Daiki

(Shin's PoV)

—

Daiki walked down the corridor with his bag hanging from one shoulder and his head low. I let him get about ten steps ahead before I followed.

The crowd had parted for him like he was carrying something contagious, whispers rising behind him and dying away whenever he passed. A person who leaves a room like that wants to be alone.

I knew what it looked like when someone wanted to disappear.

So I kept my pace slow, watching his back. When he turned a corner, I turned it after him.

He went past the stairs, then down the narrow flight leading to the gym. At the bottom was a gray door with a laminated sign taped to it.

ATHLETICS CLUB STORAGE

AUTHORIZED MEMBERS ONLY

Daiki pushed it open without even looking at the sign, the same way you open a door you've used a thousand times. It swung almost shut behind him.

I then stopped outside and counted to twenty.

'Well... this is going to be hard...' I sighed.

I didn't have a speech prepared even though I'd told Sora, "I'm going to Daiki," like I knew exactly what I was supposed to do once I found him.

'Now or never...'

I put two fingers against the door and eased it open.

The room smelled of chalk and old rubber. Hurdles leaned against one wall, folded mats were stacked beneath the window, and a net bag full of volleyballs hung from a hook near the shelves.

Daiki sat on the floor between two mats, his back against the wall and his hands resting on his knees while staring at nothing in particular.

"Daiki." I called out, my voice soft.

He only turned his head, and one corner of his mouth rose into a smile that never made it any farther.

"Oh. Hey... Well," he said. "What can I say? Did you enjoy the show? You have officially seen how unlucky Daiki Sakurai is. Funny, isn't it?" He leaned his head back against the wall and stared at the ceiling. "And to think I was so happy with her."

I then came in, closed the door, and sat beside him, close enough that our sleeves touched.

"No," I said. "You were lucky, actually. People like that are better off lost."

"You're right." He breathed out through his nose. "I know you’re right, and it still doesn't make me feel any better." His head dropped back against the wall. "It had to go like this, I guess. Luck was not on my side this time... that's sad." He sighed.

For a while neither of us said anything. Somewhere above us, we could hear a class reciting something in unison, muffled by two floors of concrete while a strip of light came through the narrow window and stretched across the floor between our shoes.

After a few minutes, Daiki looked at me.

"It was Akane, wasn't it?" He asked, his voice tired.

I nodded.

"That signature on the photo was too obvious..." He shook his head slowly. "I laughed. Only for half a second, but I laughed, even if it was only in my head. 'The heroine of this new story I'm writing.' It was original, I must admit."

"Well, I can't blame you, to be honest..." 

"I figured it was her." He picked at a loose thread on the knee of his trousers. "But still... there's something I don't get, though. I thought I'd feel satisfied after seeing something like that, like... I don't know. It's strange."

His fingers stopped moving.

"But when I saw her face, the way she grabbed my arm and tried to steer me away like nothing was happened..." His jaw tightened. "That disgusted me even more. And somehow I feel worse than I did yesterday."

"I can imagine."

"You know what? I don't care about anything anymore, Shin." There was no drama in the way he said it. That made it worse. "I took a bad hit right before graduation. I think I'm going to finish my whole school life remembering that I got betrayed and be remembered from my classmates like a pathetic guy. Damn. But that's my fault for thinking that I could be happy." He gave me another small, bitter smile. "That's pretty sad, isn't it?"

I looked at the hurdles against the wall.

There was something I'd never told him despite he'd sat next to me in class, eaten lunch beside me, shouted my name across the courtyard, and I'd never let him see any of it.

My fingers went to the ring on my hand and then I stopped.

"You're not the only one who's been betrayed, Daiki." I said, my voice softening.

"I know. Everyone knows what happened on Valentine's Day." He gave me a tired look. "But at least you're more than happy now. And you deserve it."

"There's more to it..." A pause. "If it weren't for her," I said, "I wouldn't be here right now."

His expression changed. "What do you mean?"

"Do you remember when Kurone chose Kenji in front of the whole school?"

"Yeah. the Valentine's Day thing." His face darkened. "Everyone saw it. I tried to find you afterward, but you'd already gone."

"A few minutes later, I was on the school roof." I said, my voice flat.

Daiki's eyes stayed on me.

"I wanted to end it. All of it." My body flinched a little.

After my words, Daiki's expression emptied.

"Akane found me up there. And she saved my life."

Daiki didn't move.

I could see the words reaching him piece by piece. His hands slipped from his knees. His mouth opened, but for a few seconds nothing came out.

"What...?" His voice cracked. "Shin. What? Why didn't you tell me anything? I would've dragged you to the arcade! I would've..." He stopped and looked away. "I would've done something."

"I know you would've... I know..." I sighed. 

"Then why?"

I had an answer I'd rehearsed in my head for years. Something short, clean, easy to say, but when I tried to use it, it fell apart, and something else came out.

"Because Kurone was the only thing keeping me attached to the idea of living, Daiki." I looked down at the strip of light between our shoes. "My parents left me for a job in Italy years ago, and I stayed. I was alone in that house, and the only reason I got as far as I did was because of a promise Kurone and I made in a sandbox when we were kids." I laughed once under my breath. "I know how that sounds. I didn't care how badly she treated me, and I didn't even care about being seen as a devoted puppy dog. As long as that promise existed, I had something to hold on to."

Daiki listened without interrupting, which for him was surreal.

"So look at it this way," I said. "You walked out with your head up and took it like a man.” A pause. “You know… on Valentine's Day, Kurone came to me right after she kissed Kenji Yamada in a very passionate way. She was smiling despite she knew about the promise and the flowers in my hand." The memory felt strangely distant now. "And she asked, with the most normal voice you could get from her, 'Aren't you happy for me, Shin?'"

Daiki stared at me.

"That's disgusting," he whispered. "I had no idea she did that."

"I know..." I sighed. "I wonder how nobody talked about that since there were a lot of students watching the scene.'

"Well... uhm... I'm sorry." He scratched the back of his head. "I had no idea..."

"Don't be, sorry, Daiki. Really." I meant it. That surprised me a little. "I think everything happens for a reason. At that moment, life had decided to take me to a different path, and Akane happened to be on the new one." I glanced at him. "I'm happy now. Really happy. I don't even hold a grudge against Kurone anymore. She made a choice back then. I can't blame her after all..."

There were many other things to say, but I couldn't...

Then Daiki let out a long breath and rubbed a hand over his face. When he lowered it, his eyes were red again, but at least he was looking at me instead of through me.

"I envy you," he said. "I mean it." He stayed quiet for a moment. "But why are you telling me all this?"

"Because I know how you feel." I turned toward him. "I know the anger. I know that urge to throw every word you're holding back right in her face. I carried that feeling too, but in the end it did nothing for me. Izumi won't come back, and even if you tell her everything, it won't change what happened." I put a hand on his shoulder. "It's not worth it. Don't poison your blood over somebody who doesn't deserve a crumb of your kindness."

Daiki looked at my hand, his eyes widening.

"The best revenge you've got right now is to smile at her and act completely indifferent. Trust me. It works." I smiled.

He then looked back at me, and a small smile appeared. This one reached his eyes. It was crooked and exhausted, but still real.

"Thanks, Shin," he said. "You're a good friend. I'll admit that."

He slapped my shoulder twice, hard enough to sting.

That was how Daiki said almost everything important.

"Ah damn, when was the last time we talked like this, Shin? I can't remember..." He sighed.

"Maybe last year. On Christmas." I giggled.

Then, something buzzed inside his bag.

We both looked at each other, and it buzzed again.

"Take it." I said.

"Yeah..." Daiki sighed, pulled out his phone, and checked the screen.

"It's Izumi," he said. "Four messages."

He read them aloud in the same flat voice someone might use for a list of ingredients.

"'Daiki, please, let me explain...'"

He scrolled.

"'Why did you leave me standing there? That was cruel.'"

Another.

"'It wasn't you who put up that photo, was it? I swear that isn't me. I was home yesterday...'"

His thumb stopped on the last message.

"'Please answer me. I need to talk to you. You're making this more tragic than it is. Please wait for me outside school after classes.'"

He lowered the phone onto his knee.

"'I was home yesterday,'" he repeated, before a short, dry laugh escaped him. "Right."

He then turned the phone over in his hand and stared at it like it might bite him.

"What should I do? You're the love expert here." He asked.

"Ignore it. She's probably gonna send you dozen of other texts during the day." I sighed. "Also, the real love expert here is Akane."

Daiki thought about that for a few seconds, then slipped the phone into his pocket.

"You know," he said, "Now that I think about it... Akane is still terrifying. Don't ever betray her. My instinct says she's capable of very violent things."

"She is. Trust me." He turned toward me. "But I love her anyway."

"You're embarrassing, Shin." He laughed. "Way too much."

"I know." I then stood up and held out my hand to him. "We should go to class. And if you want to do something after school, I'm there."

He grabbed my hand and let me pull him up. Once he was standing, he narrowed his eyes at me.

"Oh? You're free?" His eyebrows rose. "How come? Doesn't Akane usually keep you hostage?"

"She has plans with Sora today. I'm glad the two of them are getting closer."

"Speaking of the president..." He rubbed his chin.

"Mh? What about her?" I asked, curious.

Daiki stopped. His mouth closed, and he shook his head. "Never mind. I'll tell you later."

"Okay. For now, let's try not to make the teachers angry. Takaneda-sensei is out today, and I think the festival activities are suspended. Tanaka-sensei is probably covering and we have to attend classes like normal students today."

"Right..." He sighed, scratching the back of his hair. "But... wait. You mean Tanaka-sensei... the vice principal?"

"Yeah."

Daiki groaned and covered his face. "That's even worse than a 24/7 session with Takaneda-sensei."

"I know. But hey, we have a full weekend after today." I said.

He then lowered his hand and looked at me for a few instants before smiling. "Thanks, Shin. For all of it."

"No need to thank me. Let's just go before we get scolded."

"Yeah... right..." 

And then, we left the storage room and climbed the stairs side by side.

The building had settled into its first-period quiet, a low hum behind closed classroom doors, with our footsteps carrying through the stairwell. On the second landing, I took out my phone and typed with one thumb.

Shin: The show was quite something...

Akane answered before we reached the corridor.

Akane: I know. I saw everything. It was very entertaining.

I put my phone away. I'd ask later where she'd been watching from.

The school was louder than usual today. Voices slipped through classroom doors along with a teacher's steady voice, the scrape of a chair, someone laughing… normal things.

And then, after a few minutes, we reached our classroom, and Daiki stopped with one hand on the frame of the sliding door.

I waited beside him.

Then, he took a deep breath and slid it open, and the room fell silent.

Every head turned toward him.

Thirty pairs of eyes stayed there. Some curious. Some uncomfortable. A few people looked away almost immediately, while others didn't bother hiding the judgment on their faces.

A girl by the window leaned toward her desk mate and whispered behind her hand. A boy in the second row folded his arms.

Daiki stood in the doorway with his bag on his shoulder.

For a moment, he didn't move.

Then he straightened his back and walked in.