Chapter 320 - 0320: Shut Up, Jaxx

Chapter 320: Chapter 0320: Shut Up, Jaxx

Elena’s Point Of View

I stared at him, my mouth slightly open, frozen in absolute shock and utter disbelief. Jaxx... the Jaxx Moretti, a man whose pride was usually sturdier than a steel skyscraper, a man who treated vulnerability like a design flaw sat on the edge of his mattress, looking at me with raw, undisguised regret, and actively apologizing. Not with some smooth, tactical corporate excuse, either.

He looked completely unraveled, his voice carrying a rough, scraping weight that made my chest physically ache. The sight of him like this... stripped of his usual armor left me reeling. I’d never seen him so exposed, so human. It was as if someone had taken the polished, untouchable man and replaced him with a man who actually felt things, who actually hurt.

"Are you okay?" I finally managed to squeak out, my hand still halfway up between us, hovering awkwardly in the cool air. The question sounded absurd even to my own ears, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say. My brain had short-circuited somewhere between his apology and the devastated look in his eyes. "Did you... did you hit your head while you were away? Are you running a fever?"

Jaxx let out a dry, self-deprecating sound that was half-laugh, half-sigh, his large shoulders dropping an inch. The vulnerability in that simple gesture nearly undid me. I watched the tension bleed from his posture, watched him become something softer, more fragile than I’d ever witnessed. "I’m perfectly fine, princess. I’m sane. Or maybe I’m completely losing it - I don’t even know anymore."

He ran a hand through his hair, disheveling it in a way that made him look younger, more uncertain. Dark strands fell across his forehead, and I fought the urge to reach up and brush them back. "But I am sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I know it sounds completely absurd and so incredibly unlike me, but these past few weeks apart... they showed me how much you’ve grown on me, Elena. It’s like a sickness. I can’t handle your absence. It’s driving me out of my mind."

The confession hung in the air between us, heavy with meaning. I could see the effort it took him to say those words, could see the way his jaw tightened as if he were physically forcing them out.

"Jaxx..."

"No, let me finish," he interrupted smoothly, his gaze locking onto mine with an intensity that felt almost physical, pinning me to the pillows. His eyes held a desperate earnestness I’d never seen before, and it terrified me as much as it thrilled me. There was something wild in those dark depths, something uncontrolled and dangerous.

"I don’t know what it means. I don’t know what the hell is happening to my brain, but I know I want you by my side all the time. Every single day. I want the arguments, I want the attitude, I want the keys rattling on the kitchen island. I just want you."

The specificity of that last detail... the keys on the kitchen island hit me harder than anything else. It was such a small, domestic thing, such an ordinary moment, and yet he’d noticed it. He’d missed it. He’d missed me in all the tiny, mundane ways that actually mattered.

My throat instantly became incredibly tight, a thick, hot lump forming that I couldn’t swallow past. My chest felt constricted, the air leaving me in shallow, jagged little sips. I hated it. I hated how easily he could tear down my walls with a few sentences, how he could reduce me to this trembling, emotional mess.

The tears came before I could stop them... hot, heavy drops that I furiously tried to blink away. But it was useless. One broke free, tracking a wet line down my cheek, followed immediately by another. I felt exposed, vulnerable in a way that made me want to curl up and hide.

"Hey," Jaxx murmured, his face falling as he witnessed my tears. The anguish in his expression was palpable, as if each tear physically wounded him. He reached up, his large, rough thumb catching the moisture at my jawline with surprising gentleness.

The callused pad of his thumb was warm against my skin, and the tenderness of the gesture made more tears spill over. "Don’t do that. Don’t cry on me now, Bambina. I already feel entirely miserable for what I’ve put you through. Don’t make me feel even more like a monster."

His voice cracked on that last word, and I realized with a jolt that he meant it. He actually believed he was a monster. The self-loathing in his tone was unmistakable.

"It’s... it’s not because I’m annoyed," I sobbed out, my voice cracking embarrassingly as I grabbed his wrist. I tried to pull his hand away, though my grip was completely limp, betraying my true desire to keep him close. My fingers trembled against his skin, unable to commit to either pushing him away or pulling him closer.

I let out a frustrated, watery sniffle, angry at myself for this display of weakness. "I don’t even know why I’m crying, you idiot! I’ve been sitting in my house for three days straight, staring at a blank television screen, furious at you, and now you’re sitting here saying these ridiculous things and my face is just... doing this."

The admission hung between us, raw and honest. I’d spent those three days cycling through anger, hurt, and a longing I refused to name. I’d rehearsed a dozen different speeches, imagined a hundred different scenarios where I’d tell him exactly what I thought of him and his disappearing act.

But none of them had prepared me for this... for him, vulnerable and apologetic and utterly sincere. None of them had prepared me for the way my heart would lurch at the sight of him looking so broken, so desperate for forgiveness.

Jaxx didn’t say another word. He just leaned forward, his massive arms wrapping around my waist and pulling me forward until my chest collided with his solid torso. The impact knocked the breath from my lungs, but I didn’t care. He tucked my head right under his chin, his large hand coming up to cup the back of my head, pressing me firmly into his collarbone.

I could feel his heartbeat... rapid and strong matching the frantic rhythm of my own. The steady thump-thump-thump against my ear was oddly soothing, grounding me when everything else felt like it was spinning out of control.

He leaned down, his face buried deep into the crook of my neck, right where my hair parted. He let out a long, shuddering breath, inhaling my scent with a desperate, greedy sort of hunger. His nose brushed against the sensitive skin below my ear, and I felt goosebumps erupt across my entire body. The intimacy of the gesture... so raw, so unguarded made my heart clench. I felt him breathe me in like I was oxygen and he’d been drowning, like he needed this contact to survive.

"I’ve missed this," he whispered, his rough voice vibrating directly against my bare skin, sending a violent, electric shiver straight down my spine. His arms tightened around me as if he feared I might disappear, as if I were something precious and fragile that might slip through his fingers. "God, I missed you so much, Elena. It was driving me insane."

The sheer warmth of him, the familiar, heavy weight of his body pressing into mine, completely shattered whatever remaining logic I had left. The exhaustion, the frustration, the long days of wondering if he even cared... it all evaporated, leaving behind a raw, desperate hunger that matched his own.

In his arms, I felt both utterly vulnerable and completely safe, a contradiction that somehow made perfect sense. I felt like I was home, like this was where I belonged, and that realization terrified me more than anything else.

I pulled back just enough to look at his face. His lips were right there, parted slightly, his dark eyes wide and full of a strange, vulnerable heat that made my stomach flip. I could see my own reflection in those eyes, could see how much he wanted this... wanted me.

The intensity of his gaze made my breath catch, made my heart skip several beats in rapid succession. Without giving myself a second to think, without letting my stubborn brain talk me out of it, I lunged forward and kissed him.

It was a quick, hard collision of lips... a sharp, desperate punctuation mark to all his talking. His mouth was warm and soft, and the contact sent electricity coursing through my veins. For one perfect moment, everything else ceased to exist. There was only him, only us, only this.

I pulled back barely an inch, my breaths coming short and fast, my fingers digging into the fabric of his gray linen shirt. The material bunched under my grip as I held on, anchoring myself to him. I could feel the solid muscle beneath the fabric, could feel the heat of his skin radiating through the thin material.

I glared at him through my wet eyelashes, my heart hammering like a trapped bird. "Shut up," I breathed, my voice trembling but sharp, carrying all the frustration and longing and fear I’d been holding inside. "You talk too much, Jaxx. Just shut up."

Jaxx’s dark eyes flared, a slow, wicked, utterly feral smirk spreading across his face as his gaze dropped to my mouth. "Really? That’s all I get after weeks of torture? A little peck?" A low, gravelly chuckle escaped him, sending another wave of heat straight to my stomach. "Well, if you want me to shut up, princess... then you’ll have to do it properly."

I let out a ragged, breathless laugh, the last of my anger melting into an intense, simmering adrenaline that made my fingers tingle. The shift felt dangerous, exhilarating... like standing at the edge of a cliff I’d been too afraid to jump from. "Oh, is that a challenge?"

"Take it however you want, Bambina."

I didn’t hesitate. Shifting my weight, I crawled forward on my knees, my movements clumsy but entirely determined. I positioned myself right on top of him, straddling his thick, solid thighs, my jeans creating friction against his expensive trousers. My bare arms slid over his broad shoulders, my fingers tangling into the short, unruly hair at the nape of his neck. The texture surprised me... softer than I’d expected, warm beneath my touch.

Jaxx’s hands immediately found my waist, his large palms hot against the exposed skin where my off-shouldered crop top left me vulnerable. His fingers dug in with a fierce, possessive grip that pulled my hips flush against his, eliminating any pretense of distance between us. The contact sent a shockwave through my entire body, making me acutely aware of every point where we touched.

I reached down, my fingers cupping his sharp, stubbled jawline, forcing him to look straight up at me. My heart hammered so loudly I could hear it in my ears, feel it pulsing in my throat. His eyes held mine, darker than I’d ever seen them, pupils blown wide with an intensity that made my breath catch.

"Then let me do it properly," I whispered against his lips, my voice barely audible even in the quiet room.

I leaned down and closed the gap completely, burying my mouth against his.

This time, there was no rushing, no pulling back, no second-guessing. The moment our lips met, a heavy, suffocating wave of pure, unadulterated longing poured into the kiss. It was slow, thick, incredibly sensual... the pent-up frustration of three agonizing weeks bleeding into the pressure of his mouth against mine. Every argument we’d had, every loaded glance, every moment of stubborn silence, all of it dissolved into this single point of contact.

Jaxx groaned, a deep, rumbling sound from the back of his throat that I felt reverberate in my own chest. His grip on my waist tightened until there wasn’t a single inch of space left between our bodies, until I could feel the rapid rise and fall of his breathing matching my own erratic rhythm.

His lips parted mine with an absolute, unyielding hunger, his tongue tasting like the cold water I’d drunk earlier and the faint, sweet trace of whatever mint he’d been chewing. The kiss took on an aggressive, possessive rhythm that made my brain melt into absolute mush. I whimpered into his mouth, my fingers clenching into his dark hair, pulling him closer, deeper, as if I could somehow climb inside his chest and stay there forever.

"Elena..." he breathed against my skin as his mouth broke away for a fraction of a second, trailing down my chin to the sensitive line of my throat. His lips were hot, leaving a wet, burning trail along my skin that made my breath catch in a sharp gasp. The scrape of his stubble sent shivers cascading down my spine. "You’re going to be the death of me. I swear to God, you are."

"Good," I gasped out, my head tilting back to give him better access as his stubble scraped deliciously against my collarbone. The vulnerability of the position should have frightened me, but instead it felt like freedom. My hands slid down his neck, tracing the thick muscles of his shoulders before plunging down to attack the buttons of his shirt. I needed to feel his skin. I needed to know this was real and not another exhaustion-induced dream born from too many sleepless nights thinking about him. "Then stop talking and just... do it."

Jaxx let out another low, dark chuckle that sounded incredibly smug, his hands leaving my waist to slide slowly, deliberately up my ribs. His palms were rough, calloused from years of work I’d never asked about, and so hot they felt like brands against my skin, sending a frantic jolt of electricity straight to my core.

He traced the curve of my side, his fingers mapping out every line of my body through the thin fabric of my top as if committing it to memory. Then his hands slid back down to grip my hips, tilting me upward just enough to align our bodies completely.

The sheer, raw sensation of him moving beneath me made my head spin, made the room tilt on its axis. I leaned down again, catching his lower lip between my teeth with a sharp, playful bite that made him hiss in surprise, his fingers flexing against my skin.

"You’re a menace, princess," he muttered, his dark eyes glittering with a dangerous, playful fire as his hands slid underneath the hem of my cropped shirt. His bare fingers finally made contact with the smooth skin of my lower back, and the touch was electric, arching my spine automatically as he pulled me down into another deep, bruising kiss that completely stole the remaining air from my lungs.

The kiss went on and on, growing more passionate, more frantic with every passing second, our breaths tangling together in the dim, quiet room. His hands were everywhere... sliding up to cup my shoulder blades, dropping back down to squeeze my waist, his long fingers trailing patterns over my skin that made me completely forget my own name, forget every reason I’d told myself this was a bad idea.

It was an undeniable declaration of everything we hadn’t said over the last month... every unspoken apology, every suppressed desire, every moment of wanting that we’d both been too proud or too afraid to acknowledge. This was a total surrender of his pride and my stubbornness, a white flag raised in the war we’d been waging against each other and ourselves.

By the time he finally pulled back to let me breathe, my lips were swollen, my bare shoulders were flushed a deep pink, and my chest was heaving as I stared down at his dark, beautiful face. The sight of him like this... hair mussed from my fingers, lips reddened from our kisses, eyes soft in a way I’d never witnessed made something in my chest tighten almost painfully.

He was smiling... a real, genuine, unhurried smile that reached his eyes, crinkling the corners and making him look younger, happier than I’d ever seen him. It transformed his entire face, stripping away the hardness he usually wore like armor.

"Better?" he whispered, his thumb lightly tracing the bottom of my lip with a tenderness that contradicted the intensity of moments before.

I leaned my forehead against his shoulder, letting out a long, shaky sigh of pure, content exhaustion. The adrenaline was beginning to ebb, leaving behind a bone-deep satisfaction and the kind of vulnerability that comes from finally giving in to something you’ve been fighting for too long. "Shut up, Jaxx. Just stay right here."