Please Be Quiet And Take Off Your “Something”

Chapter 68

“I’ve got no reason nor time to spare to burden you, and I’m too lazy anyway.”

“……”

“It’s tiresome to act like trash, and even more to toy with you. Even to make fun of you is a bother.” [T/N: It is not obvious (especially to Na-Yool!), but Si-Jin is actually still saying these things on purpose to reassure her that he will neither play with her nor fall for her, because he thinks that is what she is scared of. Too bad he is only half-right! ><] What was he currently doing, if not making fun of her… Na-Yool unconsciously sighed whereas Si-Jin was playfully grabbing her cheeks puffed up in a pout. He fondled her face into funny expressions and, as if appraising the sight, he mumbled: “If I toy with you, I feel you will be chasing me for the rest of your life.” “Me? How could that be.” “Is that so?” “As if I would have nothing better to do. I will show no interest, not even in what you will be doing with your life.” She recited her lines like an artificial intelligent machine reading a book. Sometimes, being overly sincere rather sounded hypocritical. By trying to convey sincerity, the complete lack of it had instead permeated her voice… “Are you sure you won’t want to get even with me?” “In the first place, it is impossible for you to toy with me Mr. President. Because I really am far from being someone who clings to people. Even if they wrong me, I will forget it after a moderate amount of time.” “So you mean I can toy with you as much as I want?” “I swear, those jumps of logic of yours…” With a worn-out expression, Na-Yool twisted her head out of Si-Jin’s grip. He shrugged. “What would you do if I made up my mind to play with you? And if you helplessly fall for me on your own.” Na-Yool almost spat out that the fear of such a result was precisely the reason for her current behavior, but she blocked the words from coming out and gave him a cold stare. Si-Jin’s lips moved within a calmly engrossed expression. “But then if you fall for me like that, you won’t be able to come out of it.” Despite getting carried away with such nonsense, his tone was completely dull. Na-Yool snorted. “Who are you talking about? Who! Who would fall for who, and who would play with whom!” “Of course, the consequences would be no joke too.” “I am a carefree person. Really.” “Undoubtedly so.” “But it does not mean that you can act dirty or half-heartedly throw yourself at me.” [T/N: Si-Jin is using a “if I play with you, will you be a mess afterwards once you fall for me” approach to probe into Na-Yool’s real feelings here, but she’s still keeping them firmly under lock.] Still making an undoubtedly engrossed expression, his staring on her face felt oddly uncomfortable. Na-Yool pushed his head away with her palm and sat down. She covered her bare breasts with the bedsheets and, noticing her clothes which had been placed at some time on the table, she was about to get up. “I don’t believe you.” Was that something to say at someone’s back despite having sex with them for 2 straight days… “… I, too, do not really believe you either, Mr. President.” “Clearly, if I badly mess around with you, there will be some kind of aftermath.” “To begin with, the only thing you should have not messed with is your thingy down there. You might want to reflect on that first…” “That’s why I can’t toy with you.” “…Isn’t your conclusion abnormal?” It was a completely self-centered pledge to not do anything bad only to prevent any aftermath he would have to deal with from happening. “Out of consideration for my egocentric and fastidious nature, rest assured and let’s enjoy.” “No words indeed suit you better than ‘egocentric and fastidious’, but you have already…” Na-Yool’s words spoke for themselves as she gazed at the scene where they had gone wild. “Nothing has gone wrong so far. What matters is from now on.” “… I think things went wrong a long way back, from that night in your office, Mr. President.” “But you don’t want to fix it, do you.” “……” What felt good and what was right or wrong were completely different matters, were they not? With how his whole life seemed planned out by strict rules, how could this man irresponsibly imply that “as long as having sex feels good, it’s enough”! “As you said, we just need to not cross the line.” “……” “As long as things don’t go wrong. And as long as we do no wrong.” Na-Yool looked at Si-Jin with a subtly downcast expression. His rigid black eyes stared steadily at her. His gaze gave out a very uncomfortable softness, as if he was trying to dig into the pit that had barely been filled while reassuring her deeply at the same time. [T/N: The pit figure is used throughout this novel to represent Na-Yool’s struggle on accepting her own feelings.] “I have no intention of dating you. And neither do I with any other woman.” “……” “It was the same with sex. And from now on too. Besides the exception that I am having sex with you.” “Because it’s boring and you don’t have the time.” softly muttered Na-Yool like she had heard enough to get the gist of it. Upon hearing her flat tone which could not even sound sarcastic, Si-Jin shrugged negligently. “I think it will be quite reassuring for you.” The guarantee that you will have sex only with me, despite not being willing to date? Na-Yool silently threw out the dark thoughts rummaging through her mind. It was also true that she was relieved. As long as she did not create trouble for herself. “I won’t mess around.” “If you think that means anything to me, you are wrong Mr. President. I have no reason to be reassured by it and…” “Even so.” “……” A man whom she would not have to worry about messing around with other people. Yet, a man who had no particular obligation to be loyal to her. Like this, just a kind of ambiguous man. …Worry? Why should I worry? Na-Yool’s body trembled as if suddenly startled. If she turned around what Si-Jin said in her mind, all she could hear was that she was convenient. And therefore, she rather had to feel at ease. She had opted for convenience too. Completely worn out by him when they were nothing, she had got carried away by the simple thought that it was enough to even be in a physical relationship with him, enough to be slightly satisfied with just having fun, enough for her not to worry over details… With this appalling self-introspection, Na-Yool put an end to her inner turmoil. As always, moderation was the right choice. Still, a bit of bitter taste remained. And with it, the inexplicable feeling of excitement of sleeping together in this extremely private space then waking up in his bed for the first time, disappeared without a trace. Si-Jin’s seductive lips dug into the hollow of her collarbone. The bitterness persisted. There were two of them, but she felt alone. Like the ugly and lonely words always harped on by Sang-Hoon that she hated to hear. Chapter 17 – Monday morning 8:50 a.m. “How was it?” “What?” “Friday night.” “Ah…” Na-Yool was briefly taken aback by the unexpected question. Hee-Jung’s unknowing face doubled the discomfort. Or more precisely, it was a ‘I don’t know anything that happened, but I know all about your situation’ kind of face. “You went along to the 3rd round, right? You’re a good drinker, as for Seung-Jae he could chuck down gallons!” [T/N: 3rd round as in successively going to 3 different places to have fun. It’s usually the norm in Korea for any party with coworkers.] “I couldn’t even go to the 1st one.” “What, why not?” asked Hee-Jung with wide open eyes. Suspecting that Hee-Jung would pry into her unrelated business with Si-Jin, Na-Yool fiddled with the buttons of the coffee machine without making eye contact. Absolutely pointlessly, since Hee-Jung’s americano was already dripping into the cup. “Because something urgent suddenly came up.” “What is it, what is it? And why do you look like that?” elatedly pressed Hee-Jung, jumping on the opportunity. Na-Yool had never thought Hee-Jung to be the inquisitive type, but how could she have known how valuable office gossip was to the minds tired from working tediously? “Just something personal.” “To Seung-Jae?” “No, me.”