Chapter 1: The NPC Who Died Twice

Author’s Note: I am writing this novel purely for our entertainment. If you want a more serious and meticulously crafted novel, you can check out my other novel, "Sunblind Serpent: The Zodiac Without A House."

Please check the Auxiliary Chapters! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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"What the hell? Are you an NPC? I thought you were a pro!"

"Even the NPCs are better than him!"

"Fuck! He died to a little mob!"

"What do you know, you bitches? This is my life. I do what I want."

"Yeah, thanks for the win. I’m truly grateful, asshole. :)))))"

Zishan slapped his keyboard and jerked his mouse across the desk. "Fuck these assholes. This game just got released! What do they expect me to do, memorize every fucking mob pattern in three hours?"

He shot to his feet and stomped around his room. "I need to eat cupcakes. When will the delivery arrive—"

A knock came from the door.

His eyes lit up the moment he heard the sound. He immediately ran toward the door and quickly opened it with a big smile on his face. "Has it arr—"

His smile disappeared, and he closed the door without hesitation. "Just some fucked-up classmates from my block. What are they doing again in my dormitory? I’m just trying to have a peaceful life!"

"Hey, Zishan! We’re here to—"

"What? You’re saying you’re going to leave? Okay! Bye! See you in class tomorrow!"

Half a beat later, they left.

"Finally! Some peace—of shit! Why are you back again?!" he exploded when another knock came from the door.

Just as he was about to sit back down, he stopped the moment he heard a different voice.

"Order delivery for Zishan Walker?"

His scrunched face immediately softened—faster than lightning. "Oh, Brother of the Goddess. You’re finally here..."

He opened the door with a wide smile on his face as he received the box. "Thank you so much for this, brother. I already paid for this online."

"Sure, sir," the delivery person replied, smiling back. "I’m off now, sir. Have a great night!"

"You too, brother. May fortune follow you forever."

When there was finally peace and quiet, he placed the cupcake just beside his computer keyboard.

"This is the most expensive cupcake I have ever bought," he said as he opened the box very carefully. "Its design must be off the charts. I can’t wait to see the dragon frosting. Damn! This will be the best day of my life, but I’ll get back to it once I’m done roasting those guys in the newly launched game!"

"Oh! The NPC is back again!"

"HAHAHAHAHA! He’s back again! Look! He’s been killed by a Level 1 Mob again!"

"HAHAHA! This is so funny!"

Seeing all these messages, Zishan went mad. He lifted his keyboard and smashed it on the table. But something worse happened. He accidentally slapped the cupcake away, too.

"NOOOOOOO!"

His reflexes worked wonders as he jumped to the floor without a second of hesitation just to save the cupcake he had just bought. The moment he fell face-flat, he realized that he had managed to save it. However, what he failed to notice was that one of his feet had gotten caught in a cable. He panicked and immediately tried to stand up, causing the table to jerk violently and the cup of water on top of it to fall to the floor.

"FUCKKKK!"

Then, he accepted his fate faster than the speed of light. "Okay, that’s it, but at least let me have a bite of my cupcake."

However, before he could even take a bite, he got electrocuted.

ZZZT!

"FU-U-UU-UUU-UUCK!"

His consciousness blurred.

Gasping, he opened his eyes. Chaos surrounded him. People were shouting from every direction as swords clashed against each other with sharp metallic rings. The smell of blood hung heavily in the air, mixed with smoke and dirt.

Somewhere nearby, something massive roared, followed by another beast answering from farther away. The ground beneath him even trembled from the impact of something he couldn’t see.

"Oh, great... a war."

Zishan remained on the ground for a few seconds before suddenly widening his eyes. "Wait! Wait a fucking minute!"

His face turned pale the moment he recalled something. "Where the hell is my cupcake?! I haven’t even taken a bite yet! Fuck my life!"

He stood up abruptly when a headache struck him. He glanced around him. "Where the hell am I?!"

"We’re definitely losing! Shit!" he heard a man cuss. "Hey, kid, what are you doing in the middle of the battlefield? Get out of here if you don’t want to die!"

Zishan looked at the man. "Where is this?"

"What do you mean, kid?" The man launched an attack at something behind Zishan. "Shit! Just run back to our camp! You’re making it hard for me to fight here!"

"(¬_¬)" would be the kind of emoticon he would give this man if this were a game.

Then, Zishan heard the famous "DING" sound ringing in his ears. "What the hell was that?"

Even though he was very suspicious of the man in front of him, he still ran in the direction the man pointed. When he had already run far, the man immediately realized something. "Fuck! I gave him the wrong direction! He’s heading towards the enemy’s camp!"

[DING!]

[Foreign causal signature detected.]

[Vessel compatibility confirmed.]

[Dormant Core detected.]

While he kept running, evading the fights and clashes between soldiers as much as he could, there was some kind of greenish system panel appearing in front of him. "What the hell? Am I inside some kind of game—"

"FUCK! SOMEONE’S CHASING ME! SHIT. SHIT. SHIT."

[Activating Reward Reservation System!]

[Status: Incomplete]

[Reconstructing...]

"Oh Goddess of Cupcakes, please help me!" he prayed, running as fast as he possibly could. "Curse those people who will run after me! Tomorrow, I swear all of you guys will die under a cow’s dung!"

[Reconstruction Complete]

[True Core Restored]

"What use is that now? Give me something helpful! If you’re like a system from a novel! Give me something! Just please help me! I still want to eat more cup—shit!" He ducked and rolled on the mud as some sort of flame was about to hit him in the head. "Fuck! They’re coming close now!"

[PRECEDENCE SYSTEM ACTIVATED]

[Primary Function Unlocked: ADVANCE CLAIM]

"What the heck is that? How is that going to help me?! Fuck, they’re coming!" He forced himself to stand up and run again. His legs felt sore, but he had to keep going if he wanted to eat more cupcakes.

[DING! You have received a new quest, Dumb Host!]

"Who are you calling dumb?!"

[EMERGENCY QUEST]

[Survive the Fallen Front!]

[Objective: Escape the battlefield alive!]

[Completion Possibility: 3.17%]

[Rewards: +10 VIT; +10 AGI; Rift Steps (Trace-Tier Skill); Ashen Banner Bloodline (Vestige-Grade Bloodline)]

"ISN’T THAT BASICALLY IMPOSSIBLE?!" Zishan complained, but his thoughts were processing very fast.

[PRECEDENCE AVAILABLE]

[Claim Rewards Before Completion?]

[YES / NO]

"What?! I can claim the rewards even though I haven’t completed the quest yet? What sort of broken ability is this?!"