New Life : A Second Chance

Sayuri laughed with Kay, and they both put their heads together and started sniffing the opened packet of vinegar chips again.

"Well, since I can't drink, I might as well get high on this instead," Sayuri said, giggling again.

They started munching on the chips. Sayuri was glad that Kay seemed to have calmed down and she didn't push for her to start again. 

Start talking, that is. Not the crying bit.

"I think it began when we were at Country M, right after Kylie died," Kay said, thinking back, "He was so different from all the guys I knew. The depth of his feelings, the way he wasn't afraid of showing them. The way he cared for his sister. Him trying to be so strong."

Kay sighed.

"I think that's about the same for me," Sayuri admitted, "When it began, I mean. Kyle cooking chicken porridge for me when he thought I was sick."

Kay nodded, understanding, "Sensitive and caring guys are so rare, right? All the guys I have met, and who were wooing me, were these … I don't know. Guys that were full of testosterone or something."

"That could be Kyle's fault," Sayuri mused, "I mean, look at him. He's like the perfect example of what a guy should be and you're his sister! So these guys probably felt they needed to be better than him - or at least, try to be at par with him."

"I suppose," Kay said, thinking about Joseph.

"He's so sweet, you know? He does all these things for you, subconsciously, which just shows how much he is thinking about you," Kay said, "It's all so natural for him."

She started chewing on the chips more aggressively, showing her frustration, "No wonder he's so popular in school. All those bees hanging around him and he, being oh so nice to all of them."

"So you see, it's an entirely one-sided affair on my part," Kay lamented, "He doesn't treat me any differently from anyone else. I'm just one of those who have fallen into his net."

"I know that. I know," Kay wailed, putting her head on the table and resting her cheek on it, "Everything points to one thing: he isn't the one. He's just like that but yet, no matter how many times I tell myself … I can't help it."

Kay started smiling stupidly, "He has the sweetest smile, you know? And when he looks at you, it's the most beautiful thing ever."

Sayuri patted Kay's back, "You have it bad."

Kay groaned.

"I know," she agreed, "I'm such a bad person. I've got to get him out of my mind."

"You have to get him out of your heart first," Sayuri pointed out.

"I'm trying!" Kay said, "I'm even going on all those blind dates Mum sets me up with. Gah, Sayuri. Those guys are so pretentious and boring!"

"One after another, each one worse than the one before," Kay complained, "Just where is Mum pulling them out from? But I still go and will continue to go. Who knows, right? I might meet the so-called 'one'."

"So, your plan is to ignore Joseph during these four years? Wait for him to grow up and then pursue him?" Sayuri asked.

"I guess," Kay said, "No, not ignore but not do anything. I mean, if I was to even have a sliver of a chance, I can't cut off all communication with him, right?"

"I just won't … well, do anything, I guess. Did you know that Big Bro Nic deliberately riled up Xing Han just so that Xing Han would think of him all the time? Maybe not rile up, but tease him? It's so funny when you think about it."

"But even then, he didn't have to wait that long and he had valid reasons to always be around," Kay sighed, "I don't. Well, not really."

"You could, you know," Sayuri said, thinking about it, "Lianne knows the truth, right? And you were the one that was there for him during his bleakest moment. Perhaps you could … I don't know. Go over the school and go out as a group or something. Dahlia is also at the same school, right?"

"You don't have to tease him like how Nitocris did, but you can increase your presence so that he doesn't forget you," Sayuri replied.

"Hanging out with Lianne wouldn't be too weird, right?" continued Sayuri, "And since he knows you as well, him tagging along wouldn't be unusual either. You don't have to woo him, but don't let him forget you either."

"Am I bad for having feelings like this, towards such a young one?" Kay asked miserably.

She was often assailed with guilt about this and she had no one to truly ask. Well, she did but she had never thought about it. It had been on her mind for nearly a year now and it was driving her insane.

She had even thought that by keeping it in, her feelings got stronger.

Sayuri lay her head on Kay's shoulder, saying, "No. All feelings are pure. Whether you fall for an older person, or a younger one. Whether it's a girl or a guy. One, or two. Heck, even if it's a married man."

"Sayuri!!" Kay gasped, looking at her, "I can't believe you said that!"

Sayuri shrugged, "I said feelings. What you do with those feelings is the deciding factor. If the guy is married and you still go for him, then you're a douchebag."

"I don't blame anyone being in love with Kyle or falling for him," Sayuri said, "I only eliminate those who start acting on them."

Kay nodded. It made sense.

"Am I stupid to wait for him? Am I fool?" she asked.

"You're really asking me? A person who has been waiting for your brother for the past four years? Who had been fucking him senseless for months in the hopes he'd fall for me?" Sayuri asked.

"True. We're both fools," Kay sighed.