Chapter 71: Where Is Cassian?

Rafael was awake.

Karina learned this the before she stepped into the healer’s chamber, because the first thing she heard was his voice, hoarse, cracking, but unmistakably furious.

"—you idiot," Rafael was saying, his voice scraping against the stone walls. He was propped up against a stack of pillows, his head wrapped in bandages that made him look like a half-unraveled mummy. One of his emerald eyes was swollen shut, but the other was burning with anger. "You had him. You had him right there. Your claws were in him, Leonidas. And you let him go."

Leonidas lay on the adjacent bed, his chest wrapped in linen. He was staring at the ceiling.

"I know," he said quietly.

"You know?" Rafael’s voice cracked. He tried to push himself upright, winced, and fell back against the pillows with a groan. "You know? That’s all you have to say? That man is going to come back, Leonidas. He’s going to come back, and he’s going to finish what he started, and the next time he won’t miss!"

"I know, Rafael."

"Then why?" Rafael demanded. "Why did you let him go? You could have ended it. You could have stopped him right there, and instead you—"

Leonidas closed his eyes.

"Damn it, Rafael! I was selfish! Is that what you want to hear me say?!" he exclaimed. "I heard what he said about Karina. About coming for her. And I stopped thinking. I stopped caring about anything except getting back here. Getting to her. Warning her."

Rafael stared at him.

"You left him," he said, quieter now. "You left Shadow’s Edge. You left our people. Dorian is still out there because you chose to run instead of fight."

"I know."

"Damn it, Leonidas." Rafael pressed his hand against his eyes. "I don’t know whether to yell at you or thank you. You did save my life, after all."

"Yell," Leonidas said flatly. "I deserve it."

A beat of silence passed between them. Then Rafael let out a long, shaky breath and dropped his hand.

"You’re a fool," he said.

"I know."

The door to the chamber creaked open.

Both men turned their heads.

Karina stepped inside, her red hair neatly pinned back. She looked composed. Utterly unlike the woman who had been pacing a groove into the carpet not twenty minutes ago.

Behind her came Zarek, his eyes taking in the room with a single sweep. He stationed himself near the door, arms crossed, saying nothing.

Karina stopped at the foot of Leonidas’s bed.

"Empress," Leonidas said. His voice was hoarse. He tried to push himself up, winced, and settled for a shallow bow of his head instead. "You came."

"Hmm." Was all she offered. She looked at the bandages wrapped around his chest, the pallor of his skin, the dark circles under his eyes. "How are your wounds?"

"Healing." Leonidas swallowed. "The healers say I’ll recover. Given time."

"Good."

Silence stretched between them.

Leonidas’s fingers twisted in the blanket. He wanted to say something, but every word he could think of felt wrong.

"What of Valen?" he asked finally.

Karina’s expression flickered. "He’s with his brothers."

"How is..." Leonidas hesitated. "How is he?"

Karina opened her mouth to answer, but before she could, the door opened again.

Corvin stepped inside. He bowed his head to Karina first, then to Zarek, and finally turned his attention to Leonidas.

"The prince is not yet ready to see you," Corvin said quietly. "He needs time."

Leonidas nodded, once, and looked away.

"I understand," he said.

Karina watched the way his shoulders slumped, the way his hands fisted in the blanket. She felt a pang of something, not sympathy, exactly, but something adjacent to it.

She looked at him.

Leonidas looked back.

Karina felt her throat tighten.

"I hope you know," she said, her voice quiet but steady, "that this doesn’t mean I’m taking you back as my husband."

Leonidas flinched. It was small, barely a twitch of his jaw, but she saw it.

"I know," he whispered. "I know it doesn’t."

Karina held his gaze, waiting for the argument. Waiting for him to beg, to plead, to promise her the world if she would just come back.

But he didn’t.

He just nodded, his eyes dropping to the blanket.

"To prove it," he said slowly, "I will back off. Completely. No more letters. No more requests. No more—" He swallowed hard. "No more anything. You want your freedom, Karina? You have it. I won’t stand in your way."

Karina blinked.

She hadn’t expected that.

For a long moment, she stood there, staring at him. Searching his face for any sign of manipulation, any hint that this was just another tactic.

But he looked sincere.

"Wait," she said suddenly, a thought slipping into her mind. "What about Cassian?"

Leonidas’s eyes snapped up.

"What?"

"Cassian." Karina’s voice sharpened. "What happened to him? Was he also attacked—"

She stopped. Her chest was tight. Her hands were trembling.

Leonidas stared at her.

"I don’t know," he admitted. "I left before—I don’t know what happened to him."

Karina’s breath caught.

No.

She took a step back, then another. Her heart was pounding, her vision blurring at the edges.

No, no, no.

"I need—" Her voice cracked, and she shook her head hard, already turning for the door. "I need to find him. I need to know he’s alright."

"Karina." Leonidas tried to push himself upright, wincing hard, but his body betrayed him, the movement sending a fresh wave of pain across his face. "Karina, wait—"

She didn’t wait. She was already moving, boots striking hard and fast against the stone floor as she shoved through the door and out into the corridor beyond. Servants scattered out of her path, startled by the look on her face, the panic burning behind her eyes.

Zarek was right behind her.

He fell into step at her side without a word, matching her pace easily despite her speed.

"Empress—"

"Don’t," she said, not slowing. "Don’t tell me to calm down. Don’t tell me it’s fine. You don’t know that it’s fine."

"I wasn’t going to." He stepped forward, his hand reaching out to steady her. "Breathe."

Karina sucked in a shaky breath. Then another. She pressed a hand to her chest, trying to slow her racing heart.

"Cassian," she said again. "He could be hurt. He could be dead. And I’m just standing here—"

"Breathe," Zarek repeated. "Do you want me to go check?"

Karina looked up at him, her eyes wide.

"What?"

"I can go," Zarek said. "I’m fast. I can be there and back in five days. Less, if I don’t stop to rest."

Karina stared at him.

"No," she said. "Zarek, I—don’t go. I—"

She stopped and sniffed. Pressed her hand harder against her chest, trying to hold herself together.

"That murderer is still out there," she whispered. "If you go, you could—he could—"

"I’ll be careful," Zarek said. "I’ll take guards. A full unit."

"But then you’d be gone for days. A week, maybe. And I—" Karina’s voice cracked. "I don’t—"

She turned away, her shoulders shaking.

Zarek watched her, feeling a strange pang of jealousy.

Is this Cassian that important to you?

He didn’t ask the question. He wasn’t sure he wanted the answer.

Karina turned back around, her eyes red-rimmed but dry. She had pulled herself together. Barely.

"I want to see my children," she said.

Zarek nodded slowly. "Of course."

She let out a sigh, then looked at him again.

"You can do whatever you want," she said. "Go, or stay. I—it’s not my place to tell you what to do."

Zarek studied her for a long moment.

"Don’t worry," he said finally. "I’ll go."

Karina’s breath hitched.

"Be careful," she whispered.

Zarek inclined his head.

"I will."

He turned around, leaving her to herself.

Karina’s heart pounded, and her hands trembled.

Why am I so worried?

Why does this hurt so much?

She didn’t have an answer, and she wasn’t sure she wanted one.