Regressor Instruction Manual

Chapter 1349. Return (9)

“...”

“...”

“Carlton... yesterday... wasn’t a dream, was it?” Big Boy asked.

“...”

“...”

“It just feels so unreal... but the Honorary Cardinal really was here yesterday, wasn’t he?” Big Boy asked.

“...”

“Hey, Carlton... Carlton... yesterday, we—”

“How many times are you gonna ask, you idiot?! I’m dead tired. You, me, and Yoojin all saw it, so of course, it actually happened. The autograph and the photo are right there... Stop asking me and look at those yourself, you idiot. They're right there...” I[1] said, cutting him off.

I turned, and shockingly enough, I saw myself, Big Boy, Yoojin, and the Honorary Cardinal in a photo together. The three of us had awkward smiles, while the Saint of Sacrifice and Revival was grinning brightly. The three signed papers Yoojin had bravely asked for were next to the photo.

Those items proved that what had happened yesterday wasn’t a mere dream. I checked them with my own eyes several times the moment I woke up the next day—no, I couldn’t even sleep properly last night because I couldn't stop thinking about them.

‘On top of that...’

We received a blessing. The Honorary Cardinal’s blessing—something I had only heard of in rumors. It seemed a bit different from how the media described it for others, but we had undoubtedly received his blessing. Even that arrogant Alex from the Continental Protection Management Committee hadn’t been able to get one, but we actually got one.

The only thing that bothered me was that I cried like a child at the time. Normally, that would have been enough to make me a target for teasing from those bastards, but this time, I wasn't alone. We all bawled together. Of course, I had no idea why I cried. The only thing I remembered was feeling unbearably sad, as if my emotions had been completely in sync with him.

“I-I still don’t really know what happened yesterday,” Big Boy said.

“M-me, neither...” Yoojin mumbled.

“Carlton, you—”

“I also have no idea. We just got lucky, you idiots. T-the kid we happened to pick up... turned out to be the Honorary Cardinal, and we just happened to help him at the right time.

"He said he was working undercover or something... I don’t know why he got younger, but I’m sure he had his reasons, and it’s none of our business. Whether it was a dream or real life... man...” I interrupted him.

“Right?” Big Boy asked.

“Yeah, you idiots. We were just lucky, thank goodness. Imagine if we had somehow ended up hurting the Honorary Cardinal. I couldn’t even sleep last night, thinking that we may have done something wrong,” I told them.

“Oh? Now that I think about it... we didn’t mess up yesterday, did we?” Yoojin asked.

“Probably not. If we had messed up, the Continental Protection Management Committee or the Blue Guild would have already come knocking by now. Anyway, there’s one thing I want to tell you guys...” I paused.

“What is it?” Yoojin asked.

“Let's just forget what happened yesterday,” I continued.

“...”

“I know you probably want to brag about it, but we should stay quiet. The priests from the Order said nothing, but they definitely won't want us to run our mouths about what we saw. Just the fact that the Honorary Cardinal somehow got younger—if word of that got out, there’d be chaos everywhere,” I warned them.

“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” Yoojin said.

“Just think of it as one of those once-in-a-lifetime miracles. There’s no need for anyone to know that he blessed us and that we helped him. We live in completely different worlds anyway. You get what I’m saying, right? Big Boy?” I asked.

“Why are you asking me specifically?” Big Boy questioned.

“Because you’re the one most likely to make a scene, you idiot! I’m worried you’ll go talk about it to everyone. Do you understand what I’m saying?!” I asked.

“Yeah, I get it...” Big Boy mumbled.

“It was just a dreamlike thing that happened once—and that was yesterday, got it?” I yelled at him.

“Yeah, of course I get it,” he said.

“Just because we talked with him a bit, received his blessing, and took a photo with him won't change anything. Today, we're going to work the same as we did yesterday, act the same as we always do, and live just like we’ve been living.

"That’s the best course of action for us,” I told them.

“...”

“...”

Looking at Big Boy’s downcast face, I couldn’t help but think that perhaps...

‘I think it'd be okay to let him stay a little excited.’

However, I quickly shook my head. Big Boy was a bit emotional by nature, and in situations like this, there was no telling what kind of mistake he would end up making.

If he were allowed to do whatever he wanted, his words and actions by then wouldn’t do us any good.

If we suddenly started acting like we were special just because of our brief encounter with the Honorary Cardinal, then we would eventually stumble and fall hard.

It couldn’t be helped that the guy looked dejected, but thinking of it as preventing trouble down the road made it a fair trade. His lips were pouting in protest, but he seemed to have understood my sentiments.

‘Well... that’s a relief.’

Perhaps living by the sword had taught us to tell right from wrong. It wasn’t the perfect comparison, but if we thought of our situation as that of adventurers who had accidentally succeeded on an expedition, it would make complete sense.

We were happy, of course, but getting too drunk on a single success brought about by a stroke of luck would only make it harder for us to live our everyday lives.

Thankfully, Big Boy and Yoojin eventually got ready for work. Leaving behind yesterday’s miracle, we put on the same sweat-soaked shirts and headed toward Straggler’s Lane.

It was still dawn. After prepping the hambier meat delivered from a supplier, I was thinking about making the sauce Big Boy had spent a fortune to learn when something strange caught my eye—something completely out of place.

‘What the hell? This early in the morning?’

“What’s that, Carlton?” Yoojin asked.

“Don’t ask me everything, Yoojin...” I told her.

“What is that, Carlton!” Big Boy also asked.

“Ah! I said, don't ask me, Big Boy!” I yelled at him.

“Why are there so many people?” Big Boy asked.

“Did some kind of accident happen?” Yoojin questioned.

It was still dawn, but the streets were already packed with people.

The unusually dense crowd caught my attention.

‘What... is that?’

I froze and wondered if this was due to some incident.

A certain incident then came to mind.

“You guys... You didn’t tell anyone that we met the Honorary Cardinal yesterday, did you?” I asked.

“N-no, Carlton, not me!” Big Boy quickly answered.

“We were together all day—when would we have had any time for that?” Yoojin argued.

“Then what is that?” I questioned.

Visitors of Stragglers’ Lane were always the same sort of people; most of them were adventurers or mercenaries as well, so the place was normally empty at dawn, as everyone was out hunting.

However, the scene before me completely betrayed my expectations.

‘What the hell... is this?’

I saw not just adventurers but city folks who probably had no idea that this place even existed in the first place. I even saw scholarly-looking people holding hand mirrors, seemingly busy recording the place.

I also saw reporters from the Lindel Daily and people from broadcast stations, and they were all standing right in front of the shop. No wonder I was feeling awkward. The crowd didn’t belong here, and neither did this atmosphere.

The usual drunkards were gone, replaced by people who looked... important.

“There they are!”

“Huh?”

“Over there!”

Just then, they ran toward us and surrounded us, even though we were wearing our sweat-stained shirts. What followed was a bombardment of questions.

“When do you open?”

“Uh... sorry?” Yoojin asked.

“We open in the afternoon...” I mumbled.

“What? In the afternoon?”

“He says they open in the afternoon!”

“Can’t you open earlier? I’ve got work later.”

“Ahhh! No way! I came too early!”

“No, we should start lining up now. Do you have a waiting list?”

‘A waiting list? In this shabby little hambier skewer joint? Yeah, right.’

Despite that, they were customers. Real ones, too. Not the usual drunkards and hooligans.

“We don’t have anything like that—”

“You should’ve prepared those ahead of time!” one of them interrupted.

“Come on, we’re just a tiny skewer joint that barely gets any customers. Why would we even need that?” I argued.

“Huh? You guys didn’t know?”

“...”

“The Honorary Cardinal posted your skewer shop on his personal account!” a young man exclaimed.

“What?” I asked.

A very familiar sight appeared on the screen of the young man’s hand mirror. I couldn’t tell exactly where the photo was taken, but there, clearly visible on the table, were our very own hambier skewers.

‘When... was that taken?’

“When on earth was this—”

“Last night! It’s the first post the Honorary Cardinal has made in ages, and the whole world’s going crazy over it! I mean, look around you. Don't you see the reporters and broadcast crews here?!” the young man shouted.

'At the Blue Guild office? A drink with Deok-Gu after such a long time? A good eating spot? Big Boy’s Hambier Skewers? Emojis?'

‘What the hell is going on?’

“He even uploaded a video!” the young man added.

The young man holding out the Goddess’ Hand Mirror hit the play button, and I saw Park Deok-Gu devouring a hambier skewer as if he were possessed. The Shield of Faith, Blue Guild’s famous tank, was eating our skewers.

The way he devoured those skewers on camera made me swallow hard, even though I was intimately familiar with the taste of those skewers.

"This is insane! This! What is this flavor, hyung-nim?!"

“...”

"Damn... it even goes perfectly with beer! Straggler’s Lane? Big Boy’s Hambier Skewers? You’re really out here eating good stuff all by yourself, huh?"

"..."

"Can I have one more? No, no, I’m not being greedy... Okay, yeah, I am being greedy! Hand me that one! Do you have other flavors, too?"

The Honorary Cardinal wasn't in the video, and his voice couldn't be heard either. Of course, I knew exactly why; there was no way he could show himself. He had gotten younger, after all.

“The Honorary Cardinal has never revealed what he likes to eat! Until now, it was just Mirror Salmon and Rainbow Cotton Candy! However, hambier skewers are something that mercenaries often eat! Can you believe it? The Honorary Cardinal eating hambier skewers!

"It’s insane! He must’ve loved it so much that he followed your shop and promoted it himself!” the young man explained.

“F-follow? Follow... what?” I asked, stammering.

“You’re one of the few accounts the Honorary Cardinal actually follows! Your hambier skewer shop’s account is on his list!” the young man exclaimed.

“I have no idea what that even means...” I muttered.

“The Blue Guild Master! The Archmage Jung Ha-Yan! The Republic’s Commander Jin Cheong! The official account of the Order of Benigoa! Those are the kinds of accounts he follows, and your account is right there among them! If you don’t get it, just think of it as a huge deal,” the young man explained.

“What are you talking about... We don’t even have an account like that...” I said.

“Sure you do! It’s right here, plain as day!” the young man said, showing me an account.

“Hey, Big Boy! Did we ever make some kind of social media account?” I asked.

“No idea. Did you make one, Yoojin?” Big Boy asked.

“I don’t know either, you idiots!” Yoojin replied.

“Wait—don’t tell me you haven’t followed him back yet!” the boy said.

“Followed... back? Whatever that means, probably not,” I said.

“How could you not follow the Honorary Cardinal back?! You know the Republic’s military is still receiving hate for that exact reason. Hurry up and do it! Quickly!” he said, hurriedly.

Chaos erupted all around.

“Just open the shop already!”

“We need to prepare first!” Yoojin shouted.

“Can we get a quick interview?”

“No, we’ve got to get ready for business—Ah! Please, everyone from the press, step aside! We’re not doing any TV appearances! Let us prepare! Our place competes on taste alone—what’s all this about being on TV all of a sudden...” Big Boy said.

I caught sight of Big Boy’s face, practically glowing with excitement. It was no wonder; those horribly bland hambier skewers were now getting rave reviews.

‘Is this a dream or reality?’

I told them to act as usual, but who could possibly act normally in a situation like this?

“Open the shop, Big Boy!”

“Huh? Already? The sauce isn’t even ready yet...” Big Boy said.

“We’ve got to strike while the iron is hot! Just open up! We’ll think about the rest once the doors are open and the queues are sorted!” Yoojin told him.

“O-okay!”

Just then, I spotted something—an oddly familiar figure wearing a hood.

1. Carlton’s POV ☜