My Online Girlfriend Has a Twin Sister

I got carried away then, unable to control the thoughts that had been plaguing me. I mumbled, “You make it sound so simple… In that case, can I ask you to be my boyfriend? Then I won’t have to put up with this kind of thing anymore.” The moment I said it, I immediately regretted it. I could even hear my own heart pounding.

For those few seconds, as I held my breath, so many thoughts flashed through my mind.

If you had stayed silent any longer, Little Young Master, I probably would have hung up out of sheer embarrassment. I did end up hanging up, but it was because you said yes, and an even more indescribable shyness flooded my heart.

From then on, we changed how we addressed each other the very next day and naturally began our online relationship.

But after we met in real life—after seeing you in person and experiencing everything with you—I’ve come to feel that my confession back then was a bit too flippant.

So, I’m writing this Love Letter.

Whether it’s to ensure we have a happy future together, for our long-lasting companionship, or to make up for that unceremonious confession… Little Young Master! I, Yaoyao, believe this is absolutely necessary.

I want to be very, very serious about this—so serious I’d have a stern look on my face. If you were in front of me right now, I’d probably make you sit up straight, face me, and then I would summon all my courage.

Chen Yuan, I really, really like you so much! I can’t even control how much I like you myself.

When we were just dating online, my feelings weren’t this vivid or intense. But after meeting in person, I’ve started to believe this is fate.

You almost perfectly match the image of the perfect boyfriend I had in my mind. And as we’ve spent more time together, I’ve discovered even more of your wonderful qualities. It’s just incredible.

I really don’t want to be clingy every day, but a lot of the time, I just can’t help it. Whenever I’m with you, time flies by. When we’re apart, a single minute feels like a whole year. Like right now, as I’m writing this letter, I keep looking at the clock in the living room and occasionally glancing at my phone to see if you’ve replied to my messages. You’ve completely taken over my thoughts. I can’t imagine how I’ll get through this winter break without you by my side.

Even though you’re always so gentle with me, putting up with the little tantrums I throw on purpose and the pranks I pull, being so clingy all the time must make you feel like you have no personal space, right? …That’s how I console myself. This time apart is so we can have a better future together. Thinking that makes me feel a little better.

So, I hope that in the future, when I can’t snap out of it and start taking up all your space because I care too much (Ծ‸Ծ), you won’t get tired of me, okay? Please think about all the good things I do for you, the pleading look on my face when I feel wronged, our daily life together, and the scarf I knitted for you with my own hands. Forgive my childishness… Little Young Master, forgive me for not always being able to think maturely and for not knowing how to keep the right amount of distance.

Forgive me for always wanting to be a little closer to you.

I’ve heard my best friends say that a girl is at her ugliest when she gives her whole heart, ignores all reason, and loves someone with all her might.

Because in doing so, a girl who was once beautiful loses her mystique. People discover that once you peel back her outer layers, she’s actually quite foolish inside. Having lost some of her appeal and unable to receive the same amount of love in return, she becomes suspicious and sensitive. And as she longs for a more fulfilling love, she starts to feel insignificant.

I understand that, but I don’t want to play hot and cold or use clever tricks to keep you tied to my side.

I just couldn’t live with myself if I did.

In the end, it’s all because I like you too much, Little Young Master. Sometimes I just want to cut open your heart and see if I’m the only one in there. That way, I wouldn’t get jealous of other people anymore… As I worry about these things, I wonder, do they all sound ridiculous to you?

I’ve told you everything now, so you’re not allowed to laugh at me, okay!

Speaking of you meeting my standards for a partner, you’re probably feeling pretty smug right now… but I’m not afraid of you being narcissistic. To be honest, it’s not an exaggeration to say you fit them perfectly. Every young girl fantasizes about her future partner during her teenage years. Love is a captivating thing, especially since I used to read a lot of romance novels back then.

I’d never been in a relationship before. At least, before I met you, I’d never known what it felt like to have my heart flutter for someone.

But when I was alone, spacing out—at sixteen, during afternoons when I practiced the piano, or while sitting by the window at my desk—I would subconsciously sketch out an image of someone standing far away, separated by so many years. It was as if my boyfriend was waiting for me. He would love all of me, be willing to treat me with the same devotion I had for him, and wouldn’t give his heart away easily.

Even though I was a dummy who was so clumsy I could never pass a math test, so much of a shut-in that I had no friends, so timid I was afraid to go out alone, and so used to being protected that I was never brave… even with all those flaws, he would still like me.

And I would love him with all my strength. I would be willing to change for him.

I had no idea how long I’d have to wait for such a distant, uncertain person. I just held on to the fantasy that he would appear soon, very soon, and become a ray of light in my life, illuminating my timid self just like in a fairy tale.

He didn’t need to be exceptional. He didn’t need any of the things the world values. He just had to share the same principles as me and not be some scumbag who just goes with the flow. If so, my waiting would be worth it.

And just like that, I got through my teenage years.

Sixteen, twenty, twenty-six.

A whole decade passed, and I still hadn’t given up on my fantasy. And then, you appeared.

You became that person.

I can’t describe what your appearance in my life means to me. All I can say is that every night when I go to sleep, I look forward to the next day, because it means I can see you.

Writing this Love Letter up to this point, I feel like my heart is floating. I suddenly find myself smiling. I can’t believe being in love can be so wonderful that I almost can’t bear to enjoy it any more than I already do.

It’s such a strange and wonderful feeling.

So if one day, I could marry you, wearing the beautiful wedding dress you picked out for me… I would definitely be so happy I’d cry.

Right now, are you already at home? Little Young Master, the weather is surprisingly nice today. I expect this letter will get to you on New Year’s Eve, which is great.

Because you know my memory isn’t the best… I’ve probably already forgotten most of what I’ve written. That way, even when you’re reading this Love Letter, I won’t be too embarrassed all the way over here in Mingzhu City.

Besides expressing my feelings for you, this Love Letter must, of course, set aside a small section to present an award to my respected and beloved Little Young Master!

Presenting the “Good Boyfriend Medal”… Hee hee.

Of course, there’s no actual medal, so I can only praise you verbally.

First, thank you, Little Young Master, for being so serious about your feelings all these years and not dating casually. Because of that, we get to share so many wonderful “firsts.” I’m so honored to be your first love! I can’t imagine how jealous I would be if you had an ex-girlfriend. You did a great job on that front, Little Young Master. What was that phrase again…? “Maintaining your purity.” Um… “Guarding your chastity.”

They say a man’s first love is his most unforgettable. Thankfully, our relationship won’t have any drama about an unforgettable first love.

Love you, love you, love you~

If a verbal award isn’t enough, I can bestow a sweet kiss upon you… and if that’s still not enough, I can give you a mysterious award when we get back to Lanjing.

No need to fantasize, it’s exactly what you’re thinking of~

Ahem!

Second, Little Young Master, you really are exceptional. I’ve rarely met a guy like you—so pure, upright, and kind-hearted, with a kind of untainted beauty.

It’s a good thing we didn’t meet too late. You’re only eighteen.

I’m lucky enough to witness your youthful innocence and to accompany you through some of the most meaningful years of your life.

I have to say, you really are still just a young boy… but I’m willing to be with you as you grow up. I look forward to the day you become a man who can support a family, successfully evolving from an excellent boyfriend into an excellent husband.

Since I’ll be with you as you grow up, you’d better not let me down in the future.

And third… I’ve written so much without even realizing it. I’ll make this last part short and wrap it up.

To be honest, my hand is getting a little sore.

If—and I’m just saying if—one day, our relationship faces a crisis… maybe it’s because an irreconcilable conflict arises between us, or our chosen paths diverge and what we want from life becomes too different, or maybe it’s because I grow old and frail, no longer beautiful enough to hold your affection for long.

I hope that, when that time comes, you can remember the wonderful times we spent together and remember the love I had for you when you were eighteen.

Be a little more patient with each other, and let’s not drift apart in the end.

…

Oh, right!

Don’t you dare forget to write in the Heartbeat Diary! I’ve been writing in it properly every time, so you better not slack off!

This is very, very, very important (mutter, mutter).

Happy New Year~ Little Young Master.

You have to grow up well, okay?