjected her to a thorough examination using their advanced medical technology.

The results were inconclusive.

They couldn’t find anything wrong with her.

Then the doors opened.

A stern, white-haired man entered the room.

A golden eyepatch covered his right eye, and the sheer authority radiating from him made the room feel smaller.

If Thor wasn’t coming to see his father, then his father would simply come to see him.

The man’s first target was Thor.

He berated his son without hesitation.

Then he turned his attention toward Jane.

His attitude toward her was considerably worse.

He mocked her, dismissed her as little more than a piece of goat meat unfit for a proper feast, and bluntly suggested sending her straight back to Earth.

What’s wrong with goat meat?

Evenson silently frowned.

Goat is delicious.

Still, judging by the man’s attitude and the overwhelming presence surrounding him, Evenson already knew exactly who he was.

"You don’t even know who he is?"

Jane’s voice cut through the room.

She sat up, clearly offended.

"Who does he think he is to talk to me like that?"

Evenson rose immediately.

If the main character had finally entered the stage, it would be rude not to introduce him properly.

"You don’t know his name?"

Evenson stepped forward.

"Then allow me to introduce him."

He bowed with theatrical solemnity.

"To mortals, he is known by countless names. The God of War. Grimnir. The One-Eyed God. The High God. The Seeker of Truth. The All-Father. The Cloaked One. The God of the Staff."

The man’s eyebrow twitched.

Evenson continued without mercy.

"He is a figure who has worn more names than most mortals have worn clothes, shifting like the wind and appearing in as many forms as there are ways for a mortal to die."

A few people in the room stared at him.

"He has two ravens, Huginn and Muninn, Thought and Memory. He has two beloved wolves, Freki and Geri. And his favored steed is Sleipnir, the eight-legged horse."

Evenson finished with an exaggerated bow.

"Respected Father of the Gods. Mighty King of Asgard. Guardian of the Nine Realms."

He spread one hand dramatically.

"Odin."

Silence.

For several seconds, practically everyone in the room simply stared at him.

Even Odin himself seemed caught off guard.

Eventually, however, the All-Father recovered.

He turned to the guard standing behind him.

"Write all of that down."

The guard blinked.

"My king?"

"All of it. I had no idea Midgard held me in such high regard."

The guard nodded.

"Yes, my king."

"And one more thing."

Odin turned back.

"Have someone acquire two wolves for me."

The guard looked confused.

"Two wolves?"

"Yes. Name them..."

Odin frowned.

"What were their names again?"

"Freki and Geri, Father of All."

"That’s right."

Odin nodded.

"Freki and Geri. See to it."

The guard hurried off.

Odin then looked back at Evenson.

His expression had become noticeably warmer.

Everyone liked being praised.

And no one wanted to strike someone who had just showered them in compliments.

Besides, Odin knew that Evenson had fought alongside Thor on Earth. They had faced danger together and survived it together.

Asgardians placed great value on bonds forged in battle.

Compared to the woman he’d just dismissed as goat meat, this young man was suddenly looking considerably more respectable.

"I know who you are."

Odin gave Evenson a surprisingly kind smile.

"What brings you to Asgard?"

"I came at the request of another."

Evenson bowed once more.

"The Queen of the ancient Celts. Mystic, sorcerer, and supreme scholar of magic. Pioneer of the mystic arts. Mistress of the Mirror Dimension. Ruler of the White Arts. Keeper of the Eye of Agamotto. Founder of the Three Sanctums. Supreme authority of Kamar-Taj. Guardian of Midgard, Earth itself."

He slowly produced the token entrusted to him.

"Her name is the Ancient One."

Evenson presented the token with both hands.

"She has sent me to convey her greetings to Odin, All-Father and High King of Asgard."

He bowed deeply.

"May your reign endure for all eternity."